


infinity with you

by laurenjauregui



Category: Fifth Harmony (Band)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-25
Updated: 2017-09-25
Packaged: 2019-01-05 10:13:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 45,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12188016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laurenjauregui/pseuds/laurenjauregui
Summary: Camila Cabello moves to Miami. She doesn't want to. It's only for a year, and it's not like a year can have any significant impact on her life. She doesn't plan on making friends or talking to anybody.But when that plan falls through the roof, and the friends she does make introduce her to possibly the hottest girl alive, the adorable Lauren Jauregui, she decides to dive in head first and ask Lauren out, but constantly gets rejected. She doesn't understand why, and most of all she wants to know what Lauren is hiding from her.





	infinity with you

“Mija, are you ready to go?”

Her mother’s voice carries through to her room, and Camila rolls her eyes. She knows she’s running late already, but it’s not like she’s trying to be early. She didn’t want to move in the first place, and now she has to go to some shitty school she doesn’t like. She doesn’t want to be the new kid, and doesn’t want to meet new people with the same drama as the old ones.

But, she sighs, and picks up her phone from her bed, the only familiar thing in this new house. She can’t avoid school forever, no matter how much she wishes she could.

Eventually, she grabs her things and pushes open her bedroom door, stomping out to meet her mother in the hallway. Everything about her old house, her _home_ , seems better than this house. For one, this house doesn’t even have _stairs._ Camila is constantly paranoid that a murderer could casually climb in through her bedroom window, so paranoid that she can’t keep it open to get fresh air.

Everything about this house, about _Miami_ is odd. Especially since her dad isn’t here with them.

She sighs as she follows her mother out of the car. She smiles once throughout the car journey, when her mother drops Sofi off at her new school, and she has to say goodbye to her. Even though Camila hates this place, she’s not taking that out on her little sister. Her _mother_ , however, is fair game.

When Sinu pulls up outside Camila’s new school, she gives her mom a rather harsh goodbye, just so she knows she’s still not okay with this move, and heads towards the school building, her resting bitch face in full effect.

She doesn’t look back until she’s sure her mother has driven away, and then tries to figure out how she’s going to get to the main office, since she doesn’t know the school. She knows she’s going to have to ask someone, even though her main goal was to _not_ interact with anyone here. She has one year of high school left. There’s no point in making friends now.

(No point in going to a new school either, but _Sinu_ doesn’t seem to agree.)

A confused Camila turns to the nearest unaccompanied person, a tall girl with long, flowing blonde locks. The girl looks like she’s about to hit the runway, not go to school. “Excuse me? Can you, uh, show me where the main office is? I can’t find it.”

For someone who looks so intimidating, the smile the girl flashes is entirely uncharacteristic. “Yeah, of course. It’s actually not too far from here.”

Camila smiles gratefully. Might as well be polite. “I’m Camila, by the way.”

“Dinah,” the girl introduces herself. “If you want, I can hang around and show you to your first class once you get your schedule.”

Thinking it easier than walking around by herself and probably being late, Camila nods in agreement. But she’s _not_ doing this because she wants friends. No way in hell. “Thanks for offering.”

“No problem,” Dinah holds a door open for her, “the main office is in there. I’ll wait out here for you.”

Camila nods, and goes up to the main desk, trying her best to smile politely at the woman behind the desk. “Excuse me, I’m a new student and was told to come here for my class schedule?”

“Oh, yes,” the woman smiles at her, and rifles through some papers for a moment, before handing her a worryingly full looking schedule. “Here you are. There’s a map there too.”

“Thanks,” Camila mumbles out, and turns on her heel and makes a hasty exit.

When she rounds the corner, Dinah is still there, but she’s accompanied by another girl. Another completely _flawless_ girl. Like, literally flawless. There’s not even one _tiny_ blemish on the girl’s beautiful black skin, and that makes Camila all the more intimidating.

Are _all_ of Dinah’s friends literal runway models?

“Oh, hi,” Dinah greets her with a grin, “this is Normani. Normani, this is Camila.”

“Nice to meet you,” Normani smiles at her, “apparently Dinah offered to show you to class. First time she’s ever done something nice for someone.”

“Shut up, Mani,” Dinah rolls her eyes. “Anyway, Camila, show me your schedule.”

At the _demand_ , Camila passes her schedule over to Dinah, who smiles. But, instead of giving it back to Camila, she passes it to Normani, who grins too.

“We’re in most of these,” Normani smiles, “so we won’t have to set off now. Want to join us for something to eat before class?”

Camila takes her schedule back with a frown. She’s not sure she wants to do that, because that sounds a lot like making friends, the exact thing she doesn’t want to do, because she’ll just end up having to leave them when she goes off to college next year.

But, not actually having the backbone to say this, Camila smiles and nods. “Yeah, sure.”

“Cool,” Dinah smiles at her. “Come join the two funnest people here.”

“Most fun,” Normani corrects her with an eye roll. “Dumbass.”

“Says the girl who’s turning into Ralph,” Dinah argues with her, before she turns back to Camila with a smile. “The cafeteria is this way. We’ll grab some food and then head to class. We’ll give you a tour at lunch.”

Camila nods, and when Normani moves ahead, follows behind with Dinah. “So, um, are all of your friends supermodels, or just you and her? What about this Ralph person? He a male model?”

Dinah bursts out laughing. “Well, I know I’m cute, but damn. Supermodel material? I’ll think of that as a career. Also, Ralph’s a girl.”

Before Camila has a chance to think _wow, weird name for a girl_ , Normani explains. “And Ralph isn’t even her real name. It’s one of Dinah’s lame nicknames for her. Her name is Lauren, but she doesn’t go here.”

“Oh,” Camila nods, and thanks the lord that she won’t be meeting any more potential supermodels today. “So… aside from this Lauren girl, where are all the other Victoria’s Secret models?”

“Believe it or not, it’s just us,” Normani explains. “There used to be four of us. Ally is a few years older and she graduated two years ago. She goes to the University of Miami. Lauren was here last year, but she, uh…”

Normani trials off and glances at Dinah, who elaborates. “She left. She’s homeschooled now. So it’s just us.”

“Oh,” Camila frowns. “Well, uh, cool.”

“Anyways, the cafeteria is through here. If you don’t want anything it’s best you wait outside since it’s pretty crowded in there.” Normani explains, and disappears through the double doors. Dinah hangs back with Camila.

“So, why’d you move?” Dinah asks. “You live in Miami and just change schools, or…”

“Um, no I lived in Cali. But we’re here because of my mom. She got this big job opportunity.” Camila says, finishing that sentence in her head with, _and didn’t seem to care that her kid didn’t want to move and it’d split the family in half._

“Oh, I see,” Dinah nods, “I was born in Santa Ana, actually. But Miami is pretty cool too.”

Camila hums, because she doesn’t see _how_ Miami is going to be _cool_. She doesn’t want to be here. She just wants to go home. In her mind, this year is just a stop by and it’s not going to mean anything to her.

Normani walks out of the cafeteria with a smile. “Okay, so, let’s show you to the classroom. We’ll give you a tour at lunch.”

Camila wants to say _no, that’s fine_ , but eventually just nods and accepts her fate. She guesses _acquaintances_ can’t be that bad. If she ever needs someone to show her where a classroom is, she can always ask Dinah and Normani.

They show her the classroom, and in Camila’s mind, that’s where she’s going to make her strategic escape. On the way, they show a few things to her, and one thing makes Camila feel a little sad. It’s a memorial for a girl who’d passed away. It doesn’t say how, just that it happened almost a year prior.

She goes to ask about it, but Normani just powers forwards, and Dinah opens the door to a classroom for her. She plans on excusing herself to a desk, but Dinah practically pushes her into the desk nearest to them with a wide grin. “If only Lauser was still here, then she’d have someone to sit with.”

“I’d be sitting with Lauren, she’s my best friend,” Normani rolls her eyes, “obviously.”

“Oh, _please_ , Mani,” Dinah flips her hair over her shoulder, “you can’t resist me.”

Normani rolls her eyes, and Camila frowns at the less than platonic interaction. Normani seems to catch on. “Yes, we’re dating. Even though she’s annoying.”

Dinah frowns at her. “Is that a problem?”

“I’m honestly the gayest person on the planet,” Camila tells them. She really hadn’t been planning on coming out so soon, but considering they’re dating, it’s obvious that they won’t tell anyone if she says not to. “So… it’d basically be more of a problem if you guys were straight.”

Dinah laughs. “I like that. Ally’s the token straight of our little group.”

“Ally and Troy are the only tolerable straight couple,” Normani continues, “but anyway, yeah, thanks for being honest with us. I know some people have problems coming out to anyone, even other LGBT people.”

“Oh, well, I’m pretty open about it,” Camila admits, “the first person I ever came out to was my little sister, and she asked me why I was crying when I did it, because apparently she has it worse than me since – and I quote – _She has to marry a dumb boy and end up with cooties_.”

Dinah laughs. “That’s cute.”

“Yeah, it was adorable until she casually announced at dinner that night that I was going to marry a girl.” Camila recounts, and smiles a little at the memory. Though when it actually happened, she’d been terrified of her parents’ reactions, now it’s a funny thing to look back on.

Normani opens her mouth to reply, but their teacher starts the lesson and she turns to the front. Camila spends most of the class thinking about how maybe she won’t make an escape and sit by herself. Maybe Normani and Dinah would be worth hanging out with. Even though Camila is an introvert, she likes some company.

Yeah, _screw it_ , she decides, _I’ll stick around_.

-

For the first time ever, her first few weeks at school fly by. Everything goes quickly, and she puts that down to Dinah and Normani making everything fun. Even though they’re a couple, Camila doesn’t feel like a third wheel, because although they’re dating, they’re best friends, too.

On the Friday of her third week, Normani stops her on the way out of the school doors. “Do you want to hang out tonight?”

Camila blinks in surprise. “Really?”

“Yeah, we’re having a pizza night over at my place.” Normani says, “If you want to join, you can do.”

“Just you and Dinah?” Camila asks, because she really doesn’t want to crash their date. Also, she’s super awkward around new people when she’s not more concerned about other things. Since her anger over moving has placated, the one thing she’ll be stressing about is being awkward around people.

“No,” Normani answers, and Camila’s throat knots. “Ally and Lauren will be there too. Don’t worry, they’re nice. Ally is the nicest person you’ll ever meet.”

Camila thinks that maybe it’d be nice to put a face to the names that crop up relatively often, so she makes another on the spot _fuck it_ decision that she knows she’ll regret. “Sure. I’m in.”

“Cool,” Normani nods, “bring cash for pizza. Dinah and I are splitting one because we can’t eat a full one each, I don’t know how much you can eat or not because Lauren and Ally generally have their own.”

“I can eat like, _three_ whole large pizzas by myself,” Camila says, “I don’t have a limit when it comes to pizza.”

Normani laughs. “I figured you’d say something like that. I’ll text you my address, everyone is coming over at six. If you need a ride I can give you one.”

“Okay,” Camila nods, “thanks for the invite.”

Camila goes home with mixed feelings. She’s not sure if she wants to meet these two new people, but if they’re friends with her friends, then they’ve got to be alright. Plus, she’ll get pizza, which is good for her.

(Well, it’s not, but in Camila’s mind, pizza is good for the soul.)

She goes home and makes sure to put her wallet and her phone charger into her purse – she never knows when she’ll need extra battery – and changes into one of her better pairs of jeans and a button up plaid shirt.

She waits until Normani texts that she’s outside, and with a quick goodbye to her mom and a big hug with Sofi, she heads outside and jumps into the backseat of Normani’s car out of habit, since Dinah is usually in the passenger seat. It’s a good thing she got in the back, because otherwise she would’ve sat on the unfamiliar girl in the front seat.

The girl sends her a bright, sunshiny smile. “You must be Camila. I’ve heard so much about you, it’s lovely to finally meet you. I’m Ally.”

Camila sends back an awkward smile – really, she sucks at talking to people. “Hi. It’s nice to meet you too. Dinah and Mani talk about you a lot.”

“Well, they’d better be good things,” Ally grins, “I’d be hurt if y’all were slandering me behind my back.”

Normani grins. “Don’t worry, Alz, we wouldn’t do that.”

“It’s nice to finally put a face to the name,” Camila says, “you go to college, right?”

“Yeah, University of Miami. I’m in my junior year. I’ve known the girls for years, though,” Ally explains, “but you won’t have met Lauren yet, will you?”

“No, she hasn’t,” Normani answers for her, “but she’s already over at my place. She’s been there since I got in, basically.”

Camila is a little relieved. The fact that she met Ally and it wasn’t scary makes her feel better about meeting the mysterious Lauren.

_Maybe Ally just isn’t a scary person, though_ , Camila thinks, _even though she also looks like model, the constant smiles are comforting. Maybe that’s just messing me up and lulling me into a false sense of security._

Camila tries to shake her fears as they pull up outside of Normani’s house. It can’t be that bad. Whatever this Lauren thinks of her, Camila doesn’t care. She repeats that to herself as she walks into Normani’s house and takes her shoes off.

_I don’t care_. She keeps that thought in her head, locked in the back of her mind. Once she’s taken her shoes off, Camila follows Normani into her lounge, and her eyes widen when she spots the one person in the room she doesn’t know. On the couch across from her, there’s the most beautiful girl she’s ever seen.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck,_ Camila’s brain goes into overdrive, _oh my god, I do care_.

She _knows_ that this is Lauren, and she knows that she’s not going to be able to form a coherent sentence, because _look_ at her. Her hair is choppy and messy, but not in a bad way, in the way that seems like she spent hours to make it look like she’d just rolled out of bed. Her features are perfectly chiselled, like god himself had taken extra care into moulding the perfect human. Her lips look plump and soft, something Camila wants to kiss until they’re red and swollen, and the silver stud in her left nostril makes Camila’s heart pound, because piercings are so attractive to her.

_God_ , this girl is perfection incarnate.

“Oh, Camila, this is Lauren,” Normani introduces her, not noticing Camila’s internal struggle. “Laur, this is Camila. She just started at our school a few weeks back.”

Lauren looks up, and Camila is met with a pair of piercing emerald eyes. She feels as though Lauren is looking right into her very soul, and that she can see all of the less than pure thoughts about her swimming around in Camila’s mind.

She’s so intimidated, because this girl looks like the typical badass, indifferent asshole who isn’t going to give her a warm welcome.

But then, Lauren smiles the cutest smile, and Camila feels honoured that it’s directed at her. “Hey. Nice to meet you.”

“Hi,” Camila says, cringing when she stutters a little, but Lauren’s voice is so raspy and _perfect_ and she would listen to it all day if she could. “Um… I haven’t seen you around at school.”

When she says that, she instantly remembers that Dinah and Normani had told her Lauren was homeschooled, and she wants to smack herself. What if it’s a sensitive topic?

“I’m homeschooled.” Lauren answers easily. “I used to go there, though. How’re you finding it?”

“Um… could be worse,” Camila murmurs, and Lauren laughs. “I don’t mind it.”

“Yeah, it’s okay for a school,” Lauren agrees with her. “Where’d you move from?”

“California,” Camila answers, her heart about to beat out of her chest from pure nervousness, “but before that I lived in Cuba. Moved to America when I was little.”

“That’s really cool,” Lauren smiles again and Camila’s heart goes crazy. “I’m Cuban too, actually, but I was born here.”

Camila beams, a little wider than she usually would’ve, but she actually has _common ground_ with the intimidatingly attractive girl. That’s something that never happens. You know, except in Camila’s literal dreams.

“Hey, Mila’s here!” Dinah announces as she walks into the room. “Perfect. Now we can order.”

When Camila turns back from looking at Dinah, Lauren has looked back at her phone, and Camila has the sinking realisation that a girl like that _has_ to be taken. Besides, she could be straight, _and_ it’s not like she’s going to be interested in _Camila_ anyway.

Camila sighs to herself, and then her heart is back into overdrive when Dinah pushes her down on the couch _directly next to the scarily hot girl_. Lauren turns to her and smiles again, but then looks back at her phone.

“So, Mila,” Dinah collapses next to her, “what pizza are you wanting. Are you one of those weirdos that has pineapple on pizza, because if you are, get out of Mani’s house.”

“Um…” Camila trails off, about to admit that she kind of _is_. Like, it’s not her first choice, but she’d eat it.

Lauren speaks before she can. “Pineapple on pizza is a disgrace.”

“Yeah, I hate it,” Camila blurts out without thinking, “I’ll have pepperoni.”

“Okay,” Dinah nods and notes that down, before heading over to Normani who has her laptop out, leaving Camila completely under Lauren’s mercy.

“So, um,” Camila speaks without thinking, and when Lauren looks up, her breath catches in her throat. “I- um… how long have you- have you known Dinah and Normani?”

“Oh, since we were kids, basically,” Lauren explains, “I met Normani when she was in kindergarten and I was in first grade and we were mortal enemies because she stole my Nala, which is not okay in my little six-year-old mind. We made friends because we both rallied like, all of the kindergarten and first grade class into sides, because obviously we were going to go into a battle to the death. I still think that was unfair because the kindergartners all looked up to Mani since she was a year older. Long story short, we both got sent to the principal’s office and made friends outside because we both found us getting into trouble funny. After that, I met Dinah through Mani, and we all met Ally together.”

“Wait,” Camila frowns, “that means you’ve graduated, if you’re a year older than Dinah. And that Mani should be in college.”

“Mani started school a year late because she moved around a lot as a kid,” Lauren tells her, “and I have to redo my senior year because… reasons.”

Not wanting to push, but still being curious, Camila keeps her questions to herself, but there’s a lot buzzing around in her head. What did Lauren do? Did she get expelled because of something? “Oh. Well, uh… I’m going to- uh, go see what Dinah and Mani are doing.”

She stands up and hurries off, but she can feel Lauren’s bright green gaze fixed on her as she retreats and she knows she’s made a fool of herself.

When she sits down next to Dinah and Normani, she chances it and glances over at Lauren, who has been taken into conversation by Ally.

“So, have you guys ordered?” Camila asks, suddenly feeling self-conscious about the fact they’re getting pizza. Camila looks like an _animal_ when she eats pizza, and that’s not something she wants to look like when she’s trying to impress a pretty girl.

Normani sends her a knowing look and Camila’s throat closes over. “Yeah, we’ve ordered. You have fun talking to Lauren?”

“Um, yeah,” Camila nods. “She seems nice.”

“She can be a little quiet at first,” Dinah tells her, raising her voice at the next part, “You know, Lauser’s a total fucking _nerd_ , god knows why we’re friends with her, really.”

“Nobody knows why I grace you with my presence,” Lauren shoots back from across the room. “Don’t know why I didn’t ditch you when you were a clingy little brat who followed me everywhere.”

“I _never_ did that,” Dinah exasperatedly sighs, and when Lauren lets out a laugh that’s more like a cackle and turns back to Ally, Dinah lowers her voice. “I didn’t do that, for the record. Don’t listen to her.”

Camila laughs a little. “Well, the way you’re so adamant about it makes me think you did.”

“Don’t know what adamant means,” Dinah rolls her eyes, “but I didn’t, okay?”

Normani sends Dinah a disbelieving look and laughs. “Of course you didn’t, babe. Anyway, Mila, since this is your first time coming over, do you want to pick what show we watch?”

“Um, sure,” Camila nods as Normani passes her the TV remote, and scrolls through Netflix for a decent show. She settles on _American Horror Story: Hotel_ , and her heart leaps when she gets Lauren’s attention because of her choice.

“I fucking love _American Horror Story_ ,” Lauren grins. “Good choice. I like you.”

Camila’s breath catches when Lauren says _I like you_. “I- um, good. I mean- I like you too.”

Lauren sends her another adorable, toothy smile, and Camila doesn’t know how she’s ever going to relax around this girl. Jesus _Christ_ , she’s so fucking gorgeous.

“Anyways, Walz, get over there with Ally and Lauren. This is Norminah’s cuddling couch,” Dinah says, nudging her. “Don’t worry, they don’t bite.”

“No, just,” Camila pauses with a frown. _“Walz_?”

“Well, yeah,” Dinah shrugs, “been working on a nickname for you for a while, and you’re always hugging people like a koala. Walz sounds like that.”

Camila laughs. “Alright then, I’ll take it.”

Her relaxed demeanour is completely shattered when she realises she’ll have to sit next to Lauren, because Ally is on the other side of the couch, and the only spot left is in the middle. There’s no way her heart will calm down.

She shakily sits down, and as she gets herself comfortable, her thigh brushes against Lauren’s. She blushes and pulls away, but Lauren doesn’t seem to notice, so she relaxes a little. As much as she can do when the hottest girl ever is sat next to her.

They’re watching an episode, Dinah making dumb jokes all the way through, when Lauren speaks and Camila melts, because she’s never going to get used to that raspy voice. “Hey, Mani, are we getting drinks?”

“Oh,” Normani stands up and nods, “sure. Anyone want a drink?”

Lauren grins mischievously. “I’ll have a beer.”

Normani laughs. “I’ll give you one if you really want one.”

“Oh,” Lauren blinks in surprise and then smiles. “Hell yeah. Cracking open a cold one with the girls.”

Normani rolls her eyes, and Camila laughs a little, before she turns bright red and looks down at her feet. She hadn’t meant to laugh. She looks up, and Lauren is smiling at her, and it makes Camila blush even more.

“I’ll get you a beer,” Normani sighs, “Mila, you want anything?”

“Um… sure,” Camila nods, “just a coke, please.”

“Alright,” Normani nods. “Ally?”

“I’m good,” Ally smiles at her, “I’ll get something later when we’ve had our food.”

“Okay,” Normani nods, and Dinah turns her drink offer down, so she disappears into the kitchen.

Camila decides to be brave and talk to Lauren again. “Are you- uh, getting a full pizza?”

“Yeah,” Lauren nods, “whatever I don’t eat, Chris will have later.”

Camila’s heart sinks. She has a boyfriend. “Chris?”

“My brother,” Lauren says, and Camila’s heart soars again. _God_ , she’s never felt this jittery around a girl before. “I have two siblings. I’m the oldest, then Chris, and then Taylor.”

“Oh,” Camila replies, and it takes her a few seconds to remember that she has a younger sibling. “I have a little sister. Her name is Sofi. She constantly makes me play with her and she outed me to my parents.”

Lauren laughs. “For real?”

“Yeah,” Camila nods, her stomach fluttering when she realises that _she_ made Lauren laugh. “She announced at dinner that I was going to marry a girl and she couldn’t wait to go to the wedding.”

“That’s adorable,” Lauren says, “Your parents were cool with it though, right?”

“Oh, yeah,” Camila nods, “they sat me down later and told me they didn’t care and they’ll always support me, so… they were amazing.”

“I told my siblings first too,” Lauren says, “well… one of them found out by accident. Chris burst into my room one day when I thought everyone would be out for hours and I had a girl over. Thankfully we were just kissing.”

Not liking the idea of Lauren kissing someone that _isn’t_ her, Camila has to hide those thoughts. Besides, she’s happy that Lauren isn’t straight. “That must’ve been awkward.”

“It was,” Lauren laughs, “I had to explain everything when I’d much rather have been doing something else. But after that I told my whole family. I was always worried about what they’d say, but it was fine. Um, if you don’t mind me asking, what do you identify as?”

“Oh, I’m gay as hell,” Camila says, “I’ve known ever since I was a kid.”

“That’s lucky. I realised when I had a crush on a girl for the first time and then I freaked out and pushed her away,” Lauren says, “and _then_ I went through a ‘look how straight I am’ phase.”

Camila laughs a little. “Safe to say I’ve never had that phase.”

“Laur, here,” Normani passes Lauren a beer, and the doorbell rings as she gives Camila her coke. Dinah jumps up to get it. “Nice to see you two have hit it off.”

Camila _swears_ Normani sends her another knowing look, but she shrugs it off as Lauren speaks. “Yeah. We’re bonding over coming out stories and gay panic.”

Normani rolls her eyes and goes to help Dinah with the pizzas, and Camila smiles to herself. The hot girl _likes_ her.

When she’s given her pizza, Camila falls silent, and listens to the other girls’ conversation, occasionally humming to let them know she’s still listening.

It seems like her mom comes to pick her up way too quickly, but she says goodbye to all of the girls, getting hugs from Dinah, Normani and Ally, and a little nod and a smile from Lauren.

Even after her shower and she gets herself all cuddled up, trying to get to sleep, she can’t get the image of Lauren out of her head.

-

“Do you guys want to come over?”

Camila regrets the words once she says them, but Dinah and Normani grin.

“Sure,” Dinah says, “is this a _meet the parents_ thing?”

“It’s a _meet my mom_ thing,” Camila says, before adding the part she’s been nervous about. “And- um, Ally and Lauren are invited too.”

Camila sees Normani’s smirk. “Sure. I’ll text them.”

Camila watches as Normani sends them a text. She hopes it’s not too weird – she’d met Ally and Lauren a second time, too, and she’s sure she can class them as friends now. Besides, it’s nothing big. It’s not like she’s asking Lauren out on a date.

(Even though she really, _really_ wants to.)

“Ally’s in,” Normani says, “but Lauren hasn’t replied yet.”

“Knowing her, she’s turned her phone off to do her schoolwork,” Dinah shrugs, turning to Camila with a grin. “Like I said, _total nerd_.”

“No, wait, she replied,” Normani says, and Camila looks up hopefully, “oh, she can’t.”

Camila deflates. She kind of hoped that Lauren would join. It’d give her an excuse to talk. Maybe flirt, too. Even though she’s hopeless at that.

Normani grabs her hand and squeezes it comfortingly. “Sorry, Mila. I can give you her number if you want.”

Camila smiles, but quickly tries to look neutral, because she doesn’t want to look too eager. “Okay. If you want. I don’t mind either way.”

Normani laughs a little. “I’ll text you it.”

“Thanks,” Camila smiles gratefully. She really hopes Lauren won’t be weirded out by it. “I don’t want her to think I’m like, some stalker.”

Normani laughs. “She won’t. I asked her if it’s okay and she said yes.”

“Oh,” Camila nods, but in her head she’s running through all of Lauren’s possible reactions. What if she thinks Camila is weird for wanting her number?”

“Mila,” Normani laughs. “Don’t worry about it. Laur likes you.”

“How do you know?” Camila blurts out without thinking. “I mean, um…”

Normani laughs. “She told me. She thinks you’re cool.”

“She thinks I’m cool?” Camila repeats with a smile. “I mean, um… that’s- she’s cool too.”

“Yeah, really cool, according to you,” Normani laughs.

“Who’s cool?” Dinah asks, looking up from her phone. “Sorry, got distracted by how cute I am.”

Normani rolls her eyes. “Don’t worry about it.”

Camila feels like she should take that advice, too. She doesn’t need to worry. If Lauren thinks she’s cool, then she’ll say yes to a different thing. Camila just has to ask in advance.

She’s going to hang out with Lauren. Maybe even alone.

She just has to put away her inhibitions and _ask_ , because Lauren will say yes. Lauren likes her.

-

Camila stares down at her phone, at the message she’s been typing and erasing for the past ten minutes. After another split second decision, she hits send on the most basic message ever, and instantly regrets it.

**_Camila (7:27PM): hi lauren_ **

**_Camila (7:27PM): it’s camila i meant to put that in my first message_ **

**_Lauren (7:31PM): Hey :)_ **

**_Camila (7:31PM): mani gave me your number she said it was okay_ **

**_Lauren (7:32PM): Yeah, she asked me about it, don’t worry._ **

**_Lauren (7:32PM): What’s up?_ **

Camila sucks in her nerves and decides to just _ask_. Besides, it’s something fun, and she thinks Lauren will like the idea.

**_Camila (7:32PM): well since you can’t come over with the other girls i was wondering if you wanted to hang out a different day_ **

**_Camila (7:33PM): my mom won this go karting thing in a raffle and she doesn’t want to go so she gave the tickets to me and i was wondering if you’d want to go_ **

**_Lauren (7:36PM): I’d love to go with you, Camila, but I can’t._ **

Camila’s mood comes crashing down. She knows what this means. She’s asked Lauren if she can go, and Lauren had said no, without even knowing when it would be. It _means_ that Lauren doesn’t want to spend time with her.

**_Camila (7:37PM): but you don’t know what day it would be_ **

**_Lauren (7:37PM): I’m sorry, but I can’t._ **

**_Camila (7:38PM): that’s fine then_ **

**_Camila (7:38PM): i’ll just ask dinah_ **

**_Lauren (7:40PM): I’m sure she’d love that._ **

Camila sighs. She wanted to go with _Lauren_. Even though Dinah is one of her best friends, she thought go karting would be a cute, fun thing to do. Maybe even in a date context.

She thought that Lauren would like it.

She sighs. _I guess I’ve got to go back to the drawing board._

-

When Camila arrives at Dinah’s for a movie day, Lauren is already there, sat on the couch in the spot closest to the TV. “Hi.”

“Hey,” Lauren smiles at her, and Camila’s stomach flutters. “What’s up?”

“Nothing,” Camila murmurs, biting down on her bottom lip. “How are you?”

Before Lauren can reply, Dinah speaks. “I’m going to go and pick up Ally. Mani should be here soon.”

“Oh, okay.” Lauren replies. “See you soon.”

Camila nods in reply and sits down on the couch, keeping a distance from Lauren. “So, um… yeah, how are you?”

“I’m okay,” Lauren tells her. “I haven’t seen you for a while. You didn’t come to Mani’s to sleep over.”

“Mani had a sleepover?” Camila frowns. She hadn’t had an invite to that. “I didn’t know.”

“Oh,” Lauren looks down at her lap, and then laughs a little. “Sorry. So how’s your-”

“Do you want to hang out this weekend?” Camila blurts out. “Like, um… my mom and I are taking my little sister out to help her ride a bike, and it’d be fun to have a friend to ride with while my mom does all of the hard work.”

Lauren stares at her for a moment, before her face cracks into a grin. Camila’s heart soars. _She’s going to say yes_. “You’re not going to believe this, but I don’t know how to ride a bike.”

Camila deflates. “You’re joking.”

“I’m actually not.” Lauren laughs. “I never learned.”

“Oh,” Camila sighs, still not entirely believing her, but forcing a laugh. “That’s funny.”

(She still takes Normani to the side when she arrives and asks if Lauren knows how to ride a bike, feeling a little better when Normani confirms that _no_ , she can’t.)

-

Camila nervously approaches the beautiful green eyed girl, who is still on the couch, even though the other girls had hurried off upstairs to get something. She’s already decided with herself that she’s not going to bother again if Lauren turns her down. “Hey, Lauren?”

Lauren smiles at her. “What’s up?”

“Um, so,” Camila takes in a shaky breath, “I have to- I have to babysit my little sister tomorrow night, and my mom said I can have a friend over… and I figured, since you haven’t been over yet, and the other girls have… maybe you’d want to come?”

Lauren’s smile doesn’t waver, but it has a hint of sadness to it. “Sorry, Camila, I don’t think I can.”

“You wouldn’t be like, intruding or anything,” Camila continues, hoping she can spend time with Lauren. Once she puts Sofi to bed, Lauren would be all hers. “You can sleep in my room and stuff, and-”

“Camila, I’m really sorry,” Lauren sends her an apologetic smile, “I’d love to, but I can’t.”

“I shouldn’t have asked you so short notice,” Camila sighs, sitting down on the couch next to Lauren. Lauren shifts a little. “If I’d sucked it up and asked you a week ago-”

“I still wouldn’t be able to come,” Lauren replies. She takes Camila’s hand and squeezes it. “Like I said, I’m sorry. Maybe next time.”

Camila sighs. She always gets rejected by Lauren. Did Lauren just not like her? Is that why she always says no?

“Okay,” Camila answers, and she rests her head on Lauren’s shoulder, before she recoils quickly, realising what she’s done. Her heart pounds when Lauren pulls her back. “Next time.”

She opens her mouth to ask something else, but Dinah walks back in with a grin. “I found my DVD.”

“You know it would’ve been way easier to just search something on Netflix, right?” Lauren laughs. “Or did it have to be that specific movie?”

“It had to be this one,” Dinah says, looking at Camila, “she hasn’t seen it before and that’s a problem. Mila’s about to lose her _The Heat_ virginity.”

Camila laughs, but doesn’t move from where she’s sat with Lauren, and her heart pounds when she feels the older girl take her hand. “Alright. Where’s Ally and Mani?”

“Getting snacks,” Dinah answers, “Either of you want anything?”

Camila nods, and asks for popcorn, a movie watching essential, and Lauren grins at her. “It’s like you read my mind. Popcorn and… coke, please.”

Dinah nods, and heads out of the room again, leaving the DVD on the arm of the couch next to Lauren. Camila nods at it. “Aren’t you going to put that in the player?”

Lauren looks confused for a moment, and then shakes her head. “Nope. Dinah picked it, she can put it on.”

Camila laughs. “I’m like that, too.”

Lauren hums, and picks up her phone. Camila’s stomach drops when she sees Lauren’s lock screen. It’s a picture of her and another girl, stood on the beach. They’re kissing.

The picture isn’t there for long, because Lauren unlocks her phone and checks her Tumblr, but clearly, Lauren had seen her staring, because she answers the question that’s going through Camila’s mind.

“Her name is Lucy.”

“Oh,” Camila answers, trying to get the picture of Lauren kissing another girl out of her head. “Um… is she your girlfriend?”

“She was.” Lauren murmurs, going back to her home screen, which is another picture. This one, Lauren isn’t in. It’s just the girl. “She’s beautiful, isn’t she?”

“Um, yeah,” Camila replies, a little shocked at how sudden Lauren’s mood change was. But then she takes a proper look at the girl, and her eyes widen. “Wait, I’ve seen her. She’s- she has a memorial… up at school.”

“Yeah,” Lauren swallows and looks down at her lap. “She… she passed away about a year ago.”

Camila squeezes Lauren’s knee comfortingly. “I’m really sorry that happened, Lauren.”

“Yeah, well,” Lauren shrugs, and Camila sees her wipe at her eyes. “Sorry, I don’t mean to be a downer, I’m just-”

“No, it’s understandable, honestly,” Camila replies, pulling Lauren in for a hug. “It sucks that you lost her.”

Lauren hums, and Camila thinks back to the question she’d wanted to ask Normani when she saw the memorial. _How did she die?_ There’s no way she’s going to ask Lauren that, even if she is curious. No, that’s a question she’ll have to find the answer to herself.

Before she can say anything else, the girls walk back into the room. Normani passes Lauren a bowl of popcorn, and Lauren keeps it on her lap, because Camila is close enough to her to grab some if she wants it.

Camila enjoys the movie, even though she has other things on her mind, like _what happened to Lucy_ and _why won’t Lauren spend time with me_. She knows it’s dumb to be hung up on why Lauren has rejected her a few times, and maybe it literally _is_ just because she’s actually busy. She decides to plan a day out with the girls – that way, maybe Lauren will be more inclined to come.

“Hey guys?” Camila asks once the movie ends. “We should all go swimming one day. There’s a waterpark nearby that I want to go to.”

There’s a general murmur of agreement, but Camila notes that Lauren stays silent. After that, she excuses herself to the bathroom, and when she comes back, Lauren is gone.

“Where’d Lauren go?” Camila looks around in case she’d just moved couches.

“Home,” Normani answers. “Her mom arrived literally just after you left the room. She has a thing tonight, so she had to go.”

“Oh,” Camila can’t help but feel at least a little disappointed, but she tries to hide it. She sits down on the couch next to Dinah, and looks at Lauren’s empty space. The seat she was in is still reclined, almost like she’s still there, just invisible.

Dinah shifts closer to her and whispers, “I know you’re crushing on her.”

Camila chokes, and shakes her head quickly. Ally frowns at her. “Are you okay, Mila?”

“She’s fine,” Dinah answers for her, “but I promised her mom I’d have her home in half an hour, so we’d better set off.”

Dinah ushers her out to the car, and once they’re alone, Camila turns to her with a frown. “I’m not crushing on Lauren.”

“Don’t bother lying,” Dinah rolls her eyes. “I can tell. Plus, Mani and I gossip about it. We think it’d be good for her, anyway. If you asked her out.”

“I’ve asked her to hang out a few times,” Camila sighs. “She always says no.”

Dinah sighs a little. “I’ll talk some sense into her.”

“Well, she’ll come to the waterpark, won’t she?” Camila asks. “That’s why I suggested it as a group thing-”

“She won’t come to that.” Dinah interrupts her. “Have you invited her over to your place?”

“Yeah,” Camila nods. “I asked her if she’d come over and babysit Sofi with me. And the last time I asked was when I invited you guys over. And I’ve asked her to the movies, and she said no.”

Dinah sends her a small smile. “I’ll talk to her.”

“Please don’t,” Camila replies, “I don’t want her to know I like her.”

“Fine,” Dinah sighs. “I won’t.”

Dinah lied.

The second she drops Camila off, she drives straight to Lauren’s house. Not bothering to knock, she opens the front door, which is thankfully unlocked, and walks straight down the hall to Lauren’s room.

“Jauregui, listen the fuck up.”

Lauren, who is laid on her bed, reading a book, looks up in surprise. “What the fuck, Dinah?”

“Stop saying no to things,” Dinah crosses her arms and glares. “You need to stop moping.”

“I’m not moping?” Lauren frowns at her. “Is this about Camila?”

“Yeah, it is.” Dinah says. “You’re alienating a new friend because you’re a fucking pussy. You’re upsetting her every time you say no, and she’s going to think you don’t like her.”

“Look, I know she has a crush on me, okay?” Lauren sighs. “I _know_ , alright? But when she finds out, she’s not going to- she’ll look at me differently and I don’t want that.”

“Oh my god, Lauren, she wouldn’t care,” Dinah sighs. “Camila is the one person who wouldn’t care.”

“You can’t know that,” Lauren huffs and looks back at her book. “If you’re going to lecture me, save your breath. I’m not telling her.”

Dinah glares down at her friend. “Maybe I will.”

“No you fucking won’t.” Lauren calls her bluff. “You’d never do that.”

“Look, just… say yes next time Camila asks you do to something,” Dinah replies, “I know you can’t come swimming with us, but lighten up and at least go over to the girl’s house.”

“She’d want me to sleep over,” Lauren counters. “I can’t do that.”

“You could. Me, Mani and Ally have all been there.” Dinah points out. “Her house is like yours, basically.”

“Mani, Ally and I,” Lauren corrects automatically. “Anyway, I just can’t, Dinah. I see her with you guys, anyway. It’s not like I don’t spend time with her.”

“It’s different and you know it,” Dinah argues with her. “Look, I’m not going to force you to tell her. I think it’d be a good idea, but in the end, it’s up to you. Try not to make the wrong choice.”

With that, Dinah turns on her heel and walks out of the room, leaving Lauren alone with her thoughts.

-

Camila sighs, and checks her texts to see if Dinah, Ally or Normani had replied to her. If Lauren hadn’t rejected her again – shed texted her last night and asked if she wanted to go shopping – she’d be hanging out with her right now. She sighs, and keeps walking, trying to clear her mind, but her eyes widen when she walks past a restaurant, and she _swears_ she sees Lauren inside.

She diverts her path, and goes into the restaurant, ignoring the _wait here to be seated_ , and realising that _yeah_ , she had seen Lauren after all. She’s at a table with two others who’re seated across from her, their backs to Camila.

“Laur?”

Lauren looks up, and her eyes widen so much that they look like they’re about to pop out of their sockets. “Camila?”

“Lauren, who’s this?”

All at once, Camila notices the two other people at the table with Lauren. Lauren looks at the woman who’d spoken and says, “Um, mom, dad, this is Camila. She’s a friend of mine.”

“Nice to meet you, Camila,” The woman, Lauren’s mom, smiles at her. “You can join us if you’d like. I’m surprised Lauren hasn’t brought you over before.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t want to intrude,” Camila says, “I just thought I saw Lauren through the window and wanted to say hi.”

“Well, hi,” Lauren answers, and gives her a look that says _you can go now_. It stings a little. “Is that all?”

“Uh, actually, Lauren, I kind of wanted to talk to you,” Camila says. “You didn’t answer my text after you said no to hanging out, and-”

“I’ll answer it later,” Lauren interrupts, giving her a hard look that’s almost like a glare. “When I’m not having dinner with my parents.”

Before Camila can say _okay, sorry, I’ll go_ , Lauren’s mother sends her daughter an encouraging smile. “Go and talk to your friend outside. We’ve only just ordered, so you’ll have plenty of time.”

Lauren seems to have a silent standoff with her mother, before apparently losing. Instead of getting up and walking around to Camila to join her outside, she stays sat down. She navigates herself around the table, and Camila stares at her in shock.

Lauren Jauregui is in a wheelchair.

“Well?” Lauren huffs, wheeling past her towards the door. “Come on then.”

Camila follows, numb with shock, and she’s completely forgotten the angry rant she had prepared. She can’t think of anything at all. When she’s hit by the cool air as they get outside the restaurant, she’s still completely frozen.

Lauren breaks the silence. “It’s rude to stare, you know.”

“Sorry, um,” Camila diverts her gaze and looks anywhere but Lauren. “I- I didn’t… when did this happen? Did something happen you didn’t tell me about, because I’ve-”

“Look, just tell me what you wanted to tell me and leave,” Lauren interrupts her, “I’m not in the mood for questioning.”

“Um, well,” Camila blinks in shock, “I kind of… um, had this whole… angry rant prepared…”

Lauren raises her eyebrows. “Angry rant?”

“Well, um…” Camila blushes and scratches the back of her neck. “It’s more like… I was upset at you, okay? Because I was constantly making an effort and even though you were nice to me, it feels like… it feels like you don’t like me or want to be friends at all.”

Lauren’s hard glare softens, until eventually, she’s not glaring at all. “You think I don’t like you?”

“I kind of… got the impression when you’d always say no to spending time with me.” Camila murmurs. “I’m sorry, okay? I’ll back off.”

She turns to walk away, sighing to herself. If Lauren doesn’t want to be friends, there’s nothing she can do about that.

“No, wait, Camz,” Lauren calls after her, and Camila tenses at the nickname. _Camz_. Nobody has ever called her that. “Just… don’t do that, okay? Don’t leave. I can’t… I can’t explain now, since, you know, I’m at dinner with my parents, but… come over later. Please.”

Camila turns around and looks at Lauren in shock. “You want me to go over to your house? Are the girls going to be there?”

“No,” Lauren shakes her head. “Just us. I promise you I’ll explain everything. I’m sorry for… being kind of bitchy in there.”

“No, it’s okay,” Camila assures her. “Just… how come nobody told me you’re in a wheelchair?”

Lauren sighs and looks away from her. “I’ll explain that later. I’ll text you my address, okay?”

“I- um… okay,” Camila nods, before she leans down and gives Lauren a hug. “Sorry for interrupting your dinner.”

Lauren hugs her back, and Camila feels her sigh against her. “It’s fine, Camila. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

“Yeah,” Camila bites down on her bottom lip, and instinctively, goes to get the door for Lauren. “I’ll… see you later.”

Lauren gives her one last look before going back into the restaurant, and Camila is left with a thousand questions spinning around her head.

-

When Camila arrives at Lauren’s house, she’s incredibly nervous.

She follows Mrs Jauregui’s directions to Lauren’s room, and knocks on the door. When she hears the familiar husky voice, her stomach flips and she walks in.

Lauren is on her bed, her computer on her lap and one earbud in. When she spots Camila, she pauses whatever she’s watching and pushes her laptop aside. “Hey. I figured it’d be you. Nobody else knocks.”

Camila nods, awkwardly glancing around the room. She spots Lauren’s wheelchair next to her bed and her heart constricts a little. “I like your room.”

“Thanks.” Lauren replies, and pats the spot next to her on her bed. “Come sit.”

Camila does as she says, and sits down on Lauren’s bed next to her. Without thinking, she grabs Lauren’s hand, and goes to pull away, but Lauren keeps it gripped in hers. “So- um…”

“Camila,” Lauren sighs, “just ask.”

Camila blurts out the first thing on her mind. “Why’d you call me Camz earlier?”

Lauren surprises her completely and bursts out laughing. “Really, Camila? Oh my fucking god.”

“What?” Camila frowns. “What’s so funny about that?”

Lauren takes a few seconds to compose herself. “It’s just… you find out that one of your friends is paralysed and the first thing you ask is _why did you call me by a nickname?_ ”

“That was just… on the forefront of my mind, okay?” Camila defends herself with a pout. “Answer my question, anyway.”

“Because that’s what I call you in my head and it slipped out,” Lauren replies, still laughing to herself a little. “It’s a nickname. Dinah has like, eight hundred for everyone and you never question her.”

“That’s just Dinah, though,” Camila shrugs, trailing off and resting her head on Lauren’s shoulder. “Anyways… next question. Are we friends?”

“Yeah,” Lauren answers immediately. “We’re friends.”

“Why did you always say no to me, then?” Camila asks. “When I wanted to spend time with you?”

“Partly because a lot of the things you asked me to do required, uh… _the use of my legs_.” Lauren says, and Camila feels pretty guilty. “It’s okay, you didn’t know. And also because… I didn’t want you to know. I didn’t want you to look at me differently. Even coming over to your house for a sleepover would’ve ended up in you finding out when I wouldn’t be able to get up to your fucking bedroom.”

“I wouldn’t look at you differently,” Camila promises her. “I still- um… can you not… move them at all?”

“No,” Lauren stares down at her legs and sighs. “Look, I’m okay though. It’s been a year, I’m used to it.”

Camila asks the big question. “What happened?”

Lauren swallows and squeezes Camila’s hand. “Um… it was after school one night. I used to go to your school, but… I couldn’t go back after... well, I could’ve I just- I couldn’t face everyone. But it was a Friday. And Fridays were always date nights for me and Lucy. She picked me up after softball practice and we went to our favourite restaurant for dinner, and after that, we diverted from our usual routine and went for a walk on the beach. That was when those pictures – my phone wallpapers – were taken.

“After messing around on the beach, we headed back to the car, and we were going to go back to her place.” Lauren continues. “We never made it there. A drunk driver collided with us. I got out, but Lucy… Lucy was killed.”

Camila lets out the breath she didn’t know she was holding. “Lucy was killed and you- you were paralysed.”

“Yeah,” Lauren murmurs. “I’ve- I’ve accepted it now, but… god, Camz, you should’ve seen me in the hospital. I woke up two days after the accident, and the first thing I realised was that I couldn’t feel anything below here.”

Camila watches as Lauren squeezes a point in her upper to mid-thigh. “Lauren…”

“It was like… it was like my whole world had ended. The thing is, I didn’t even think about the big things.” Lauren tells her. “All I thought was _Lucy won’t ever tickle my feet to annoy me again._ And that’s when I went into hysterics, because I didn’t know what the hell had happened to her.”

Camila pulls her friend in for a tight hug. “I’m so fucking sorry, Lauren.”

“Yeah.” Lauren murmurs. “Big day for me. Lost my legs and my girlfriend.”

“Is there any… like, physical therapy, or…” Camila trails off. “I don’t know.”

“No,” Lauren shakes her head. “It’s permanent. I’ll be in my chair until I die.”

“Lo,” Camila holds Lauren tightly, because she can’t comprehend that. “I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Lauren turns to look at her and sends her a small smile. “Camz, the last thing I want is pity. That’s why I didn’t tell you. And… look, I’m really sorry for saying this, but I thought maybe you wouldn’t like me anymore.”

Camila frowns. “Lauren, I’ll always want to be your friend-”

“Not what I meant.” Lauren cuts in. “I know you have… feelings for me. And that… that felt good. To have someone look at me like people used to. I’m not going to lie… before the accident, I was pretty popular, but the only person I had eyes for was Lucy. But suddenly, I’m not _Lauren Jauregui, softball captain_ anymore, and people didn’t care.”

“Oh,” Camila’s heart sinks, because that basically confirms that Lauren doesn’t like her back. “Well, um… you’re welcome, I guess.”

Lauren laughs a little. “I never thought I’d ever have feelings for anyone other than Lucy. I was just worried that… if you found out I wasn’t physically able to sweep you off your feet, you wouldn’t want to be with me. And that’d suck. Because I really fucking like you.”

Camila stares at her in shock, not sure she heard that right. “You- you like me?”

“Yeah, Camz,” Lauren nods. “I do. I’d really like to take you out some time.”

“Oh my god,” Camila stares at her, “you’re asking me out?”

“Yeah,” Lauren confirms, clearly trying not to smile. “I’m asking you out.”

Camila beams, and nods so much she feels like she’s giving herself whiplash. “Yes, yes, yes! I’d really like that.”

“Good,” Lauren smiles. “I kind of thought you’d say no to get me back for all those times I rejected you.”

“Hell no,” Camila shakes her head. “You asked me out! Lauren, I’ve had a crush on you since I _saw_ you. I’m not passing that up, not even as a joke.”

Lauren squeezes her hand. “You’re adorable.”

Camila blushes at Lauren’s compliment, and squeezes her friend’s hand back. After a few moments of silence, Camila says, “if you could go back, and stop the accident from ever happening… would you?”

“Yes, but not for myself,” Lauren answers. “For Lucy. She didn’t deserve to have her life cut short like that. But also no. If… if Lucy had gotten out okay, even if we were still in the accident and I ended up hurt, I’d be okay with that. It brought me closer to the girls again.”

Camila frowns. “I thought you guys had been best friends for years.”

“We have.” Lauren answers. “But we drifted apart when we started high school. I made new friends, mostly the other softball girls and Lucy’s friends. The girls didn’t really approve of them and we had a fight in late sophomore year. Didn’t talk again until my senior year when the accident happened.”

Camila hums in reply. “What was the fight about?”

Lauren laughs. “It’s going to sound so dumb to you, but- uh, they thought that Lucy and her friends were getting me into drinking and drugs and pressuring me, but they weren't. I didn't do anything like that. The girls argued that I was changing in negative way.”

“Were you?” Camila asks. “Like, the drinking and drugs thing.”

“I didn't abuse it… everyone drinks underage,” Lauren rolls her eyes, “Mani was acting like she never has, when I know she does. Besides, it's not like- the drugs- it was just weed.”

“Still drugs,” Camila mutters, but Lauren doesn't hear her. “You don't do it anymore, do you?”

“No, of course not,” Lauren says, but for some reason, Camila has a feeling that she's not entirely telling the truth. “Anyway, is there anything else you wanted to ask, or can we do something else?”

Getting the vibe that Lauren doesn’t want to keep answering questions, Camila shakes her head. “I’m done asking questions.”

Lauren nods. “Okay. Do you mean that, or are you just saying it because you don’t want to seem like you’re probing?”

“I mean…” Camila sighs. “I have a few more.”

“Okay,” Lauren replies, “ask me, then. I’m not going to get mad at you for asking. Curiosity is natural.”

“Oh, well, um,” Camila shifts uncomfortably. “Why didn’t you tell me you knew? Like, about my feelings. I wasn’t ever planning on telling you, so…”

“Figured it’d be an awkward conversation,” Lauren shrugs, “also, telling you I knew would mean I’d have to admit my feelings too, and I wasn’t sure I was ready for that, since usually when people admit they like each other… things progress. Obviously, I’m ready now, but it took me a while to think a few things over.”

Camila frowns. “What things?”

“Well,” Lauren shrugs, “like… I felt guilty. That I was feeling something for someone that wasn’t Lucy. I felt like I was _cheating_ in a way. It took me a little while to get over that. It’s taken me a long time to move on from her and a part of me probably never will, but I feel like I’m ready to date again.”

Camila’s stomach flips when Lauren sighs, rests her head on her shoulder and loops her arm around Camila’s. “I- um… why do you like me back? I mean… like, your past relationship… she just seems so _cool_. And I’m a total dork.”

“I think it’s cute that you’re dorky,” Lauren smiles at her. “It’s endearing. Like, you’re _so_ different to Lucy, and I think that’s a good thing. It’d be a sign of… I don’t know, mental troubles if I was trying to find someone exactly like her. It’s a good thing that I like your dorky ass.”

Camila beams. “That makes me happy.”

“I’m kind of a closet dork, too,” Lauren tells her, bumping shoulders with her. “Don’t tell anyone.”

Lauren has always seemed so _cool_ to Camila, like she’s a total badass who does whatever she wants, when she wants. “For real?”

“For real.” Lauren confirms. “Like, uh… I’m a coin collector.”

Camila smiles. “Really?”

“Yeah. Do you want to see my collection?” Lauren asks, and the way she looks so enthusiastic about it makes Camila’s tummy do backflips. “Also, you know, if you’ve got any coins from different countries… hit me up.”

“Okay, sure,” Camila says, “show me your coin collection.”

“Alright, uh,” Lauren nudges her, “can you move for a minute? I need to get past you to get in my chair.”

“Oh, right,” Camila nods, and she stands up quickly, tripping over Lauren’s chair and falling on her face. She hears Lauren laugh, and flushes bright red. “I- um… I’m okay.”

Lauren, who has shifted herself to the edge of the bed, holds out a hand. “Here.”

Camila frowns, but takes Lauren’s hand, and her friend pulls her up. Camila smiles in thanks. “Um, thanks.”

“No problem,” Lauren says, and Camila watches as she shifts off of her bed and into her chair in a swift movement. “Anyways, you can sit back down, I’ll grab my coins.”

Camila nods, and sits back down. Lauren rifles through a drawer, and then wheels herself back over to Camila, dropping a book onto her bed and flipping it open.

“I have a fair few,” Lauren says, “mostly foreign currency, though a have a couple of cool nickels and dimes that are apparently worth a lot, but I don’t want to sell.”

Camila watches as Lauren flips through all of the coins, explaining each one and where she got them, and she thinks it’s absolutely adorable. She adores the way Lauren’s green eyes are so bright as she talks about something she loves, even if it’s not something Camila knows anything about.

“This one,” Lauren announces, holding up a nickel, “is my pride and joy. Weird, calling a nickel that, but it’s a 1916/16 Buffalo nickel. It’s worth around three grand. Funnily enough, my mom was the one who found it. She got it as change in a store, and she always gives me the cool coins since she knows I collect, and I don’t think she knew what it was, since the only thing she said to me was _hey Lauren, I got this funny coin today_ , _look, they messed it up, look at the sixteen._ ”

Camila laughs. “You knew what it was?”

“No, actually,” Lauren says, “that’s the fun part of collecting coins. You get to find out what they are. Naturally I went to google and when I saw what it was I freaked out.”

“Why didn’t you sell it?” Camila asks. If she’d got a coin like that, she’d sell it and buy a new guitar. “You could use the money to treat yourself.”

“It’ll be worth even more as time goes by,” Lauren replies, slotting it back into its space in the book and closing it, “the rest of the collection adds roughly another thousand to it but this one is the best. I have another couple of rare nickels and dimes but a lot of it is just normal foreign coins. Like, euros and stuff. I have some fifty pence pieces from the UK that are valuable too. And I want to go back to get one of the new pound coins.”

“Damn,” Camila comments as Lauren puts the collection away. “You’re lowkey rich.”

Lauren laughs. “Not really. I nearly sold the 1919 one after the accident to help my parents with medical bills but they wouldn’t let me.”

Camila doesn’t know what to say to that, and Lauren seems to sense it, so she just smiles and nods towards the door. “Want to watch TV? My mom is the only other person in, and she’s in her and my dad’s ‘office’ – aka where they dump all of their work stuff – grading papers. She won’t bug us.”

“Okay,” Camila stands up and follows Lauren out of her bedroom, feeling a little awkward in the silence. When they arrive in the lounge, she sits down on the couch, and Lauren sends her a mock glare.

“Scoot over,” Lauren says, “that’s my spot.”

Camila does as she says, and watches as Lauren grabs the TV remote from the table and shifts herself from her chair to the couch.

“What’re we watching?” Camila asks, and with a lump in her throat, gets closer to Lauren. “Movie or TV?”

“Up to you,” Lauren says, passing her the control. “You’re the guest. You pick.”

Camila is about to search through the channels for something, but her eyes zone in on the Nintendo Wii by the TV. “Do you have Mario Kart? Or bowling?”

“I have both of those things.” Lauren says. “Are you challenging me? Because I’ve beaten so many people at bowling on the Wii that it says I’m a professional next to my Mii.”

Camila laughs. “Hell yeah I’m challenging you, and I’m also going to kick your ass.”

Lauren scoffs. “In your dreams, Cabello. I’ll be the one doing the ass kicking.”

“Sorry, Laur,” Camila argues, “but that’s kind of impossible. I’m unbeatable.”

“Was that a wheelchair joke?” Lauren narrows her eyes. “Because I’m the only one who’s allowed to make those. Otherwise it’s offensive.”

“Oh, um, sorry,” Camila apologises. She hadn’t intended it to sound like that. “I didn’t mean-”

“Hey,” Lauren nudges her. “I’m kidding. I’m still going to beat you, though.”

Camila cheers up. “Nope. Not happening.”

Lauren rolls her eyes, and starts to shift towards her chair. “Fine. I’m going to set it up and completely _annihilate_ you.”

“I can set it up,” Camila stands before Lauren can get into her chair, and pushes her friend back. “Stay there.”

“You’re the guest, though,” Lauren protests. “I have to-”

“Stay sat there,” Camila interrupts. “I’ll do it. It’s easier for me to just-”

“Did you not hear a word I said upstairs?” Lauren cuts in, and Camila pauses halfway to the TV. “I don’t like pity. I don’t want people doing things for me. I’m perfectly fucking capable of going to the TV and turning the goddamn Wii on. I thought you understood that.”

“I’m- I’m sorry,” Camila murmurs, and her stomach turns to iron. “I’ll- um… I’ll leave you alone I guess…”

Lauren frowns. “I never said I wanted you to do that. I don’t want you to go. I just need you to understand what I’m saying. I can get up and do things. It’s fine.”

“Okay,” Camila sighs. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel like I was pitying you. I- I don’t.”

“Come here,” Lauren pats the spot next to her, and Camila sits down again, her heart pounding when Lauren wraps her arms around her and snuggles her face into her neck. “I’m sorry for being kind of harsh, I just really can’t stand it when people pity me. I’m not mad at you, I promise.”

“Okay,” Camila murmurs, and sighs into Lauren’s shoulder. “I’m sorry I suck at this.”

“You don’t suck,” Lauren assures her. “I know it can take people some getting used to. I remember after it happened, I was hanging out with Dinah, and she got comfortable on the couch and was like _Ralph, go get me a drink_. I said I couldn’t – it was before I’d gotten used to using the chair and it was harder for me to get in and out – and she spent like ten minutes calling me lazy before she remembered.”

Camila laughs. “Yeah, Dinah’s like that.”

“Also, Mani tried to get me to help her with this thing she was choreographing, because I’d help her with that stuff when we were younger.” Lauren lists off. “I’m pretty sure Ally’s the only one that hasn’t forgotten. You know, when I told my own _mom_ about you inviting me to go go-karting, she was like _oh, why’d you say no?_ Like, mom, I can’t drive a go kart.”

Camila cringes. “Sorry for inviting you to do that kind of thing. But- I mean, there were other things you could’ve come to. Like when I had to babysit Sofi.”

“Which would’ve required you finding out,” Lauren points out, “but I’ll come and stay over another night if the offer is still there.”

“You will?” Camila blinks in surprise and Lauren nods. “Sorry, this is weird. You actually wanting to hang out. I can’t get used to it.”

“Well, try your best,” Lauren replies, “because I really like spending time with you. And I’m sorry I doubted you and didn’t tell you straight away.”

“It’s okay,” Camila sighs into Lauren, “I don’t think anything can make me upset right now. You asked me out.”

Lauren snorts. “Better things can happen to you than being asked out by me.”

“Not true since I have a huge crush on you.” Camila points out. “My crushes never work out. The closest thing I’ve had to a relationship was this like, weird fling kind of thing with a friend of mine. We literally never did anything other than kiss and the reason we broke up is because we both felt awkward about it. We figured we should stick to being friends.”

“I had a thing like that once,” Lauren tells her. “When I was like, fourteen, my best guy friend at the time asked me out, and we awkwardly dated for two months. Then I met Lucy and broke up with him. He seemed pretty relieved and thankfully it didn’t fuck with our friendship. We still hang out sometimes.”

“That’s like my friend and I,” Camila says. “Ariana is still one of my best friends. We just act like the whole thing never happened. Um, so… how are we going to go on our date?”

“Oh, well,” Lauren hums to herself. “You’re going to pick me up at seven and I will scream directions at you from the passenger seat of the car to the place I’m going to make reservations at. I’m a backseat driver.”

“I don’t have a car, so…” Camila frowns. “I’ll have to see if my mom will let me borrow hers, but I doubt it.”

“Drive mine,” Lauren says, “she hasn’t been out for a while, so…”

Camila raises an eyebrow. “She?”

Lauren rolls her eyes. “Cars are girls. They just are. And my car is a very pretty girl that I can’t drive anymore. So you might as well do it.”

“Okay,” Camila nods, “and you’re going to book the restaurant?”

Lauren frowns. “How do you know I’m taking you to dinner? I might be making reservations at a bungee jumping place.”

Camila rolls her eyes. “Fine, let me know how I need to dress for that.”

“I was thinking black tie,” Lauren laughs, “but yeah, I am taking you to dinner. Smart casual I’d say for the dress code but I wouldn’t complain if you showed up in your sweats, because then it’d give me an excuse to wear sweats too.”

“Sorry to disappoint but I’m going all out for this,” Camila grins. “I want to look my best for my first date with you.”

“Alright then,” Lauren smiles. “I look forward to it. I bet you’re going to look even more beautiful than you already do. Though, I don’t think that’s possible.”

Camila blushes. “You’re really…”

Lauren smirks. “Really what?”

“Amazing,” Camila sighs happily. “You’re really amazing.”

-

“Okay, so what’s wrong with her?”

Camila rolls her eyes at Ariana. “Nothing.”

“That’s hard to believe,” Ariana argues. “She looks like _that_ and she’s dating you? Come on. Girl’s got to have _something_ wrong. Maybe she has an extra toe.”

“She doesn’t have an extra toe,” Camila sighs. “Is it really that hard to believe that a girl likes me back?”

“When she looks like _that_ , yeah,” Ariana says, and Camila sees her eyes dart down to the picture of Lauren she’d sent in their chat. “Damn. If you weren’t hitting that, I would.”

“I’m not _hitting_ her, Ari. We haven’t even been on our first date yet, but she asked _me_ , which counts for something.” Camila rambles. “Also, you dated me, so judging by your theory, you’ve got to have something wrong with you.”

“We both know we never really liked each other,” Ariana argues. “Anyway, I need to meet this girl and find out if she had a severe bump to the head. Obviously she has if she’s banging you.”

“She’s not banging me!” Camila laughs and shakes her head. “I mean, she was in a car accident, but I don’t know if she hit her head.”

“That’s the only explanation,” Ariana says. “I do need to meet her, and I was planning on visiting soon.”

“I’ll talk to Lauren and see if she’s cool with that, but I don’t think meeting my weird friend from where I used to live is something I want to propose to her until we’ve actually had a date.” Camila answers. “Also I know you’ll try to embarrass me.”

“Naturally,” Ariana laughs. “But I want to meet your other new friends too. Not just your girl.”

“My girl,” Camila murmurs, her heart warm. “That makes me so happy. Hopefully I can make her mine officially after our date.”

“You’re really in deep, huh?” Ariana laughs. “You’ve got to send me cute pictures of you two together. I also need to figure out my best friend intimidation speech.”

“I will,” Camila laughs. “And you don’t need to do that anyway. Lauren won’t hurt me.”

“I still want to know what’s wrong with her,” Ariana sighs, “there’s no way a girl that hot likes you.”

“Night, Ari,” Camila mock smiles, and hangs up on her friend before she can protest.

She sighs, and flops down on her bed, a smile on her face. Lauren likes her and their date is tomorrow.

Everything is so much better. Lauren _likes_ her.

She still can’t believe it.

-

“Are you sure you’re ready for this?”

Lauren pulls away from Normani, blinking. Normani had been doing her makeup for her date with Camila, and they’d mostly just been talking about dumb stuff. This seemed serious.

“What are you talking about?” Lauren asks, grabbing Normani by the wrist as she tries to keep going with her eyeliner. “I’ve been thinking about this for a while.”

“No, I mean,” Normani sighs. “You need to be sure you like Camila. Because she really likes you and I don’t want her to end up hurt because you realised you’re not ready to date.”

“I am ready,” Lauren says, “I wouldn’t have said anything if I wasn’t ready. I like her, Mani. She makes me happy.”

“I don’t want you to date her because you want to move on,” Normani says, “date her because you want to date _her_.”

“I’m not dating her because I’m trying to get over Lucy,” Lauren snaps. “I’m not going to get over Lucy. She was my first love. You don’t get over that. But that doesn’t undermine what I feel about Camila.”

“Lauren-” Normani sighs, “I’m sorry, okay, but you know Lucy wasn’t-”

“Just shut up, Mani,” Lauren argues, “go home. I can do my makeup by myself.”

“Lauren, I didn’t mean to upset you,” Normani says, “it’s just that-”

“Mani,” Lauren stares her down. “Leave me alone.”

“No, you need to hear this.” Normani argues. “Just because you’re still in love with Lucy, doesn’t mean you can take advantage of Camila. She really likes you, and I’m not letting you use her to get over your dead girlfriend who wasn’t even _good_ to you.”

“Shut the fuck up, Mani.” Lauren snarls. “You don’t know _anything_ about that. You weren’t even my friend when I was with Lucy. You don’t know what our relationship was like.”

“I might not have been your friend when you were with her, but that’s the whole point,” Normani argues, “you weren’t you. She made you into something you’re not and got you into drinking and-”

Lauren glares. “You drink.”

“-and smoking and _drugs_.” Normani finishes like she hadn’t interrupted. “There’s a difference between casual underage drinking and _drugs_ , Lauren. Smoking is bad for you and I-”

“Get out, Normani,” Lauren glares at her, “I’m not taking advantage of Camila and if you can’t see that then I don’t want to talk to you. Get out.”

Normani sighs, grabs her makeup and shoves it haphazardly into her bag, before she stalks out of the room. Lauren doesn’t let out a breath until she hears Normani’s car start in the driveway. Then, she sighs, shifts off her bed and into her chair, and goes over to her chest of drawers. She pulls a drawer out and grabs the pack of cigarettes hidden behind it, picking up the lighter she leaves next to her candles.

She goes over to her window and pushes it open, sighing at the gentle breeze on her face, and lights a cigarette, taking a drag. She breathes it out with a sigh of relief. While she doesn’t do it _that_ often, smoking always relaxes her.

She thinks about her date with Camila with a small smile. She’s really been looking forward to it – she’s thought about how adorable Camila is since they’d met – and it’s nice to know that her feelings are actually progressing with someone she feels she’s ready for. She takes another drag of her cigarette and wonders what Camila is doing right now.

Is she nervous? Knowing Camila, probably. She remembers how nervous and jumpy Camila was when they met, and wonders if she’ll be anything like that tonight. Honestly, Lauren is a little surprised that Camila still wants to go out with her; Lauren feels like being with her means limits in the activities they can do. It’s not like she can take Camila swimming or even take her for a drive along the beach like she’d do with Lucy.

The thought makes her stressed, and Lauren takes another drag of her cigarette, breathing it out with a sigh of distress. _Stop thinking about that_ , she tells herself, _you’re fine, you know you are. You’ve accepted it and you’re not letting any little thoughts mess you up._

She pinches her leg just above the knee and sighs, before looking out of the window again and trying not to think about how a year ago, she would’ve been running laps in the garden, training as much as she could for softball. That’s what she misses most, softball. It was the best stress reliever and she loved winning, because they never lost if Lauren had a say in it.

(Which she did, being captain.)

Softball meant a lot to her and opened a lot of doors, doors that are closed again. She lost her scholarship, but thankfully worked her ass off and got an academic one instead. She had Lucy, who she’d seriously thought about how she was going to propose to, and then lost her. She had friends, none of whom came to the hospital to see her. A few of them, she hasn’t seen since that last softball practice Lucy had picked her up from and hasn’t had so much as a text since.

It makes her angry, and she’s decided if she ever sees those people again, she’ll purposely run over their toes.

She finishes her cigarette, and does something she never usually does; lights a second one. Mostly just to spite Normani. It was her choice when she did all of those things with Lucy. She _chose_ to go partying. She _chose_ to smoke. She _chose_ to drink, to try weed, to try the other things offered to her. Sure, Lucy persuaded her sometimes, but in the end, it was Lauren’s decision.

When there’s a knock on her bedroom door, Lauren quickly stamps out the cigarette and throws it out of the window. “Come in.”

The door opens, and the person she’d expected walks in; really, only Camila knocks. Lauren opens her mouth to say hello, but her breath catches on her throat. Camila is wearing a simple black dress that makes Lauren’s heart stop, because _fuck_ , she looks good in black. Her hair is perfectly wavy, flowing down her back, and the rosy blush on her cheeks brings an automatic smile to Lauren’s face.

Camila looks gorgeous, and Lauren is sat there with unbrushed hair and half done makeup. _Fabulous._

“Hi,” Camila murmurs, “I know I’m early…”

“Yeah,” Lauren agrees with her, “but… wow. I didn’t know how much I needed to see you. You’re _gorgeous_ , Camz.”

“Thank you,” Camila’s cheeks turn a darker shade of crimson. “You are too.”

Lauren snorts. “Camz, I haven’t brushed my hair and my makeup isn’t even finished.”

“If getting ready was such an urgent task, then why are you sitting and staring out of the window like some emo?” Camila laughs. “You’re so dramatic.”

“I’m- what- _dramatic_?” Lauren blinks, because she’s nothing of the sort. “I resent that.”

(Camila is kind of right though. She _was_ staring out of the window and dwelling on negative thoughts, but she doesn’t need to _know_ that.)

“See, most people would say _I’m not dramatic,_ ” Camila points out, “but you announce that you _resent_ it.”

“Not my fault I have a big vocabulary,” Lauren defends herself. “I read a lot.”

Camila laughs. “You’re really cute, Lo. Do you want me to help you get ready? Like, with your makeup? I kind of suck at doing it, but… I can try.”

Lauren hums in thought. “I mean… all I really have left to do is my eye makeup.”

“Okay, where do you keep your makeup?” Camila asks, and Lauren points her to the drawer she stuffs everything in. Camila pulls out mascara and eyeliner, and then walks over to Lauren. She coughs, and Lauren feels kind of guilty. “Is it just me, or is it like… really smoky around here?”

After a few moments, Lauren shrugs. “Just you. But we can move over to my dresser.”

Camila nods, and Lauren moves past her to sit by her dresser. Camila pulls the chair in front of Lauren’s, and then gets to work. It’s honestly quite relaxing, even though it doesn’t take long, and Lauren decides that she likes Camila doing her makeup for her.

Then, Lauren decides to brush her hair through quickly to get any tangles out, but other than that, it looks fine, so she turns to Camila with a grin. “Okay. Ready. Let’s go.”

Camila nods, and gestures for Lauren to lead the way, so she does, heading towards the garage. Camila follows after her, and Lauren leads her to her old car. She smiles at it, because she’d worked two whole summers just to buy it, only for it to be sat in her garage gathering dust.

Lauren passes Camila the keys, and then opens the passenger side door, transferring herself from her wheelchair and into the seat. She buckles herself in, and frowns when Camila gets in the car and starts it.

“Uh, Camz…” Lauren stares at her. “Aren’t you going to put my chair in the back?”

“Oh,” Camila’s eyes widen and she jumps out of the car, “sorry, I forgot.”

Lauren keeps the passenger door open and watches as Camila struggles to pick up the chair, and then stares at the door to the backseat. She raises her eyebrows in amusement, waiting for the ball to drop, but for some reason, it doesn’t. Camila just stares at the door to the backseat, which definitely isn’t big enough to fit the chair through, as if she’s trying to widen it with mind control.

Finally, Lauren laughs. “Camz, you fold it.”

“Oh, yeah, I knew that,” Camila lets out a loud _psh_ , “obviously. Um… how do I…”

Lauren reaches over and shows her how to do it, which garners another _yeah, I knew that_ from Camila, who puts the folded chair across the backseat. She goes to get back into the car, but Lauren points out something else.

“So, uh,” Lauren nods to the closed garage door. “You’re just going to drive straight through the door?”

Camila blushes again, and Lauren is kind of having a little too much fun teasing her. Camila pushes the button Lauren tells her to, and the garage door opens for them. She hops back in the car, face still red, and starts to drive.

Lauren smiles at her. “You’re pretty nervous, huh?”

“How could you tell?” Camila mumbles, keeping her eyes on the road. “It’s just… it’s _you_.”

“What about me?” Lauren frowns and when Camila turns to look at her, her chest tightens and she shakes her head, blurting out quickly, “Don’t take your eyes off the road.”

She still has a little residual fear about being in cars, something that probably won’t go away. It’s not as bad with her mom, because she understands that Lauren needs complete focus on the road on her part to stay comfortable.

“Sorry,” Camila murmurs, looking back. “It’s just that… you’re you, and I’m me. I was on FaceTime with my friend the other day, after you asked me out, and she was like _what’s wrong with her?_ Like, I know she was joking, but it makes sense. You look like _that_ , and I’m just here like… mediocre. You know?”

“Camila,” Lauren looks at the girl’s side profile and smiles to herself. “You’re beautiful. I’ve thought so ever since I saw you. But there’s more to liking a person than their looks, and I like everything about you. I like your dorky jokes and how shy you get and how cute and nervous you were when we met. The looks are a bonus.”

“How did you know?” Camila asks, and Lauren frowns, not sure what she’s getting at. “How did you know I liked you?”

“Well, I knew when we met that you at least found me attractive,” Lauren points out. “Like, the way you talked to Dinah, Mani and Ally compared to me was so different. Like, I knew it wasn’t just how you were around new people, because you hadn’t met Ally and you talked to her fine. You were stuttering around me _and_ you talked to me more than you did Ally. Like you were trying to flirt. My suspicions were confirmed when I overheard Mani and Dinah talking about it. Also, you know, I rejected you a gazillion times and you still kept asking.”

Camila blushes. “I thought I was being subtle.”

“Nope,” Lauren laughs. “You really weren’t. But it’s a good thing, because I liked you too. It just took me a while to be sure I was ready. If I wasn’t, it would end up hurting you. I had to be sure.”

“I’m glad you thought it through.” Camila smiles. “I’m glad we’re doing this.”

“Yeah, me too,” Lauren says. “But anyway, you’ve been driving in the wrong direction for like, five minutes. I’m just going to put it into the GPS system so you can follow that and we can still talk.”

“Okay,” Camila smiles, and Lauren types the restaurant into the GPS, pressing _start route_. Camila listens to the first direction, and then hums a little tune to herself. “So, Ari thinks you have head trauma and that’s why you like me.”

“Surprisingly I didn’t get a bump to the head at all in the accident,” Lauren says. “If I did it would’ve killed me. Or at least given me brain damage.”

“That’s what she’s insinuating,” Camila says, “that only a big bump on the head can make someone like me.”

“Well, she’s wrong,” Lauren laughs, “I’m good. Though, I did crack my head open when I was little. Maybe that’s it.”

Camila laughs. “If I wasn’t driving, I’d slap you.”

Lauren mock gasps. “Slapping a disabled person? Camz, you _wouldn’t_.”

“You can’t pull the disabled card when you want to be a little bitch,” Camila laughs, “that’s not how it works.”

“It’s exactly how it works,” Lauren sends her a teasing grin, but Camila can’t see it because she’s too busy watching the road. “Don’t act like you wouldn’t do the same.”

“I don’t know what I would do,” Camila shrugs, “I’m not in that situation. I wonder what I’d do if we swapped bodies for a day.”

Lauren laughs. “You’d better not look at me naked.”

Camila turns crimson, which just makes Lauren laugh more. “Shut up.”

“I’d just play softball if we switched bodies,” Lauren thinks, “but then I’d most likely collapse because you get out of breath after walking for two minutes.”

“Exercise isn’t my thing,” Camila shrugs, “feel free to steal my body for a day and work out for me. It’s the only workout it’ll ever get.”

“Not surprising,” Lauren replies, “eating is the only exercise you get.”

“I can’t believe you were a jock,” Camila murmurs, “I can’t believe anyone is a jock. Like… really? How do you get _joy_ out of sweating and not being able to breathe and all of that gross stuff?”

“It’s more like when you actually _play_ sports,” Lauren points out, “like, working out alone is kind of boring. I ran as a stress reliever, but a lot of people find that kind of thing boring. But when you’re playing a _game_ … it makes it fun.”

Camila pulls a disgusted face. “I hate gym class so much, and they do that kind of thing there. Dodgeball is my worst nightmare.”

“I feel like you would’ve hated me if we’d met before,” Lauren says, “because I was kind of merciless at dodgeball.”

“Yep,” Camila confirms, “in that case, I would’ve hated you. I also would’ve thought you were crazy, gym being your favourite class.”

“Gym isn’t my favourite. Never has been.” Lauren says, “Art always has been. Art and literature.”

“I like literature too,” Camila smiles. “I’ve always been good at it. Books were my best friends as a kid.”

“They still are my best friends,” Lauren smiles. “I read a lot in the hospital because I was stuck there for a while.”

“I’ve never stayed overnight in a hospital,” Camila admits, “you’d think with how clumsy I am, by this point I would’ve. But I never have. I can’t imagine it.”

“It’s weird. I was pretty freaked out when they finally took me off all the painkillers,” Lauren admits, “like, I’m one hundred percent certain that hospitals are haunted since people die there. I would bet my favourite nickel that I saw a ghost there, because I’ve definitely seen a ghost before in a graveyard. It was like this shadow, and it moved past a gravestone, and then I looked away and looked back and it had gone.”

“Wow,” Camila sarcastically replies, “spooky.”

“It was!” Lauren defends herself. “Besides, I bet you’ve never seen a ghost.”

Camila laughs. “I haven’t, so lucky for you, you get to keep your weird nickel.”

“I wouldn’t give it to you anyway,” Lauren pouts, “it’s my favourite. And it’s not _weird_. You know, the most offensive thing anyone has ever said to me was when I found this really cool coin when I got change in a store, and I was short for this one thing they wanted somewhere else and I’d offered to buy it for them, but I didn’t want to use the dime I found, and then they laughed and told me to stop being dumb and use it to pay.”

Camila frowns. “That’s mean. You didn’t end up using it, did you?”

“Of course not,” Lauren smiles, “lucky for me, I found another regular dime in my pocket. Otherwise she would’ve made me pay with it.”

She catches Camila’s small frown, and wonders if she’s thinking about the person Lauren means. _Yes_ , it had been Lucy, but Lauren hadn’t minded that much. It was only a dime, after all. Sure, later she found out that it was a mercury dime, but it was only worth around four dollars anyway.

“Well, if I find any coins I think are weird, I’ll give them to you,” Camila says, “you can add them to your dorky collection.”

Lauren blushes, because it’s cute that Camila is the one teasing for once, but also, her coin collection is _not_ dorky. Even though nobody believes her when she says that. “You like my collection.”

“I think it’s cute,” Camila confirms. “You’re cute. As well as being, you know, intimidatingly attractive that you actually _scared_ me when we met.”

Lauren snorts. “I’m not that intimidating.”

She knows she used to be to a lot of people, but that was when she was relatively popular, softball captain, at all the parties and throwing the best ones, and constantly defending Lucy to anyone her girlfriend had said spoke bad about her. She could intimidate people when she wanted to.

But Lauren’s always been a softie at heart. She’s too much of a dork for people to take seriously, and if they ask her to talk about her interests, you’re either going to get a passionate political rant, a ramble about her favourite books, or a complete talk through of her entire coin collection.

Camila just shrugs. “You were to me when we met. Then you smiled all cutely and it made me melt.”

Lauren laughs. “You’re the cute one.”

“ _Shhh_ , Jauregui, let me compliment you.” Camila laughs. “You’re adorable but you’re also super intimidating. Like, one look and you could kill.”

Lauren snorts. “Nobody has ever called me by my last name except my old softball coach. That’s weird.”

Camila just smiles, and when the GPS announces _you have arrived at your destination_ , she pulls into the parking lot of a restaurant. She beams when she realises where they are. “A Cuban restaurant?”

“Yeah,” Lauren smiles. “Figured it’d be a good idea since we’re both Cubans and that was the first thing we knew we had in common. Perfect for the first date.”

Camila blushes, and parks the car, before she gives the key back to Lauren. “It’s your car, you keep the keys.”

Lauren just shrugs and tucks them into her purse – normally she’d shove them in her back pocket, but she’s wearing a dress, so that’s impossible. She waits for Camila to get her chair out of the backseat, and rolls her eyes and watches in amusement for a few minutes as her date struggles to unfold it.

Eventually, Lauren just laughs and shows her how to do it properly, and Camila blushes and gets it unfolded for her. She shifts herself into it and then holds out her hand. “Come on.”

Camila takes her hand and squeezes it, but lets go so Lauren can push herself towards the restaurant. Lauren has a million thoughts swimming around in her head, but the one she’s most worried about is _oh my god I haven’t been on a first date in years what are the boundaries how do they work oh my god._ She tries to shut her brain up, but it really isn’t working.

Camila holds the restaurant door open for her, and Lauren’s heart does a jump. She’s always liked to be chivalrous – when she and Lucy were on dates, she would always hold open doors and pull out chairs – but it’s nice to be on the receiving end. Deep down, Lauren knows she likes being treated like a princess, but she’d never admit that to anyone.

When they go to the _wait to be seated_ sign, Lauren addresses the wait staff. “We’ve got a table for two booked under Jauregui.”

She pronounces her last name the proper Spanish way instead of how she usually says it, and Camila sucks in a deep breath. Lauren smirks a little, but doesn’t comment on it. Obviously _someone_ likes hearing her speak Spanish. She’s going to save that information for later.

They get led to their table, and Camila pushes a chair aside for Lauren who moves up to the table and stops, picking up a menu and flicking through it. Camila sits down on the opposite side, so Lauren flashes her date a charming smile over her menu.

“What’re you thinking about getting?” Camila asks. “Because when it comes to Cuban food, I want it all.”

“Probably bistec empanizado. It’s like, my favourite thing. My abuela used to make it for dinner when I went over there.” Lauren says. “Nobody can make it like she could. Though, I’m a close second.”

“We should cook together one day,” Camila suggests, “and by that, I mean you help me cook because I don’t know how and should probably learn before college in the fall so I don’t starve.”

Lauren laughs. “Don’t worry, I’ll help you. What’re you wanting to do at college?”

“Music,” Camila answers instantly. “I know it’s not seen as credible, but… it’s all I’m really passionate about.”

“It doesn’t matter if it’s seen as credible,” Lauren answers. “It will be to the people that matter. If you want a career in music then a music degree is obviously the thing you need. Besides, it’s better to chase your passions than do something just because it’s safe.”

“Yeah,” Camila murmurs. “You’re right. It’s just like… I always worry about my future. Too much, probably. All I want to do is music and it’s so hard to get into.”

Lauren smiles at her. “If you really want it, then you’ll get it. I believe in you, Camz. Where have you applied?”

“Juilliard, which I won’t get into. Also Manhattan School of Music,” Camila tells her, and Lauren smiles a little at the locations. “Um, and Stanford and UCLA as like, non-directed schools that still offer that. And I’ve picked a couple of safety schools too.”

“Always a good idea,” Lauren nods, “well, I believe in you. No matter what happens, you’ll figure it out.”

“Yeah,” Camila blushes. “What about you? What schools do you want? I’m assuming you applied, right?”

“I have applied to a few places and last year I got accepted to one on an athletic scholarship,” Lauren says, “but obviously that’s not happening anymore.”

“Laur,” Camila breathes out, and Lauren’s stomach does fifty flips in a row in a matter of nanoseconds at the nickname. “I’m sorry you lost that opportunity. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t-”

“It’s fine, I have an academic one now.” Lauren assures her, “Not all jocks are dumb and I’ve always been more intelligent than athletic. I’m going to NYU in the fall to study literature and politics.”

“Damn,” Camila comments, “I didn’t know I was in the presence of the future President of the United States.”

Lauren laughs. “Yeah, I’m going to charm them all into voting for me and my left-wing policies.”

“You’ve got my vote,” Camila reaches across the table and squeezes Lauren’s hand. “All you have to do is look at the camera during a speech and you’ll put the whole world under your spell.”

Lauren smirks. “That’s the plan.”

Their waiter comes to take their orders, and Lauren smiles sweetly as she orders a bottle of white wine for the table, and he’s so awkward that he barely glances at the fake ID Lauren hands him. Camila stares at her in shock as he scurries off once he’s done.

“You just flirted with him,” Camila points out, “to get alcohol.”

“If you’re not comfortable-” Lauren starts, but Camila shakes her head, so she stops talking.

“You’re _evil_ , Jauregui,” Camila laughs, “he didn’t even look at your ID he was that flustered.”

“Well, it says I’m 22.” Lauren replies, “teenage boy waiters are the easiest targets when you’re using a fake ID. Half of the time they don’t care. But we get wine on our first date so we’ll look like classy adults.”

“Alright, but be warned, I’m a lightweight,” Camila says, “I had one beer at a party my parents and their friends threw back in Cali and I felt drunk.”

“That wears off, trust me,” Lauren assures her, “the first time I ever had alcohol, I got really drunk off not that much because my body wasn’t used to it. Now it is, so I can hold my liquor well.”

Camila laughs a little. “I want to see drunk Lauren. Bet she’s a riot.”

“I haven’t been drunk for a while,” Lauren admits. “Last time I dived out of my chair, attempted to climb a flight of stairs by dragging myself up them and wanted to throw myself down them, convinced that I could fly.”

Camila chokes with laughter. “Oh my god. What made you come to that conclusion?”

“Dinah,” Lauren says, “she was like _what if your other limbs are heightened like when people go blind their hearing is better_ and I was like _oh my god_ and thought it was the best idea ever. We tried to test that theory.”

Camila laughs even harder. “So, long story short, you and Dinah shouldn’t get drunk together, then?”

“Probably safer if we don’t,” Lauren laughs to herself. “But yeah, maybe one day I’ll let you meet drunk Lauren.”

Camila grins. “I look forward to it.”

When their food comes, Lauren is a little comforted by the fact Camila isn’t trying to go slow or act like she doesn’t vacuum up every meal she has. This is the most comfortable she’s ever felt on a first date, probably because she knows Camila and they’ve been friends for almost two months. Even on her first date with Lucy, she felt awkward and didn’t know what to do or say, and was constantly feeling as though she couldn’t say particular things in fear of scaring her off.

With Camila, she’s comfortable. It’s easy and they click and the younger Latina jokes with her about stupid things, trivial stuff that most people worry about on the first date. When they finish their meal, Lauren pays, and she feels Camila watch her with a smile as they leave the restaurant and Lauren is checking over all of the coins she’d gotten as change.

“Oh, this one is cool, look,” Lauren blurts out as they reach the car, and then she blushes, because boring people about coins really isn’t a cool thing to do on a first date. Lucy would’ve told her _it’s just a coin_ , because she wasn’t interested, and Lauren understood that, because most people aren’t.

But Camila smiles and takes the quarter Lauren is holding out, looking it over. “Yeah, it’s printed weird like that nickel.”

“Misprints can be worth a lot,” Lauren replies, reaching down her dress and tucking the coin into her bra. “I’m going to look it up when I get home.”

Camila laughs, and waits for Lauren to get out of her chair so she can fold it and put it in the back. When Camila walks around to the driver’s side and gets in, she breathes out a small sigh. Lauren isn’t sure if it’s a good one or bad one, but Camila elaborates before she can ask.

“I had a lot of fun,” Camila smiles. “Tonight was everything I’d been hoping for.”

Relief floods Lauren’s chest and she reaches over to squeeze Camila’s hand. “I’m glad you had fun. You’ll let me take you out again?”

“No,” Camila shakes her head, and Lauren’s face falls. “I want to organise the next date.”

At Camila’s words, Lauren relaxes. “Okay. That’s good. Back to my place?”

Camila tenses, and Lauren frowns. “Um, yeah.”

“What’s wrong?” Lauren asks. “Are you okay?”

“It’s just, when you go to someone’s house after a date… I’m not ready for that,” Camila says, “Not yet.”

Lauren frowns, but when she realises what she’s talking about, her eyes widen and her cheeks turn crimson. “ _Oh_. No, I meant you dropping me off at home.”

“Yeah, but I have to wait for my mom to pick me up, since she didn’t let me have the car,” Camila points out. “So thought maybe you were implying during the wait…”

“Camz, you’re not getting in my pants on the first date,” Lauren laughs when Camila flushes. “I wasn’t implying that.”

“Okay,” Camila replies, still bright red, “sorry, I made it awkward.”

“You didn’t,” Lauren assures her, “it’s fine. Text your mom – by the time we get back to my place, she’ll be there. Here’s the keys.”

Lauren gives Camila the car keys, and Camila texts her mother, before she starts the car and sets off. The drive back is a comfortable silence, despite the awkward conversation, filled with little hums from Camila as she voices whatever song is stuck in her head. Lauren adores it.

When they finally arrive back at Lauren’s, Camila pulls into the driveway, hopping out to open the garage door, and parks the car. Camila gets Lauren’s chair out of the back, and as Lauren gets out of the car, Sinu pulls up outside.

Camila pushes the button to close the garage door, and they head into the house, by the front door, to say their goodbyes. Camila is awkwardly rocking on her heels, when she glances at Lauren with a shy smile. “I really did have fun.”

“Yeah,” Lauren grins. “Me too. I was thinking maybe next time we could-”

Lauren doesn’t get to voice her suggestion, because Camila leans down, cups her face in her hands and kisses her, effectively cutting her off. Lauren is too in shock to respond, and before her brain can unfreeze and yell _kiss her back, you idiot_ , Camila has pulled away, squeaked out an awkward goodbye, and run out of the front door.

Lauren stares at the door as it closes behind her, and after the shock wears off, a small smile curves her mouth upwards.

_Yeah_ , Lauren thinks _, best first date ever._

-

Camila stares down at her phone, hesitant to press the _call_ button on the contact she’s staring at. She wants to ask Lauren to hang out, and Lauren _had_ said she’d come and sleep over one night, but she’s not sure if Lauren will think it’s weird that she’s asking for a sleepover now that they’re _dating_. Especially since Lauren hadn’t kissed her back.

(Plus, a sleepover might imply things she isn’t ready for, things she doesn’t even know if Lauren can do.)

But, she bites the bullet and presses the call button, regretting it as soon as she does. Naturally, before she can hang up, Lauren picks up.

“ _Hey, Camz,”_ Lauren says, and Camila’s heart flutters. _“What’s up?”_

“Um, hi,” Camila awkwardly replies. Phone calls really aren’t her strong suit. “Are you busy today?”

_“I’m not busy all week,”_ Lauren answers. _“Why?”_

“Well, um, I was wondering,” Camila sucks in a breath, “would you want to sleep over tonight? Like, as a date? I was hoping we could make dinner together and stuff.”

She expects rejection or for Lauren to announce she’s actually busy, or she just doesn’t want to. But, after a moment of pause, Lauren replies. “ _Sure. What time should I come over?”_

“You’re coming?” Camila blurts out without thinking, and blushes when she hears Lauren’s laugh through the receiver. “I mean, um… as soon as possible, really.”

“ _Yeah, I’m coming.”_ Lauren says, still laughing. “ _I’ll see you in like… half an hour? My mom is finishing off grading some papers and then she’ll be able to drive me.”_

“Alright,” Camila nods to herself, smiling, and decides to push conversation. “So, um, what’re you doing?”

_“Not much,”_ Lauren answers, “ _just playing piano to pass the time. What about you?”_

“You play piano?” Camila asks. “That’s cool. I play guitar. And I’m not doing anything.”

_“Yeah, I’ve been playing since I was a kid. I didn’t know you played guitar though, that’s cool,”_ Lauren comments. “ _I sing a little, too.”_

Camila grins. “I do too. Maybe we can play together some time.”

_“Yeah, sure,”_ Lauren answers, “ _anyway, I’m going to ask my mom for a ride. I’ll see you in half an hour?”_

“Yeah,” Camila nods, “see you in half an hour. Bye for now.”

Lauren hums. “ _Bye, Camz.”_

When the line goes dead, Camila lets out a little squeal and smiles to herself. Lauren is coming over for the first time. She looks around her room and her face falls.

_Fuck._ Camila thinks. _I really need to clean my room_.

She spends the half an hour Lauren takes to arrive shoving everything into her closet and pretending that her room is naturally tidy – the last thing she wants is Lauren to think she’s a slob – and she’s hastily making her bed when there’s a knock on the front door and she runs to answer.

She opens the door with a smile. “Hi, Laur.”

“Hey, Camz.” Lauren replies, and Camila moves aside so Lauren can get in. “How are you?”

“I’m… really good, now that you’re here.” Camila answers honestly. “Anyway, I was figuring we could make dinner together. Like, uh, I bought burger patties, so…”

“Alright, sure,” Lauren nods, “I’m alright at cooking, and I’m pretty hungry, so… do you want to cook now?”

“Yeah,” Camila nods, because she’s hungry too. “Um, the kitchen is this way.”

She closes and locks the front door behind Lauren, and takes the older girl’s overnight bag into her room, putting it on her bed. Then, she meets Lauren in the kitchen and sends her friend a smile.

“Are we making fries too?” Lauren asks. “Because you can’t have burgers without fries.”

“Yeah, we’re doing both,” Camila nods, and gets the bag of frozen fries out of the freezer, putting them on the counter. “Um… you should be able to reach if you want to dump a load of fries onto a baking tray and stick them in the oven. I guess I’ve got to grill the burgers.”

“Alright,” Lauren nods, and Camila grabs the two burgers she’d bought out of the fridge, and works on unpacking them. She preheats the oven for Lauren, since Lauren won’t know how to work her oven, and then grabs a pan out of the cupboard.

Lauren puts the fries in the oven, and when Camila turns around, she’s wheeling herself around in circles. “Um… are you stuck or something?”

“No, just bored while you’re staring at those burgers,” Lauren says, coming to a stop next to her. “Why do I feel like you have no idea what you’re doing?”

“Um…” Camila blushes, “that’s because I don’t.”

Lauren rolls her eyes. “Put the pan on the stove.”

Camila does as she says, staring at the little knobs that turn the stove on. “Now what?”

“Turn it on and fry them,” Lauren tells her, and when Camila remains stationary, rolls her eyes. “Come on, you can do it. It’s not hard.”

“Trust me, I can’t do that,” Camila stares at the burgers in the pan. “Me, around an open flame? Not a good idea.”

Lauren huffs as she gets the cheese out of the fridge and wheels over to Camila. “Fine, I’ll do it.”

“Um, Lo, you can’t reach,” Camila points out. “I can _try_ , but I might burn the house down-”

“Camila, just help me up,” Lauren rolls her eyes and reaches for her. “Come on.”

Camila pauses for a moment, helping Lauren out of her wheelchair. When she feels her friend’s weight against her, she tries her best to keep her supported. “What now?”

“Just, um, turn,” Lauren says, “so you’re behind me and I’m facing forwards towards the stove. But don’t drop me, please. I’d rather not fall flat on my ass, thanks.”

Somehow, Camila manages to manoeuvre around Lauren in the aforementioned position. “Okay, and- um… what do I do now?”

“Don’t let go of me, basically,” Lauren says, grabbing the spatula from the counter and turning the stove on. “Otherwise I’ll make sure I fall directly on top of you, since it’ll be your fault if I end up on the floor. I’ll need _something_ to cushion my fall and your ass will work great for that.”

“Great,” Camila sarcastically replies, “I’m sorry if I do drop you. I’m kind of weak.”

“Well, yeah, the most lifting you do is a slice of pizza to your mouth,” Lauren points out, flipping one of the two burger patties. “Wait, are the buns within arm’s reach?”

“Um, yeah, I got them,” Camila says, and she makes sure she twists so she’s supporting Lauren from behind on her left side as she grabs the plate with the burger buns and cheese on and pushes it towards Lauren. Then, she puts her arm back around Lauren’s waist and holds her steady. “I’m sorry you had to do the cooking, Laur.”

Lauren laughs. “Camz, it’s fine. I like to cook. Besides… this is kind of cool.”

“What’s cool?” Camila asks. “Flipping burgers? Because I can send in an application to McDonalds for you if you want.”

“No,” Lauren laughs. “Like… I don’t know… I missed this. Standing up. Being level with everything.”

“Well,” Camila kisses Lauren’s cheek. “Consider me your legs. Besides, this is kind of like a workout for me. Saves me paying for a gym membership, which would never happen anyway because I’d rather pay for pizza.”

Lauren frowns. “You calling me heavy?”

“I- no, of course not, I just,” Camila cuts herself off when she sees the teasing grin on Lauren’s face. “You’re a jerk. You realise I could let you go right now, right?”

“Yeah, but you wouldn’t,” Lauren smiles. “You’re too sweet.”

“I guess.” Camila hums. She watches as Lauren flips the burgers again and presses them down against the pan with the spatula. “How do you know when they’re done?”

“Well, it said on the packaging, but I’ve cooked burgers before, so…” Lauren shrugs, “I just _know_. Don’t worry, you won’t get food poisoning, I swear. Since it’s beef you can have it a little pink in the middle and not die.”

“Oh, well-” Camila cuts herself off when she hears Lauren mumble _fuck_ , and quickly grabs her around the middle, helping her up again. “Sorry. I let go to scratch my nose and forgot to shift my weight.”

“I _swear_ , Camila,” Lauren mumbles. “Drop me again and I’ll poison your burger.”

Camila pouts. “Should I be upset that you’re so readily willing to poison me?”

“You know I wouldn’t _actually_ ,” Lauren answers her with a small smirk. “Probably, anyway.”

Camila rolls her eyes. “So, when’s the last time you did this? You mentioned cooking burgers before. Did the girls get to taste your culinary genius?”

“Um, no,” Lauren shakes her head, and Camila sees a wistful smile on her face. “it was with Lucy. I- uh, was at her place, and her dad was home, and since he’s away a lot, it was like, a big deal. Lucy invited me over for a barbecue and her dad taught us how to grill the burgers and stuff. Long story short, Lucy ended up goofing off and tried to distract me by putting on cheesy music and making me slow dance with her. And even with the distractions, I still managed to cook them right.”

“That’s… that’s cute,” Camila says. She never really knows how to react when Lauren mentions things about Lucy. Camila knows that if Lucy were still alive, Lauren would still be head over heels for her, and wouldn’t spare Camila a glance.

(In fact, sometimes Camila thinks Lauren still _is_.)

“I’m sorry,” Lauren apologises, flipping the burgers another time, “I know you don’t like it when I talk about her.”

Camila tries to play dumb. “What makes you say that? I don’t mind, and I mean, I asked, so-”

“I wouldn’t like it if you talked about your ex, either. It doesn’t make it okay just because she’s not… she’s not here.” Lauren swallows and glances around at her. “It’s understandable that it makes you a little uncomfortable.”

“It doesn’t. You shouldn’t- it’s wrong to let people be forgotten,” Camila tries to explain herself. “Sometimes it’s just like… like you’re still in love with her.”

“I am,” Lauren says, and Camila didn’t think she’d admit that so readily. “She was my first love. A part of me will always feel that way about her. But that doesn’t minimise how I feel about you. It’d be different if… if she was still around, but she’s not.”

Camila’s stomach drops, but not because of Lauren’s confession. “I’m sorry, Lauren. I didn’t mean for it to sound like I’m doubting you.”

“I know,” Lauren squeezes Camila’s hand with her free one, before she puts the burgers onto the buns. “Anyway, order up, Squidward. What do you want on your Krabby Patty?”

“Did you just make a Spongebob joke?” Camila laughs, taking a leap of faith and resting her chin on Lauren’s shoulder and kissing her cheek. “Knew I liked you for a reason. Anyway, what’s the secret formula? Come on, you can trust me.”

“Not telling,” Lauren replies. “You could be Plankton in disguise.”

“If I was I’d have already taken you out and grabbed it,” Camila teases her. “It wouldn’t be that much of a challenge.”

Lauren snorts and puts two slices of cheese on her own burger. “Wow, I’m going to report you for that. I can’t believe you’d beat up a handicapped person.”

“Report me to who?” Camila counters with a laugh. “Mr Krabs?”

“Hell yeah. I’d give him a dollar and he’d fuck you up for me,” Lauren laughs, picking up her plate. “Help me back into my chair. You can assemble your own burger for being so mean.”

“Okay, um,” Camila looks around, trying to figure out how she’s going to get out from behind Lauren while continuing to support her. “I guess I’ll have to move to your front? And resist the temptation to make out with you?”

“Sounds like a you problem,” Lauren comments, “but be quick, we need to get the fries out of the oven before they burn. I can do that once I’m sat down.”

Camila nods, and tries her best to move around Lauren. Her strategy might’ve worked, too, if she hadn’t slipped at the last moment. _Damn vinyl floors and socks_ , Camila thinks as she falls backwards, and because she’s falling, Lauren falls too.

Camila hits the ground with a _thud_ , sprawled out on her back, and not even a second later, Lauren lands face down on top of her.

“Well, you’re the worst pair of legs I’ve ever met,” Lauren says, pushing herself up with her arms so she gives Camila a tiny bit of distance. “I’m firing you.”

“Fine by me,” Camila answers, and when she meets Lauren’s gaze, bursts out laughing. Lauren joins in, and Camila is enraptured by her beauty, because Lauren looks so _fucking adorable_ when she laughs.

“You know,” Lauren says once she calms herself down. “If anyone were to walk in right now, we’d look pretty weird. Also, you’re _so_ lucky I put my burger down before we fell or I’d have yours and let you starve.”

Camila smiles, and pushes herself up a little to kiss Lauren, and this time, Lauren gives her a lot more confidence, because she _kisses back_. “Shift a little so I can get up. Then I’ll help you.”

Lauren nods, and grabs onto one of the cupboard doors by the handle, pulling herself off of Camila and rolling onto her back. Camila smiles, and Lauren pulls her in for another kiss, before she stands up, stretching.

Lauren pushes herself up to sit. “Okay, help me up.”

Camila smirks at her. “Alright. I’ll come back once I’ve had my burger and fries.”

_“Camila_ ,” Lauren pouts at her, and Camila has to resist the cute. “I cook for you and this is the thanks I get?”

“Yep,” Camila replies. “See you later, Laur.”

Instead of walking out of the room, she leans down and grabs onto Lauren, smiling when she feels her friend’s arms wrap around her. She helps Lauren back into her chair, and the older Latina lets out a relieved sigh. “Thanks, Camz.”

“I wouldn’t _really_ have left you, I’m not Dinah,” Camila assures her, brushing Lauren’s hair back and leaning down to kiss her forehead. “Anyway, you should probably get the fries out of the oven before they burn. My burger is going to be cold by now, honestly.”

Lauren bites down on her bottom lip and looks up at Camila. “Okay. Are we sitting outside?”

“Sure,” Camila nods, and she starts putting every extra topping possible on her burger as Lauren gets the tray of fries from the oven. She’s done when Lauren reaches up and puts the fries on the cooling rack, and without thinking, Camila grabs a handful and dumps them on her plate.

Well, more like drops them, considering they’re boiling hot.

“Fuck,” Camila curses, and she dodges around Lauren to put her hand under cold water. “Why did I do that?”

“No idea,” Lauren comments, watching her closely. “But it was kind of funny.”

Camila scowls, keeping her hand under cold water as Lauren goes past her to unlock the back door. “You’re mean.”

“Says the girl who was going to leave me on the floor.” Lauren counters, reaching up and putting some fries onto her own plate with a spatula. She puts the remaining ones onto Camila’s, and then rests the two plates in her lap. “Come on. Your hand should be alright.”

Camila sighs and turns the tap off, picking up the plates from Lauren’s lap. “I’ll carry them. Um, you might need to- uh, get out of your chair again. The back door- um, there’s two steps.”

For a split second, Camila swears she sees a flash of sadness and irritation in Lauren’s eyes, but it’s gone before she can be sure. “Okay, fine, I just need to-”

“Wait,” Camila interrupts her, and she darts past Lauren to put the food on the table outside. Then, she comes back inside, stands in front of Lauren, and leans over. “Okay.”

Lauren stares for a moment before clearing her throat. “Um, not that I don’t love the view, but… why are you sticking your ass in my face?”

“Oh, sorry,” Camila goes lower. “Climb on. I’ll give you a piggyback ride out.”

Lauren looks sceptical. “Are you sure you won’t just collapse? No offence, but I don’t want to end up on the floor for the second time in five minutes.”

“I won’t collapse,” Camila rolls her eyes, “come on, get close enough so you can climb on.”

Lauren does as she says, and when Camila feels her friend’s hands on her shoulders, she smiles. Lauren shuffles forwards, and at just the right time, Camila stands up, one hand looped under Lauren’s left leg, and the other awkwardly cupping her ass.

_Whatever_ , Camila thinks, _it’s not like she can feel it anyway._

Lauren rests her head against Camila’s shoulder, like Camila had done earlier, and their cheeks brush. Lauren’s face feels hot. “Um… yeah. You can go.”

Camila carries Lauren out and lets her down in one of the garden chairs, a little less gracefully than she would’ve liked.

“You can just- uh, fold my chair up and leave it in your room.” Lauren says, “and… I guess just piggyback me there when we’re done.”

Camila nods, and folds the chair like Lauren had shown her, putting it in her room. Then, she heads outside and flops down in the seat next to Lauren and pulls her messy burger towards her.

“Finally, food.” When she turns to look at Lauren, the older Latina is flushed red, and she’s a little confused. “Are you warm?”

“I- um, no,” Lauren shakes her head and lets out an awkward, strained laugh. “I’m fine. Food, yeah.”

“What’s wrong?” Camila frowns, and her stomach drops a little. “I’m sorry I forgot to mention the steps, I wasn’t thinking-”

“You touched my ass,” Lauren blurts out, and then looks mortified when she closes her mouth. “I mean- uh… not that I didn’t… like it…”

“You- um, you felt that?” Camila frowns, blushing too, because she’d hoped that’d go unnoticed. “Sorry.”

“Yeah, uh,” Lauren rubs a hand along her thigh and Camila identifies that as a nervous tick. “I can feel that- uh… region. Um… fuck, sorry, this is so awkward-”

Camila tries to loosen the mood with a laugh. “ _Region?”_

“I- shut up, okay?” Lauren rolls her eyes, but she still looks a little embarrassed. “You’re the one who groped me.”

“I was giving you a piggyback!” Camila defends herself. “Besides, I didn’t- I didn’t think you’d feel it, so I didn’t feel the need to…adjust my hand’s position.”

“No, um, I can feel up until here,” Camila watches as Lauren squeezes a point in her upper thigh. “You know you can ask me these things, right?”

Camila blinks in surprise. “I can ask to touch your ass?”

“No, I-” Lauren splutters and shakes her head, “not what I meant. You can ask about my legs and my chair. It doesn’t- I’m not sensitive about it or anything. I know a lot of people feel like they have to skirt around the topic but I don’t care. If you have a question, ask.”

“Oh,” Camila looks down at her feet and shrugs. “I- um… okay.”

“So,” Lauren says, stuffing a few fries into her mouth, and whatever she says next, Camila doesn’t get because it’s muffled with food, “if you’ve got questions, ask them now.”

“Um…” Camila laughs, “want to say that again in English?”

Lauren swallows her mouthful of fries with a sheepish smile. “I said, if you’ve got questions, ask them now.”

“Well, you kind of just triggered one.” Camila answers, biting into her burger and getting a little distracted. “Okay, Lo, this is really good. I’m keeping you around.”

“I know, I’m pretty great,” Lauren answers with a teasing grin, “is your question how I’m so perfect? Because that’s classified information.”

“No, uh, it’s more like,” Camila tries to think of how to phrase it. “You’re homeschooled, and when you explained everything to me, you said you couldn’t face going back to our school. But you just said you’re not sensitive about it. _And_ when you met me, you didn’t tell me you were paralysed. You let me think you didn’t like me.”

“That’s more because I can’t stand pity.” Lauren replies. “Like, I _really_ hate it when people look at me like I’m broken. I’m not. People at school… they’d think back to what I used to be like, captain of the softball team, on the track team, practically always in the middle of the dancefloor at parties and think that I’m a broken version of that. They’d give me that fucking _look_ and I’d hate it. Like, one of my mom’s old friends came over the other week, and she knew me as a kid, and literally said that she feels so sorry for me to my face. Like, thanks, Gladys, don’t need your sympathy though.”

Camila snorts at the name _Gladys_ and Lauren sends her a grin. “Did you tell Gladys to fuck off?”

“I told Gladys to take her sympathy and shove it up her ass.” Lauren tells her with a proud grin. “And then my mom made an excuse about me being _sensitive_ so her friend wouldn’t freak.”

Camila smiles. “Anyway, uh… what was it like after the accident? Like, not straight after you woke up, but for like… the time before you accepted it. And how you did accept it.”

“Well, one of the big things was like, it could’ve been a lot worse. Apparently if the car had hit at like an inch difference to the angle it actually hit at, the way my spine would’ve snapped-” Camila cringes at the imagery, “would’ve paralysed me from the neck down. And another inch and I’d have died.”

Camila stops Lauren before she continues and pulls her in for a hug. “I don’t want to imagine you hurt.”

“Hey, I’m okay,” Lauren squeezes her hand. “I’ll always be okay.”

Camila keeps hold of Lauren’s hand and eats her food with her other. “Okay, keep going.”

“Okay, well you know what happened when I woke up. I didn’t have to accept it at first. A doctor told me there might be a chance of recovery but that turned out to be false.” Lauren says, and Camila’s heart breaks. “I was _really_ bitter. I refused any help I was given because at that point I was terrified that it meant the end of my independence. I was distraught about Lucy, too. One time – honestly my lowest point – I cussed out the doctors that saved my life and told them they should’ve let me die.”

Camila’s throat knots and she shakes her head. “Don’t say that.”

“I wouldn’t say that now,” Lauren says, and she rubs her thumb along Camila’s knuckles comfortingly. “I was really mad for a while. Part of it was because I was worried about college. Because I was captain of the softball team I was supposed to get a scholarship, but like I’ve said, I worked hard and now I have an academic one, so it’s all good.”

Camila laughs. “Yeah, that’s okay then.”

“But yeah, eventually I learned that just because I can’t walk doesn’t mean my life is over,” Lauren shrugs. “Besides… Lucy wouldn’t have wanted me to sit around moping all day. Actually, one time my therapist was like, _what would Lucy think_ and that’s when I realised that she’d slap me upside the head and tell me to get over myself. Not in a mean way, obviously, she’d never have done that. But Lucy was a really big believer in living life to the fullest, so…”

Camila squeezes Lauren’s hand again. “You’re going to do great things, Laur.”

“Thanks, Camz,” Lauren smiles at her. “You will too.”

“Okay, um,” Camila pauses to think of another question. “This one is going to be so fucking awkward but… we’re dating, so it’s okay.”

Lauren raises her eyebrows. “Let me guess. The infamous sex question.”

Camila blushes. “I- you don’t have to answer.”

“I haven’t since Lucy, but I can… feel down there like I said. And I’ve…” Lauren lets out an awkward laugh, “you know… done it myself a few times. So that’ll be fine when we get around to it. Plus, I was a bottom anyways.”

Camila definitely chose the wrong moment to take a sip of her drink, because she snorts water up her nose at Lauren’s last comment. As she’s coughing up her drink, Lauren pats her on the back to help her get it all out.

“Karla, mija, are you okay?”

Camila thanks the heavens that her mom hadn’t arrived a few moments before. “Yeah, just… my drink went down the wrong pipe.”

Sinu spots Lauren and beams. “Who’s your friend?”

“Oh, this is-” Camila pauses to cough again, “this is Lauren. Lauren, this is my mom, Sinu Cabello.”

“It’s really nice to finally meet you,” Lauren flashes a grin. “I practically had to _beg_ Camila to let me come over.”

“Bullshit,” Camila blurts out before she realises that her mom is there. After a scandalised _Karla Camila_ from her mom, she blushes and says, “I asked her over forever ago with the other girls _and_ another eight hundred times after that.”

Lauren rolls her eyes. “Defamation of character right there. I could sue you.”

“Anyway, it’s nice to meet you too Lauren.” Sinu says, before turning to Camila. “You girls might be interrupted in a minute because Sofi probably wants to play.”

“That’s my sister,” Camila explains to Lauren as Sinu goes back inside. “She really likes talking to my friends and then announcing they like her more than they like me. At least with you I know that’s definitely not true.”

Lauren smiles at her. “That’s cute. How old is she?”

“Six,” Camila answers, “and she’s crazy. She’ll try and get you to play with her.”

Lauren smirks. “Hide and seek. Best game to play with a kid. You tell them to go hide and then settle down with a nice book.”

“Sofi’s way too smart for that,” Camila laughs. “Trust me, I’ve done that one too many times.”

“Kaki, mami says you have a friend over,” Sofi’s voice drifts out from the kitchen and sends Lauren a warning look. After a few moments, Sofi appears in the doorway and spots Lauren. “Wow, she’s pretty.”

Lauren grins. “I like you already.”

“Wanna play games with me?” Sofi asks, not waiting for Lauren’s response. Instead, she runs over, taps Lauren on the shoulder and yells, “Tag, you’re it.”

Lauren reaches over and lazily taps Camila’s bicep. “Tag. Go chase your sister.”

“I don’t want to get up,” Camila argues, tagging Lauren back. “Now you’re it.”

“Except I’m not, because there’s no tag backs,” Lauren argues with her, and Camila feels like she’s just been transported back to the first grade. “So you’re still it.”

Sofi sighs. “You two are boring. Play with me, I’ve been out with mami and papi all day and they’re dumb adults.”

“Lauren’s here to see me, not play with you,” Camila points out, “go watch TV or something.”

Sofi looks over at Lauren and frowns. “Why are you wearing all black?”

Lauren laughs. “Because I like it. Plus I look good and I’ve got to let everyone know I’m cooler than your sister.”

“Well yeah, everyone is cooler than her,” Sofi replies easily, looking over Lauren once more. “You need new jeans.”

Camila glances at Lauren’s distressed black skinny jeans and quietly agrees. Even though ripped jeans are a current trend, Lauren just looks like she’d gone at hers with a razor until there are rips all up her thighs and down to her knee.

Sofi pokes at one of the holes and pinches Lauren’s bare leg. Lauren wouldn’t have noticed, but she’s watching Sofi’s every move. “Someone could poke you with like, a knife or something. Or you could fall and your jeans wouldn’t stop you from scraping your knees.”

“Good thing I don’t have to worry about either of those things happening.” Lauren retorts, sending Sofi a teasing grin. “Besides, ripped jeans are cool. As Camila’s coolest friend I can confirm that.”

Sofi hums and clambers onto Lauren’s lap. “I like you. You’re my best friend now. I’ll buy you new jeans with my allowance.”

“Okay,” Lauren replies, and spots Camila smiling at the two of them from the corner of her eye. “I’ll buy you some candy with mine.”

“I bet you get _loads_ of allowance since you’re old,” Sofi says, “my parents have promised to raise it by fifty cents a year. Right now I get five dollars. You must get so much.”

“Yeah, I’m crazy rich,” Lauren smiles. “I’m Camila’s sugar mama.”

Camila tries her hardest not to laugh, and when Sofi asks what that is, Camila says, “it’s a big kid thing. You’ll get it when you’re older.”

“Oh, okay.” Sofi says, “can I hang out with you?”

“Well, Lauren and I were going to go to my room,” Camila says, “so I’m not sure. I’ll think about it.”

Sofi pouts, and glances up at Lauren. “Will you carry me?”

“Sorry, can’t,” Lauren says, “Camz is already carrying me. If we add you on top she’ll end up collapsing.”

Sofi moves off Lauren and Camila gets up. “Want to watch movies, Laur?”

“Sure,” Lauren replies, smirking as Camila bends over in front of her. “I’m never going to get over this view.”

“Just get on my back,” Camila rolls her eyes, but she’s smiling, so Lauren smiles too and clambers onto her back. “I just realised this is like, the first time you’re seeing my bedroom.”

“Mhm, and definitely not the last.” Lauren murmurs into her ear, cackling when Camila blushes. “You’ve got a double bed, right?”

“Yeah,” Camila replies, “and before you make some crude comment my sister is still within earshot.”

“I was just going to say that I call the left side.” Lauren says. “Glad to know what you think of me.”

Camila laughs, and when she walks past an inquisitive looking Sinu, sends her mom an innocent smile. She kicks open her bedroom door, and gently sets Lauren down on the bed. Her friend leans against the wall and smiles, but before Camila can sit down she speaks again.

“Hey, look, my legs are straight,” Lauren says, “Ironic since I’m not.”

Camila snorts, and then jabs her thumb over her shoulder towards the door. “Want a drink?”

“Yeah, please,” Lauren nods, “just coke.”

“Okay, I’ll be back.” Camila assures her, and she leaves the room, closing the door behind her; she knows Lauren has a thing about open doors.

She heads into the kitchen, smiling at her mom, and pours two glasses of coke. She’s about to go back into her room when her mom speaks.

“I’m not sure I like this Lauren girl,” Sinu announces, “she has you carrying her to your room and now you’re getting drinks for her? She can get her own drink. I prefer your other friends.”

Camila blinks in surprise. “Mami, Lauren’s paralysed from the waist down and her wheelchair is folded up in my room. She wasn’t in it outside because she wouldn’t have been able to get down the steps in it.”

“I- oh,” Sinu falters, “I- well, I’m sorry, mija. I’m sure she’s a lovely girl.”

“Yeah, she is,” Camila replies, and she turns on her heel and walks out of the kitchen. She goes back into her room and sends Lauren a smile. “Hey. Got your drink.”

“Thanks,” Lauren takes it from her, and when Camila sits down, rests her head on the younger girl’s shoulder. “Where’d you put my chair?”

“Over there,” Camila points to the corner. “Do you need it?”

“You don’t have to get up again,” Lauren dismisses her, “I’m fine for now. I’ll let you know if I need it to get to the bathroom or something.”

“Okay,” Camila smiles when Lauren takes her hand and practically melts into her. She grabs her laptop and goes to Netflix with her free hand, and then looks over at Lauren. “Your choice. You’re the guest.”

“Damn, you’re a way better host than Dinah,” Lauren laughs, “you know, one time she threatened to wheel me off a cliff because I ate her Cheetos.”

Camila laughs. “I’m not surprised.”

Lauren scrolls through Netflix for something, and when there’s a knock on the door, she doesn’t look up. Sinu walks in, glancing at Camila, before looking at Lauren.

“Lauren, if there’s anything you need, don’t hesitate to ask,” Sinu says, “we can put your wheelchair by the door if you need it.”

“Oh, thank you for offering,” Lauren offers Sinu one of those charming smiles of hers, “but I think it’s best I keep it in here in case I need it for anything. I can just shift into it once it’s by the bed.”

Once Sinu ducks out of the room, Camila cringes. “I can’t believe she did that.”

“What? It was sweet,” Lauren tells her. “I like your mom. Your sister’s a sweetheart too.”

Camila just shrugs and bravely puts an arm around Lauren. “Both are only nice to my friends.”

“Oh, you got a text from Mani while you were gone, by the way,” Lauren says, “and don’t worry, I wasn’t snooping on your phone, it’s a group chat text. I got it too.”

Camila picks up her phone, and when she reads the texts, smiles to herself. “You’re going.”

“What? No, I’m not,” Lauren shakes her head, “I can’t go to Universal, Camz.”

“Yes, you can,” Camila argues with her. “Besides, we’ll all be able to cut in line if you come, they give people in wheelchairs special treatment. Also, you know, I want to spend time with you.”

Lauren sighs, but she’s smiling. “Good to know you’re not using me for the handicap perks.”

“I mean it, though,” Camila says, “I want to go on the big rides and I’ll need you to hold my hand. And _don’t_ tell me you can’t go on them, because they have wheelchair access on rides. Even if they don’t I’ll just carry you on anyway.”

“Fine,” Lauren answers, and Camila is surprised it was that easy to convince her. “I’ll come.”

“Yay,” Camila beams and pulls Lauren in for a hug. “I’m looking forward to it.”

Lauren picks out a movie, and stays cuddled up to Camila throughout it. Halfway through the second movie – Camila’s choice, this time – Lauren nudges her. “Can you get me my chair?”

“Okay,” Camila pauses the movie, kisses Lauren’s cheek and then grabs Lauren’s chair from the corner she’d left it in. She unfolds it, and moves around to help Lauren up, but Lauren waves her off.

“It’s fine,” Lauren says, and Camila watches as the older girl shifts herself into her chair. “Where’s your bathroom?”

“Through that door,” Camila points, “I’ll keep the movie paused for you.”

“Okay,” Lauren smiles, and Camila sits back down on her bed. She scrolls through Tumblr for a little while, and after a few minutes, Lauren comes out of the bathroom. “Hey.”

“Hi,” Camila gets up to help her, but Lauren shakes her head, so she stays put. She watches again as Lauren lifts herself out of her chair and shifts onto Camila’s bed. “Are you sure you didn’t want help?”

“Camz, I get in and out of my chair every day.” Lauren points out. “I’m pretty sure by this point I’m a professional at it. It’s only when there’s not another surface for me to shift onto when I need help, like in the kitchen earlier.”

“Oh,” Camila says, “okay then.”

She blushes when Lauren rests her head on her shoulder again and takes her hand. “Are you going to play the movie?”

“Oh, yeah, right,” Camila shakes her head and presses play again, “Sorry.”

After another movie, Camila decides that jeans are uncomfortable, so she’s going to get into her pyjamas.

Lauren smiles. “Pass me my bag. I’m going to get changed too.”

She passes Lauren her overnight bag, and then heads over to the _clothes chair_ where she dumps everything to find her PJs. She turns around, with the intention of telling Lauren that she’ll go in the bathroom to change and give her some privacy, but Lauren is already topless.

Camila stares at Lauren in shock, her mouth working, trying to find words but she’s completely unable to. Lauren raises an eyebrow as she grabs a t-shirt and pulls it on. “Yes?”

“I- I- um,” Camila stammers, still staring, “I- _boobs_ \- I mean-”

Lauren laughs. “Camz. It’s no big deal.”

“I- I just…” Camila blinks, “didn’t expect…”

“Yeah, well… I’m comfortable with my body,” Lauren shrugs, and Camila is still staring when she reaches down and takes her jeans off. “Breasts aren’t even a sexual thing, anyway.”

She watches as Lauren pulls them down to her knees, then lifts up one leg, pulls it out of her pants, and does the same for the other. Leaving her underwear on – _thank god,_ Camila thinks, _but that’s not much better because is she wearing a fucking thong???_ – and keeping hold of her right leg, she pulls the leg of what looks like a onesie up. Once both legs are in, she shuffles up and pulls it on properly, doing the zipper on the front and putting her hood up.

Sitting in front of Camila is the _cutest_ unicorn she’s ever seen.

“Oh my god,” Camila lets out a little squeal. “Lauren, you’re so cute.”

Lauren blushes, but shakes her head. “Go get changed, moron.”

“Oh, right,” Camila realises what she’d gotten up for in the first place, and rifles around in her clothes pile for her cow onesie. “Why’d you- uh, put a t-shirt on underneath?”

“Can’t sleep in this, I get too hot,” Lauren tells her, “so I unzip it and use it as pyjama pants. Now get changed, I want to watch something else.”

“Okay,” Camila nods, and she disappears into the bathroom and changes faster than she ever has in her entire life. Then, she goes back into her room and sits down next to Lauren, who has dropped her overnight bag onto the floor by her wheelchair. “Hi.”

“Hey,” Lauren bites down on her bottom lip and pats the spot next to her. “Come cuddle with me.”

Camila pushes back her bed covers. Instead of sitting against the headboard, they’d been against the wall. “Let’s get comfy.”

Lauren nods, and moves herself by grabbing the headboard and pulling herself up. Camila climbs in bed, and pulls the covers over them, Camila on the side next to the wall and Lauren on the left like she’d asked.

Camila lies against her pillow, and pulls Lauren close to her, so she’s laid on her side, her head on Camila’s chest. Camila moves her so Lauren’s left leg is over hers, and keeps her arms around her. Lauren nuzzles against her and Camila’s heart flutters.

Camila keeps her laptop on her stomach, and lets Lauren choose the next movie. Not that it matters; Lauren is asleep within ten minutes.

Camila runs her fingers through Lauren’s hair until she falls asleep herself.

She’s vaguely aware of Lauren getting up in the night, but she’s too sleepy to pay it any attention. When she wakes up in the morning, Lauren is still asleep, and she’s cuddled up to Camila with a stuffed lion in her arms.

Camila’s stomach flips, because she’s so fucking cute, and she leans down and kisses Lauren’s forehead. Then, she clambers over her, making sure to grab her phone – if Lauren wakes up she can text her – and heads out into the kitchen.

Her mom is in there, drinking her morning coffee. “Hi, mami.”

“Morning, mija,” Sinu says, looking around. “Lauren not awake?”

“No, she looked too c-” Camila stops herself from saying _looked too cute to wake up_ , “she looked tired, so I didn’t want to wake her.”

Sinu sends her a teasing look. “You have feelings for her.”

“I- I don’t…” Camila says, because she’d wanted to keep it a secret for a little while. Her family can come on a little strong. But when Sinu sends her a knowing look, Camila sighs. “Fine, I do.”

Sinu laughs. “Thought so. Have you told her?”

“Yes,” Camila answers. “I was going to cook for her yesterday as a date and we’ve been out on another date before that.”

“You were going to cook for her?” Sinu frowns. “You can’t cook. I’d know.”

“Exactly, she ended up doing it. I just made sure she didn’t fall while she was flipping the burgers.” Camila shrugs. “But she’s not my girlfriend, before you say that and freak her out.”

“Don’t worry, I won’t embarrass you,” Sinu says, “much.”

Camila sighs and makes herself a chocolate milkshake, deciding to hide in her room and play on her laptop until Lauren wakes up. Hopefully by that point, Sinu will have gone out.

But since the world hates her, she’s halfway back to her bedroom when her door opens and Lauren comes out, still in her unicorn onesie. “Morning, Camz. I figured you’d be in the kitchen, so…”

“Turn around,” Camila says with wide eyes, “go back into my room. Quick, before it’s too late.”

Lauren frowns. “But I’m hungry.”

“Oh, Lauren, are you awake?” Sinu looks out of the kitchen and sees Camila trying to push Lauren back into her bedroom. “Would you like some coffee or tea?”

“Yes, tea please,” Lauren smiles gratefully, “if Camila will let me past her.”

Camila sighs and moves aside, and Lauren sends her a smirk before wheeling into the kitchen. That’s when Camila realises Lauren knows exactly what she’s doing and how much Camila doesn’t want her to talk to her mother.

“Karla, aren’t you going to offer your friend breakfast?” Sinu frowns as she busies herself with the tea. “I thought I taught you better than this.”

“Yeah, Karla,” Lauren smirks at her. “Offer me breakfast.”

Camila wants to argue, because her mom hadn’t made her do that when Dinah, Normani and Ally had come over, but she sighs and says, “What do you want for breakfast, Lo?”

“Cheerios if you have them,” Lauren says, “if not then just toast.”

Camila nods, puts her milkshake on the side, and gets the box of Cheerios out of the cupboard, pouring Lauren a bowl. She goes to the fridge to get the milk and Lauren quickly shakes her head. “What?”

“You’re going to think I’m weird, but I don’t like milk on my cereal.” Lauren explains herself. “I never have.”

“I already thought you were weird,” Camila tells her, putting the milkless bowl in Lauren’s lap. “That just confirms it for me.”

Lauren rolls her eyes, but quickly changes her expression to her usual charming smile when Sinu passes her a mug of tea. “Thank you, Mrs Cabello.”

“You’re welcome,” Sinu smiles, “just call me Sinu.”

“Okay, well,” Camila announces, “Lauren and I have something we need to talk about. It’s just- um, school stuff. A teacher wanted to know-”

“Camila,” Lauren sends her a look and Camila knows she’s going to blab. “Did you suddenly forget that we-”

Camila puts a hand over Lauren’s mouth, smiles at her mom, and pushes Lauren out of the kitchen so she rolls down the corridor shouting an indignant _Camila_ behind her. She picks up her milkshake and smiles. “Later, mom.”

Before Lauren can come back in, Camila grabs her chair by the handles and steers her back into her bedroom, slamming the door behind them.

Lauren looks up at her with an amused smile. “Do you mind? It’s offensive to push someone’s wheelchair without their permission.”

“You’re a little shit,” Camila scowls at her. “Also, don’t call me Karla. It’s weird when it’s not my family saying it.”

Lauren laughs and dips her hand into her bowl of Cheerios, munching on them. “I like your mom. She’s nice to me. And I’m not a little shit, I’m taller than you.”

Camila rolls her eyes. “That means nothing when you’re always sat down.”

“Wow, thanks for sassing me.” Lauren says, and she gets her mug of tea from Camila’s bedside table, taking a sip, and putting it back down. “Hold this.”

Camila takes Lauren’s bowl of Cheerios with a frown. “Do you not even want them?”

“No, I want them,” Lauren says, and she shifts herself out of her chair and back onto Camila’s bed. “I just needed two hands to do that.”

“Oh,” Camila says, “getting yourself comfy, I see.”

“Well, yeah, your bed is comfier than my chair,” Lauren shrugs, and she laughs when Camila tests that theory and sits down in her chair. “That’s offensive.”

When Camila blurts out an apology and Lauren smirks at her, she realises that her friend had been joking, but she stands up anyways and joins Lauren on the bed. “It’s not that uncomfortable.”

“Never said it was uncomfortable,” Lauren tells her, stuffing Cheerios in her mouth. “I said your bed was comfier.”

Camila feels Lauren rest her head on her shoulder. “Is your mom picking you up?”

“Probably,” Lauren shrugs. “She insists on driving me everywhere since I can’t drive myself anymore, and she wants to _make sure I’m safe_.”

“Oh,” Camila says, “well, let me know when she’s coming so I can be presentable.”

“Sure,” Lauren smiles. “Is it okay if I use your bathroom to change? Mostly I change on my bed, but I can do it in there.”

“Well, I actually needed to go,” Camila lies, and she stands up and stretches, heading into the bathroom. “Just get changed and tell me when I can come back in.”

“Okay,” Lauren watches her go, and Camila closes the bathroom door behind her, thankful she’d brought her phone with her.

She closes the lid on the toilet and sits down, deciding to play a few iPhone games. After about a minute, she flushes the toilet, since she’d told Lauren she was going, but continues to sit on her phone for another few minutes until Lauren calls her out.

She walks back into the room and goes to sit next to Lauren, feeling a little dumb in a cow onesie now that Lauren’s fully dressed and looking fucking gorgeous – _why does she pull off oversized sweaters so well?_ Camila asks herself – so she grabs a flannel shirt and a pair of jeans and excuses herself to the bathroom again.

Once she’s ready, she goes back into her bedroom and sits down next to Lauren, her heart warm when Lauren takes her hand. “Hey, so my mom says she’s picking me up in an hour. She just texted. Apparently I have a thing today.”

Camila frowns. _A thing?_ Was that true, or was Lauren making it up so she didn’t have to spend any more time with her? “A thing?”

Lauren must’ve caught on to Camila’s train of thought. “I have an appointment with my therapist. I’d stay if I could.”

Camila blushes. “I wasn’t… I wasn’t doubting you.”

“You were, but I don’t blame you for that.” Lauren sends her a soft smile. “I _did_ reject you a lot.”

“I guess,” Camila murmurs, “I wish you could stay.”

Lauren hums. “How about you stay at my place one night? Because, not going to lie… you’re really nice to cuddle. I slept really well.”

“ _That’s_ why you do that so much,” Camila laughs. “I’m glad you like cuddling me, Lo. Works out for… for the future.”

Lauren raises an eyebrow. “The future?”

“Yeah,” Camila confirms, but she doesn’t elaborate. “Do you want to watch a show or something while we wait for your mom?”

“No,” Lauren says, “I want to play twenty questions with you.”

“Okay,” Camila agrees. “Ask away.”

“You’re going to want to hit me for this, but,” Lauren pauses and sighs, “favourite colour?”

“I do want to hit you,” Camila agrees with her, “such a generic question. But… I’m going to say green. What’s your _least_ favourite colour?”

Lauren hums. “Orange. It’s such an ugly colour. Favourite sport?”

“Walking to the fridge for food,” Camila answers easily. _Sports?_ She hates all sports. “Favourite book?”

“ _To Kill A Mockingbird_.” Lauren replies. “Sunrise or sunset?”

“I’m never awake to see the sunrise so by default I pick sunset.” Camila laughs when she hears Lauren’s adorable little giggle. “Favourite instrument?”

Lauren pauses to think. “Probably piano, since I play it, but I love the sound of an acoustic guitar. Biggest dream?”

“Funny, that links to my question, kind of,” Camila says, “I want to be a musician. It’s what I’m best at and it’s my one true passion. If you could do anything at all right now, what would you do?”

“Anything? Even if it’s impossible?” Lauren stares at her. “I mean, I’d want to fly, but I feel like that’s a generic answer since everyone wants to fly. Maybe play softball. If you could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, who would you pick?”

Camila grins and sends Lauren a wink. “You, next Saturday night.”

Lauren laughs. “That was smooth.”

“You bet I am,” Camila smiles, “but to answer your question seriously, I’d probably pick my dad. He’s still in Cali, because he couldn’t get a transfer with his job just yet, and I miss him a lot. One dinner would be great.”

“That’s really sweet, Camz,” Lauren looks at her admiringly. “And I’d love to meet him when he finally gets out here.”

“Yeah, I’d like you to meet him, too,” Camila replies, “anyway, uh… following on from the last question, if you could fly, where would you go first?”

Lauren thinks to herself. “Maybe… maybe Paris. I’ve always wanted to go to the top of the Eiffel Tower and look down at everything, even though I’m afraid of heights.”

Camila snorts. “If you’re afraid of heights, why would you want to fly if you could do anything?”

“Because it’d be cool!” Lauren defends herself. “Just being able to take off and go anywhere? That’s amazing. _Anyway_ … if you could read minds or become invisible, which would you pick?”

“Invisibility,” Camila answers instantly. “Imagine being able to hear everyone’s thoughts. You’d go crazy with that many things buzzing around your head. Would you ever get a tattoo?”

“Yes, considering I’ve got one and I’m planning to get two more in a few weeks,” Lauren answers, and Camila stares at her with wide eyes. Lauren laughs at her. “Your reaction is so cute.”

Camila looks Lauren over. “Where?”

“On my ass cheek, _duh_. It’s a full scale portrait of Mani’s face,” Lauren jokes, “you know, that actually reminds me about a thing I read where this woman got Beyoncé’s face tattooed onto her face.”

“Laur,” Camila pokes her in the arm. “Show me your tattoo.”

“Oh, yeah, sorry,” Lauren runs a hand through her hair, but flips it all over to one side and turns around as best as she can to show Camila the nape of her neck. “It’s a dragonfly. I got it for my abuela. My next tattoo – well, one of them – is going to be my other abuela’s name on the side of my wrist. The other one is going to be the number twenty seven.”

Camila’s fingers trace over the intricate little dragonfly on the back of Lauren’s neck. “It’s beautiful. When did you get it done?”

“Literally the day after my eighteenth birthday.” Lauren says. “I got Mani to drive me because my mom definitely wouldn’t have once she realised where we’d be going.”

“Wait, Lauren… how old were you when you were in your accident?” Camila asks, finding it hard to believe that she hasn’t asked Lauren yet. “Like… what’s the timeline?”

“Oh, uh…” Lauren trails off and pauses to think. “I was seventeen. It’s actually, uh, exactly a year ago today. It was my senior year. I’m repeating it now since I didn’t exactly have much time for schoolwork when I was being stubborn and bitter. Mani was happy about it at first – she started school a year later than everyone else since she was moving here that year, so she thought she’d have me around for longer, but I told her I wasn’t going back to school. No point for one year, so I just do online school.”

“Exactly what I told my mom when she told me we were moving,” Camila says, “The no point thing. But- uh, are you feeling okay?”

“What?” Lauren looks up at her and frowns. “Yeah, I’m fine. Are you okay?”

“No, I mean… you just said it’s been a year since the accident.” Camila points out, “so… I was wondering if you were feeling alright because of that.”

To Camila’s surprise, Lauren smiles. “Camz, I’m good. I promise. The only thing I mourn when it comes to that accident is Lucy, and even though I miss her so much, time heals wounds. I’m not going to burst into tears. I’ll probably feel a little off all day, but that’s about it.”

“Wait, really?” Camila frowns. “The only thing you mourn is Lucy? What about- what about your legs?”

“Well, I mean, sure, I miss… not being in my chair. I miss playing softball and swimming in my pool and doing track and just _walking_ , and if someone told me they could magic my spinal cord back to the way it was before, I’d let them, but if I could go back and save one thing, I’d save Lucy,” Lauren says. “Even if it meant I still got injured. She got the worst deal. At least I’m still here, and being in my chair isn’t the end of the world.”

“You really… you really loved her, huh,” Camila murmurs, “you’re so… you’re so sweet.”

Lauren shrugs. “I guess I’m _okay_.”

Camila kisses her temple. “You’re the best and you know it.”

_I just wish you loved me like that_ , Camila thinks, and then wants to smack herself for the thought. Lauren isn’t even her _girlfriend_ yet, and even though she’s planning on asking her soon, it’s still way too early for love.

_You need to stop being jealous of Lauren’s dead girlfriend_ , Camila tells herself, _Lauren likes you and she’s dating you, and even though you’re second choice because her first isn’t around, she still likes you. Don’t blow it_.

“What’re you thinking about?” Lauren asks. “You look really contemplative.”

“Just… about what I’m going to have for my second breakfast. Milkshake isn’t enough and I can’t eat right after I wake up,” Camila lies, “but I’ll figure that out when you go home.”

“You’re cute.” Lauren laughs, and Camila swears she hears Lauren mumble _second breakfast_ under her breath and chuckle. “Want to keep going with twenty questions?”

“Yeah, and that counts as one of your questions,” Camila grins, “Would you ever want to skydive?”

“I would rather declare my allegiance to Trump than throw myself out of a plane.” Lauren answers, and Camila laughs. “I’m scared of heights, remember?”

“ _You wanted to fly_!”

_“Because it’s cool!”_

“Still doesn’t make sense,” Camila mutters, loud enough for Lauren to hear. “Ask me a question.”

“Okay, um,” Lauren pauses in thought. “Celebrity crush?”

“Lauren Jauregui,” Camila laughs when she meets Lauren’s gaze. “No, but seriously, Emma Stone. Sexuality? I know you like girls, obviously…”

“I’m bisexual,” Lauren tells her, “You’re gay, right?”

“Laur, I’m gay as fuck,” Camila announces, “boys suck and I love announcing that now that I don’t have to pretend to be straight. What’s your favourite song?”

“I can’t pinpoint one. It changes all the time,” Lauren answers, “Do you want to kiss me right now?”

“Yeah,” Camila says, “do you want to kiss _me_ right now?”

“Obviously,” Lauren replies, “so I _guess…_ that settles it. We’ve got no choice. I’ve got to make out with you. It’s the only way to save mankind.”

Camila laughs, and shifts closer to Lauren, gently resting her hands on Lauren’s waist. She looks into Lauren’s _perfect_ eyes, and is millimetres away when---

“Karla!” Sinu calls from the hallway. “Lauren’s mother is here.”

Lauren pulls away from her with a laugh. “To be continued, I guess.”

“Yeah,” Camila hides her disappointment. “To be continued.”

She watches as Lauren shifts off the bed and into her chair and puts her overnight bag on her lap. Camila is still sat on her bed when Lauren calls her. “Hey. Aren’t you going to walk me out like a good host?”

“Yeah,” Camila stands up and follows Lauren out of her room, smiling politely at Clara when she sees her. “Hi, Mrs Jauregui.”

“Hi, Camila,” Clara smiles. “It’s nice to see you again. Lauren, are you ready to go?”

“Yeah,” Lauren nods, “what time is my appointment?”

“One,” Clara says, “we can drop your things off at home before we go.”

“Okay, just, hold on a second,” Lauren says, and Clara frowns, but nods as Lauren turns around and heads into the lounge, where Sinu had just gone. Camila watches as Lauren sends her mom a smile. “Thank you for having me over, Sinu.”

Sinu beams. “You’re welcome any time, Lauren.”

Then, Lauren turns, and bumps deliberately into Camila. “Give me a hug.”

Camila smiles, and leans down to pull Lauren in for a tight hug. “Thanks for finally coming over.”

“Thanks for not giving up and pestering me until I did,” Lauren murmurs back. “I had a lot of fun. I’ll text you, okay?”

“Okay,” Camila lets go of her and smiles. “I’ll see you later, Lo.”

“Bye, Camz,” Lauren replies, squeezing her hand one last time before she follows her mom out of the door.

Camila closes it behind her, and lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. She really, _really_ likes Lauren.

Her heart is warmer than it’s ever been.

-

When Camila hears a knock on her door, she grins, and yells a loud goodbye to her mom and little sister. She grabs her key and her purse, and opens the door to Dinah.

“Hey, Walz,” Dinah smiles, “You’re in the middle since you’re shortest after Ally and she’s driving.”

Camila frowns. “Mean. I don’t want to sit in the middle.”

Dinah smirks. “You’ll be next to Lauren.”

Camila pauses, and then walks past Dinah with a tiny smile on her face. “I’ll sit in the middle.”

“Thought that’d work,” Dinah laughs, and follows her out to the car. Camila clambers in, and once Dinah gets in after her, she’s pushed up against Lauren. “Ralph, say hi to your wife.”

Lauren rolls her eyes, and takes Camila’s hand. “Hey, you feeling okay?”

“Yeah,” Camila smiles, and looks Lauren over. She’s wearing ripped high waisted jeans that look like they were once black, but have faded, and a white crop top that leaves her abs on full view, which really isn’t good for Camila’s concentration. On top of that, she’s wearing a black bomber jacket, and a grey beanie is covering her messy hair. “You look… _so_ pretty, Laur.”

Lauren ducks her head to hide her smile. “ _Tanks_ , nugget.”

Camila’s stomach flips twenty times over at the adorable voice Lauren had put on, and her heart pounds as Lauren rests her head on her shoulder. “So- um, can I take you out later? Like… sneak away from the girls at the theme park and go for a little lunch date?”

“Sure,” Lauren smiles, “I’d like that.”

“You know we’re not deaf, right?” Dinah points out, “No ditching us.”

“We do what we want, DJ,” Lauren retorts with a grin, “right, babe?”

It takes Camila a few moments to realise Lauren is talking to her. “Oh, um, yeah.”

“So whipped, Mila,” Dinah laughs, “anyways, Ralph, you’re at my mercy today so you can keep your mouth shut or I’ll push you into a ride area and leave you there.”

Lauren raises an eyebrow. “I could just wheel myself out.”

“Fine, into a lake, then,” Dinah smiles, “your choice.”

“Not if I don’t run you over first,” Lauren shoots back, “I’ll hit into you in all the lines.”

“Is that sass I sense?” Dinah asks, sending Lauren a warning look. “Once we’re on the highway I’m opening your door and pushing you out of the car.”

Camila frowns. “Leave her alone.”

“Camz,” Lauren squeezes her hand. “It’s okay. That’s just how we are. Also, I’m going to get her first, so it’s fine.”

Dinah snorts. “In your dreams.”

“Still,” Camila trails off, “I don’t like the thought of you… getting pushed in a lake and drowning.”

“I wouldn’t actually,” Dinah assures her, “only if she eats my Cheetos again.”

“Once Laurinah decides who’s going to kill who first,” Normani says, “can we talk about what we’re going to do first?”

“Log flume for me,” Ally says, “that’s my favourite ride. Especially since it’s Jurassic Park themed.”

“Pass,” Lauren says, and rolls her eyes when she sees Camila’s pout. “I don’t want to have to sit around in wet clothes all day and I didn’t bring a change. I want to go on the Hulk.”

Camila frowns, because naturally Lauren would want to go on one of the biggest rides in the park. “Um… hold my hand on it?”

“Of course,” Lauren assures her. “That’s why I’m here. I’ve got to protect my Camzi. Otherwise she might pee her pants on all the rides and we wouldn’t want that.”

“You know, I’m starting to agree with Dinah,” Camila hums in thought, before turning to her friend, “Push her in a lake.”

“You don’t mean that,” Lauren calls her bluff and kisses her cheek, and Camila’s insides melt. “You _like_ me. Some might even say you _like like_ me.”

“How old are you, ten?” Normani laughs from the front seat. “Don’t know how you have so many people crushing on you.”

“Had,” Lauren corrects her, “But anyways, I only want Camz.”

_I only want Camz_. The words replay in Camila’s head and she feels like she could jump up and do a happy dance.

Normani shakes her head. “Have. Like, three different girls have asked me when you’re coming back to school because they want to ask you out. And a few guys too.”

“Well, sucks for them,” Lauren says, and Camila rests her hand on Lauren’s thigh and squeezes it. “I like this little nugget right here.”

Camila blushes. “Stop calling me a nugget. It’s making me blush and ruining my cool and casual façade.”

“You _are_ my nugget, though,” Lauren pushes a kiss to her cheek. “Would you prefer me to call you my chicken?”

Camila blushes even more, if that’s possible. “Chicken nugget?”

“No, no, no,” Lauren shakes her head, “you’re either a chicken or you’re a nugget. Pick one.”

“Fine, fine, I pick nugget,” Camila relents with a laugh. “You know, for someone I thought was kind of a badass, you’re pretty adorable.”

“You can be badass and adorable at the same time,” Lauren defends herself. “I can’t help it that I’m cute.”

“Who are you, Dinah?” Ally laughs from the driver’s seat. “I thought she was the one who’d always call herself cute.”

“Because I am,” Dinah adds with a grin. “Lauser _wishes_ she was this cute.”

Camila raises an eyebrow. “Lauser?”

“It’s Lauren and loser,” Lauren explains for her. “She invented it on the spot a few months back and thinks it’s the best nickname anyone has ever come up with.”

Camila rolls her eyes. “No, that’s Camz.”

Lauren blushes, and Camila swears she hears Dinah and Normani fake gagging. “Thanks, baby.”

Camila puts an arm around Lauren, beaming when the older girl nuzzles up to her and closes her eyes. They’re like that for a good ten minutes before Camila realises that Lauren had drifted off to sleep, and she smiles down at her, because she’s really adorable when she sleeps.

“She falls asleep so easily,” Camila comments, nodding down at Lauren. “It’s cute.”

“She could murder someone and you’d think it’s cute,” Normani laughs, “but yeah, that’s always been a talent of hers. She can sleep anywhere at any time, basically. She’ll probably stay knocked out until we get there.”

Camila hums, and kisses under Lauren’s ear, just below the hem of her beanie. “I won’t disturb her, then.”

She stays curled up with Lauren for the car journey, listening to her music through one ear and the girls’ conversation with the other, occasionally pitching in with a bad joke. When they finally arrive at Universal, Camila shakes Lauren awake as they’re looking for a parking spot.

“Hey, Lo,” Camila shakes her, “wake up. We’re here.”

Lauren blinks a few times, and her eyes squint as they adjust to the light. “Oh. Morning.”

Camila laughs as Ally parks. “Morning. Sleep well?”

“Yeah,” Lauren rubs at her eyes. “I had a really weird dream that I was being chased by a dinosaur. It was like, Jurassic Park but in real life. Thanks for waking me up before it ate me.”

Camila laughs, unbuckling her seatbelt. “You’re welcome.”

Lauren nods to the other door that Dinah had just left through. “Aren’t you getting out?”

“Oh, uh, I’ll wait with you if you want,” Camila offers, squeezing Lauren’s hand. “Besides, even if it’s only for a few minutes, we have a little alone time.”

Lauren smirks. “I think I know what you’re implying.”

“Yeah,” Camila grins, and starts to lean in, but the door behind Lauren swings open and Normani shoots her an eye roll. Camila sighs. _“Really_? _Every_ time.”

Normani snorts. “Sorry to interrupt the making out, but Laur, get in your chair, I want to go on some rides.”

Lauren gives Camila a quick peck on the lips, and then shifts out of the car and into her wheelchair with an exasperated sigh. “You couldn’t let us have just a _minute_ to-”

“No, we couldn’t,” Dinah laughs, “We didn’t bring you to Universal so you could make out with Walz in the car.”

Camila clambers out of the car after Lauren. “Well, at least I get to hold your hand on all the rides.”

Lauren laughs. “Yeah, there’s that, which is always good.”

 

Camila opts out of going on the Hulk for a second time, and doesn’t think it’s the best idea before lunch. She wants to be able to enjoy pizza to the best of her ability and not feel queasy because of a ride.

Once the others have gone on the ride – they bought fast passes to get on quicker – Camila is incredibly excited for lunch, one of her favourite times of the day. Lauren excuses herself to the bathroom, and Dinah and Ally go to a burger place nearby. Normani hangs back with her.

“So…” Normani grins, “how’s it going with Lauren?”

“It’s… it’s really good,” Camila smiles. “Sometimes I feel a little weird about it, but it’s good.”

Normani bristles and fixes her with a cold look. “Weird about it? Because she’s in a wheelchair? Because that’s not-”

“No, I didn’t mean that,” Camila rolls her eyes. “I don’t even think about that. Lauren is Lauren, stood up or sat down. I’m weird about it because sometimes I worry I’m her second choice.”

Normani frowns. “Really?”

“Yeah,” Camila sighs, “I mean, she still seems so in love with Lucy a lot of the time-”

“Their relationship was far from perfect,” Normani interrupts her. “Lucy got her into drugs and she was constantly partying. Sometimes I think the accident happened to stop her from killing herself through overdose or alcohol poisoning. Sometimes I feel like it was the best thing that ever happened to her.”

“Mani…” Camila trails off, “I don’t think that’s-”

“I don’t mean it like- I don’t know,” Normani shrugs, “she needed to learn not to throw her life away to drugs because I _know_ she was doing harder stuff with Lucy than weed but she was way too blinded by love. Lucy manipulated her a lot and Lauren still doesn’t see that. If I said one bad thing about her she would cuss me out and we ended up not talking for a year because we argued about it and she picked Lucy.”

“I don’t think- even if she hadn’t died – and I know it sucks because nobody deserves to lose their life like that,” Normani says, “but I feel like if Lucy had gotten out unscathed she wouldn’t still be with Lauren. She would’ve left her for someone who could still go out clubbing with her and sneak into bars with her.”

“She turned Lauren into someone I couldn’t even recognise,” Normani says, “Lauren turned into the kind of person she’d always despised, and she was a total bitch to everyone. Even to _Ally_. This one time after our fight, Ally went over to her and asked her if she wanted to hang out, just the two of them, and Lauren laughed in her face and said – honestly, I don’t even know what she said. All I know is that it made Ally cry harder than I’ve ever seen her cry.”

“When I heard she was in the hospital after a car accident, at first I was stubborn.” Normani admits. “I didn’t want to see her because she wasn’t my best friend anymore. She hadn’t been for a while. And then my mom came home one day and told me she ran into Clara at the store, and Clara had told her the extent of what- of what had happened. Then my mom told me and I rushed straight there. I expected her to tell me to leave or to shout that she didn’t need me.”

“She was crying. She told me she was sorry for everything and didn’t know what happened to her and I just hugged her and told her it was okay, but I always thought in the back of my mind that if she got better she’d fall back down that hole. Dinah straight up told her she deserved it, because Dinah was the angriest out of us all when we fought, mostly because of how she upset Ally.” Normani explains. “But I was the first person she called when she found out the damage was permanent and she was so scared and I just- I hated that she was in this position but at the same time… it helped her too.”

“That’s why I like you. You’re- you’d be a good influence. You wouldn’t get her back into that and you wouldn’t manipulate her into something she’s not.” Normani says. “I know she still smokes – she tries to hide it from me and she probably thinks I don’t know but I do. _I’m going to the bathroom? Sure, Lo_.”

Normani grabs Camila’s hand and pulls her to the corner so they can see the bathrooms. And sure enough, there’s Lauren, smoking a cigarette. “I’m not going to yell at her for that. It’s her choice and she doesn’t do it around me, so…”

“I’m really surprised about all of that stuff,” Camila says, “I mean, I’ve encountered bitchy Lauren before, but I’ve never... I didn’t think she’d ever do drugs. Like, _real_ drugs. Or make Ally cry.”

Normani shrugs. “I like to say that was her evil twin, because she wasn’t herself while she was with Lucy. That relationship was toxic and she doesn’t even realise.”

“She told me she’d always love her,” Camila replies, “and after hearing all of this… I really wish she wouldn’t.”

“We all do,” Normani sighs, “but I’m glad she’s with you. Are you guys official yet?”

“I was planning on asking her today.” Camila blushes and looks down at her feet. “Over lunch.”

Normani grins. “I’d love to hear your plan in detail, but she’s coming back.”

Sure enough, a few moments later, Lauren lightly wheels into Camila. “Camz. Pay attention to me.”

Camila leans down and kisses her. She can taste the cigarette smoke on her lips. “That good enough?”

“Yeah,” Lauren smiles. “Definitely. What’d you guys talk about?”

“Not much,” Normani says, and Camila can see the smirk on her face as she turns to meet Ally and Dinah. “Did you go past someone who was smoking? I can smell it on you.”

“I- yeah,” Lauren easily answers, and Camila sees Normani’s eye roll and laughs. “What’re we doing for lunch?”

“Dinah and Ally have my food,” Normani says as they reach their friends who’re sat on a bench eating burgers. There’s a third one there, but nothing for Lauren or Camila. “You can fend for yourself.”

“Actually,” Camila says, “there was a place to get pizza slices not too far away. Want to check that out, Laur?”

“Sure,” Lauren answers, and when Camila starts walking away, bumps into her again and pats her lap. “Come on. I’ll give you a ride. Consider it me returning the favour for your piggybacks.”

Camila is uncertain. “What if I hurt you? I might be heavy.”

“Camila,” Lauren points out, “it’s kind of impossible to hurt me when I can’t feel my legs. Come on.”

Camila sighs, and perches on Lauren’s lap as tentatively as she possibly can. Lauren laughs and pulls her further on. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine,” Lauren says, and she starts to roll them towards the pizza place. “It’s harder on my arms than on my legs. Not used to pushing this big a load. I should invest in an electric wheelchair and we can go zooming around everywhere. Maybe one of those kickass mobility scooters. We can attach a boom box to it.”

Camila laughs at the mental image. “Lo, those are for old people, dumbass.”

“That’s ableist and biphobic, because I’m bi, disabled and inconvenienced,” Lauren announces, pouting. “Anyway, you can order. I want two slices of pepperoni. Make sure I get a decent amount as well. Sometimes they give you massive slices with one little bit of pepperoni on.”

Camila rolls her eyes, and stands up once Lauren gets to a table. She moves one of the chairs so Lauren can just wheel up to the table, and kisses the top of her head before she heads over to the counter.

“Four slices of pepperoni pizza for me and my girlfriend to be,” Camila smiles at the lady taking orders, who really doesn’t seem to care that Camila is about to make a monumental decision in her life. “Oh, and two cokes.”

Once she has their food and drink, Camila goes back over to the table and sets Lauren’s food down in front of her.

“She didn’t look happy,” Lauren says, nodding over to the woman at the counter. “Though, I wouldn’t be either if I was stuck working here. Theme parks are full of annoying kids like you.”

“Hey!” Camila pouts. “I’m not annoying. You like me.”

“Yeah, maybe annoying is my type,” Lauren hums in thought. “Who knows, really.”

“Anyway, um,” Camila grows nervous when she realises what she has to ask. “So… I wanted to get away from the girls for a minute since our… relationship isn’t exactly platonic. And you know, we go out on dates and stuff.”

Lauren hums. “Yeah. I figured you’d want a sneaky romantic break.”

“And, uh, I have a… a thing to say,” Camila says, drumming her fingers on the table and looking anywhere but Lauren. “I- um… _willyoubemygirlfriend_?”

Lauren blinks at her. “Can you repeat that in English?”

“I-… I wanted to- to know if,” Camila sucks in a breath and tries to stay calm, “will you be my girlfriend?”

Lauren stares at her for a moment, and Camila feels completely vulnerable under the gaze of those beautiful emeralds Lauren calls eyes. “That’s… I- I’m sorry. But no.”

Camila looks up in surprise, not sure she heard her right. “No?”

“Just… get up,” Lauren orders her, and Camila wants to cry. She’s ruined everything. “Do it. It’s important. Stand up and just… stay.”

She frowns, but does as Lauren says, and waits for something to happen. Every second feels like an eternity. Camila just wants to go home and cry, but Lauren comes towards her at what looks like top speed, and rams into her legs. Camila’s knees buckle, and once again, she lands in Lauren’s lap. “What’re you doing?”

“Oh, nothing,” Lauren smiles and kisses her. “Just sweeping my girlfriend off her feet.”

Relief washes over her like a tidal wave. “Was it really necessary to scare me like that? I thought I’d ruined everything.”

“You could never,” Lauren wraps her arms around Camila’s waist and dots kisses across her cheek. “Anyways, since I couldn’t just get up, grab you and kiss you, I had to think of a better plan.”

“And that plan was to ram into me and break my knees?” Camila asks with a laugh. “Well… worked out for you, I guess.”

“Sorry. Did I hurt you?” Lauren asks, but Camila shakes her head and smiles. “Then yeah, guess my plan did work out. Now get off me, I want to eat my food.”

“Really? I thought you were enjoying having my ass right up against you.” Camila teases her, staying put on Lauren’s lap. “Don’t you just _love_ it?”

“Alright, fine, stay there then,” Lauren shrugs, pushing herself back around to her side of the table and picking up her pizza. “Have fun trying to reach your food.”

Camila pouts, but gets off Lauren, leaning down and kissing her. She slides her food towards her, so her plate is next to Lauren’s, and then gets herself comfortable on her girlfriend’s lap again. “There. Done.”

Lauren laughs, and wraps one arm around Camila’s waist, eating her food with the other. “Hey, Camz?”

“Yeah?” Camila looks around at her _girlfriend_. “What’s up?”

“Thanks,” Lauren says, “for… I don’t know, wanting me in your life as your girlfriend. I really appreciate you.”

“I appreciate you too,” Camila assures her, reaching down and squeezing the hand Lauren has on her waist. “And I’m so glad you said yes.”

“Of course I’d say yes,” Lauren nuzzles against her and Camila melts. “Why wouldn’t I? You’re perfect.”

“I don’t know,” Camila shrugs, “sometimes I worry too much and then those thoughts get so intrusive that I start to believe them. But I talked to Mani about it and she- she helped me out.”

“Remind me to thank her, then,” Lauren smiles, “whatever she told you, I’m glad she did.”

“Yeah,” Camila murmurs, “also, I saw you smoking, so I know you lied to her about that.”

Lauren laughs. “Yeah, she’d kill me if she knew. She doesn’t like that kind of thing so I told her I quit.”

_She knows_ , Camila thinks, but she doesn’t voice that to Lauren. “Well, I don’t care. Just don’t tell my mom you do it or she’ll break us up.”

“I won’t,” Lauren smiles and nuzzles against her again. “You’re so cute.”

Camila blushes. “You’re the cute one, cuddling up to me like a little puppy.”

“Obviously I’m going to cuddle you, you’re my cute little nugget,” Lauren murmurs, “my _girlfriend_. Considering Lauren from six months ago thought she was going to die alone, this is perfect. I’ve trapped you now.”

Camila rolls her eyes. “How would you die alone? Have you looked in a mirror recently? You’re gorgeous.”

Lauren laughs. “It wasn’t like that. It was more like I didn’t think I’d ever like anyone else in that way since I was so hung up on Lucy. I never thought I’d find anyone that would make me feel that way, and when I met you, it was like _fuck, she’s cute_ , but I didn’t think it’d go anywhere because I was planning on keeping you at a distance. I didn’t want you finding out and pitying me and the girls grudgingly played along for me.”

Camila frowns. “What do you mean?”

“Well, like, not being in my chair when I met you was just lucky,” Lauren answers, “but every time after that I’d go to whichever house we were at early and pick a spot on the couch, which I would’ve done anyway, and then make the girls hide my chair and hope and pray I didn’t need it to get to the bathroom. You seeing me at the restaurant with my parents wasn’t something I was counting on so I lashed out in the hopes you’d leave but naturally my mother forced me to talk to you.”

“I’m glad she did,” Camila says, “I finally got the explanation I was hoping for. I was moping that day because I’d asked you to hang out and you’d declined yet again.”

“Well, I really couldn’t then,” Lauren tells her, “I’d promised my parents I’d spend time with them.”

“I understand why you didn’t come to the waterpark, but I literally suggested that to spend time with you. I figured you just didn’t want to be alone with me, so inviting the girls would’ve made you want to come.” Camila explains her plans. “And then you didn’t and I was grouchy all day because I didn’t understand why.”

“That’s just because I didn’t want to drown,” Lauren laughs, “and I said no to coming to your house because I figured your bedroom would be up a flight of stairs. No to go karting was obvious. And the biking with your family too, but I _did_ tell you the truth there, because I’ve never been able to ride a bike. I never learned. Was always more of a scooter kid.”

“Still,” Camila smiles, “all worked out in the end. Even though you probably should’ve just told me when we met.”

Lauren rolls her eyes. “Yeah, whatever, in hindsight I could’ve told you, but I also couldn’t, because I didn’t know what your reaction would be. Would you pity me like most people, or threaten to push me in a lake like Dinah? Who knows.”

Camila snorts. “When as someone ever looked at you and thought _I’m going to push her in a lake?”_

“You literally witnessed Dinah doing that this morning,” Lauren points out, finishing off her drink. “Do you want to head back to the girls?”

“Sure,” Camila nods, and she stretches and gets up. “If you want a break, I can push you.”

Lauren smiles. “I love it when my mom does that when we’re out. I can have a nap. It’s especially perfect when we’re on vacation so I have Nala with me.”

Camila frowns, and then remembers the stuffed lion Lauren had mysteriously woken up with at her house. “Oh! You sleep with a stuffed animal?”

Lauren blushes. “Yes. She’s my cuddle buddy. Always has been and always will be. Lucy always made fun of me for it. Not in a mean way or anything, just teasing.”

“I think it’s adorable,” Camila says, and she starts pushing Lauren back in the direction of the girls. “I don’t know why, but you were a lot lighter when I was giving you a piggyback.”

“The chair is pretty heavy,” Lauren tells her, “I can push myself.”

“No, I’m doing it-” Camila goes to argue, but Lauren zooms out of her grip and way ahead of her. Camila runs to keep up, but considering this is the first time she’s run in about ten years, she’s out of breath quickly, and Lauren is a good distance ahead of her, laughing.

“Come and get me, slowpoke,” Lauren teases her, sticking her tongue out, “bet you can’t catch me.”

“You’re right, I can’t,” Camila tries to get her breathing back, “I think I have a collapsed lung.”

“Aw, Camzi,” Lauren comes back over to her and pats her lap. “Does my tired little nugget need her girlfriend to carry her everywhere?”

“It’s not my fault that thing goes a hundred miles an hour,” Camila defends herself. She swears she’s not _that_ unhealthy.

“It goes as fast as I push it,” Lauren tells her, before she laughs to herself, “wow, Camz. I can’t feel my legs and I’m still way more athletic than you.”

“Yeah, well, you’re a jock,” Camila points out. “I’m- I’m not.”

“Think you’ve regained your energy?” Lauren asks, and Camila nods hesitantly. “Come on then. The girls are probably wondering where we are. Also, I’m _so_ telling them I beat you in a race.”

“Honestly, Lauren, it’s not that much of an accomplishment,” Camila laughs, “A tortoise could beat me in a race.”

“Well, slow and steady _does_ win, apparently,” Lauren agrees, “but I still kicked your ass.”

Camila just laughs and steals Lauren’s beanie. “I’m wearing this.”

“Camz,” Lauren pouts, “now everyone can see I didn’t wash my hair last night.”

“Fine,” Camila puts Lauren’s beanie back on her, but pulls it down over her face and laughs, before she pushes Lauren forwards again. “I could be taking you anywhere right now.”

A disgruntled looking Lauren pulls the beanie from over her eyes and shakes her head. “Well, if you’re kidnapping me, can we stop by the bookstore on the way? I need something new to read.”

Camila smiles. “Sure. I need to pick up some ropes on the way anyway, so I can make sure you won’t escape.”

“Wow, Camz, didn’t know you were into bondage,” Lauren sends her a smirk. “Kinky.”

Camila blushes and shakes her head. “You know that’s not what I meant.”

Lauren just smirks. “If you’re into that, I’m not going to judge.”

“ _Lauren_ , I’m not,” Camila whines, “I’ll run you into an unsuspecting passer-by if you don’t stop teasing me.”

Lauren snorts. “What are they going to do? They’re not going to yell at me or they’d look bad. Like, imagine how you’d look if you were mad at me and you shouted at me right now. People would think you’re some kind of heartless monster, yelling at a girl in a wheelchair. I can basically do what I want, I’ll just pretend to be all sad and people feel bad.”

“What happened to _I hate pity_?”

“Well,” Lauren shrugs, “I don’t mind it if it gets me out of trouble.”

Before Camila can retort, Lauren spots the girls, and speeds ahead to meet them. Camila smiles after her, because she’s really falling for Lauren and she feels like today could go down in history as the best day of her life.

-

“Laur says she’s coming to the softball game on Friday,” Normani casually comments as Camila grabs some books out of her locker. “It’s the first time she’s been to one since the accident.”

“Oh,” Camila answers. “That’s cool. Good for her.”

Normani sighs. “You’re really oblivious, aren’t you? I’m trying to tell you that you should go with her. Lauren may be fine with being paralysed, but I know that softball is the one thing she really misses. She might need a hand to hold.”

“Okay, I’ll go with her then,” Camila shrugs, “you could’ve just said that, Mani. Damn.”

“I wanted you to decide to go on your own,” Normani defends herself. “Besides, Lauren needs the support, even if she acts like she doesn’t.”

“I’m texting her now,” Camila says, “and I know that. She’s just… really independent.”

**_Camz (12:47PM): hey lo mani told me you’re going to a softball game on Friday wanna make it a date???_ **

**_Laur (12:48PM): Okay, if you’re sure you want to see me yelling at them all about how much they suck without me._ **

**_Camz (12:48PM): even better ill help u shout_ **

**_Laur (12:48PM): Aw, my girlfriend is so supportive. :)_ **

**_Camz (12:49PM): of course i am haha_ **

“You smile when you’re texting her,” Normani observes, “that’s sappy.”

“I bet you smile when Dinah texts you,” Camila accuses, “so you can’t talk.”

Normani scoffs. “I roll my eyes when Dinah texts me because it’s mostly just her wanting to know which selfie she should post.”

Camila huffs. “Lauren never sends me selfies.”

“Yell at her on Snapchat for it,” Normani shrugs. “She’ll send you one if you annoy her enough.”

Camila frowns. “She has Snapchat?”

Normani nods. “Yeah, it’s laurenjauregui1. I didn’t realise you didn’t have her on there.”

“I mean, I don’t really use it,” Camila shrugs, “but if it means I’ll get Lauren selfies…”

Camila trails off and adds Lauren on Snapchat, and a few moments later gets the notification that Lauren has added her back. She smiles, and goes back to her texts.

**_Camz (12:52PM): send me a selfie_ **

**__ **

Lauren reads her message, but doesn’t respond, and after a few moments, Camila gets a snapchat notification.

Camila screenshots without thinking and sets the picture as her home screen – her lock screen is a sneaky candid she’d taken of Lauren while they were at lunch one day.

**_Camz (12:53PM): thank u_ **

“You’re so whipped for her,” Normani snorts, “anyway, I’m going to meet Dinah. You coming?”

“Um, I’ll catch up with you,” Camila says, and Normani nods and heads down the hall. Camila goes to her call history and presses Lauren’s name, holding the phone up to her ear. When it connects, she smiles. “Hi.”

_“Hey, Camz_ ,” Lauren says, “ _how’s school_?”

Camila shrugs, but realises Lauren can’t see her. “It’s the same as ever. I miss you, though.”

_“I miss you too,”_ Lauren replies, “ _what’re you doing?”_

“Just in the hallway by my locker,” Camila answers, “what about you?”

_“Studying,”_ Lauren deadpans, “ _I’ve got an essay I need to submit. I’m proofing it now, just making sure I’ve got all of my references.”_

“Sounds boring,” Camila says, “want me to come over later?”

“ _I’m going to need a nap after this, so bring some PJs and come cuddle me,”_ Lauren replies, and Camila beams, because cuddling with Lauren is so perfect. _“After that we can watch a couple of movies and have a lazy night in.”_

“Okay,” Camila agrees, “I’ll go home, get my stuff, and come straight to yours.”

_“Come gay to mine, you can’t do anything straight,”_ Lauren jokes, and Camila rolls her eyes. “ _What classes do you have today?”_

“I had literature this morning, and music after that.” Camila says, “Today would’ve been perfect if not for double period of gym after lunch.”

_“That’s not that bad_ ,” Lauren comments, “ _I’d like a day like that. But honestly, try not to get pummelled by dodgeballs in gym. I want my girl in one piece when she gets to me.”_

Camila laughs as the bell rings. “Alright. I’ll call you later, okay?”

“ _Okay_ ,” Lauren answers. _“Bye for now, Camz_.”

“Bye, Laur,” Camila says, and presses the _end call_ button. She tucks her phone back into her pocket and heads towards the gym, knowing she’ll meet up with Dinah and Normani there.

She smiles to herself as she thinks about Lauren, and she looks back at her new home screen. She knows she’ll never make it onto Lauren’s home screen, but she’s okay with that. She’s already accepted that she’s second to Lucy.

Twenty minutes away from her, Lauren is sat at her desk, editing a reference in her Word document. Her phone lights up, and she rolls her eyes at the notification – a game reminding her she hasn’t played for a while. She swipes left to clear the notification, and smiles at her lock screen.

It’s a picture Dinah had taken, when she’d stolen Lauren’s phone without her noticing. Camila is sat on Lauren’s lap, and Lauren has her arms wrapped around her waist and her chin rested on Camila’s shoulder. When Lauren had seen the picture, she couldn’t resist – they both looked so happy, so she had to set it as her wallpaper.

She’d felt a little guilty about taking the picture of her and Lucy away, but after thinking about it, she decided she liked the new one more.

She’d always thought Lucy was her soulmate. Now she isn’t so sure.

-

“Are you excited?”

Lauren frowns at her. “Not particularly. Why are you so enthusiastic?”

“I don’t know, Mani said you get really into softball games.” Camila shrugs. “So I’m just mimicking what she told me.”

Lauren laughs. “I’m indifferent right now, Camz. We’ll see how the team perform.”

Camila hums. “Are you nervous about seeing your old teammates?”

“Mostly irritated,” Lauren admits. “There were a few who I haven’t seen since the accident. Didn’t even get a text asking if I was okay. Bear in mind all of these girls acted like they were my best friend before.”

“Do you want me to hit them for you?” Camila asks, because honestly, she would. “All you need to do is point them out.”

“No, but I want to get close enough to run them over.” Lauren says. “Preferably after the game, because I still want the team to win, but still.”

Camila snorts at the mental image of Lauren running over a couple of faceless teenage girls. “Alright. I’ll let you get your revenge your own way.”

Lauren flashes her a smile. “Anyway, where did Dinah, Mani and Ally say they’d meet us again?”

“Uh, by wherever the game is happening,” Camila says, “I figured you’d know where that is.”

Lauren laughs. “Yeah, I do. I take it you’ve never been to the softball field before. Or any softball field before.”

“How’d you guess?” Camila says, absentmindedly reaching out and messing with Lauren’s hair. “I’m obsessed with your hair. It’s so fluffy.”

Lauren grins. “Just like me, then. Fluffy and harmless. But if you tell _anyone_ and ruin my rep, I’ll run you over.”

Camila snorts. “What rep?”

“My badass rep,” Lauren clarifies, holding her head up high. “You know, as the super cool softball star. The badass who could kick your ass.”

Camila rolls her eyes and ruffles Lauren’s hair. “Alright, let’s pretend you’re not a total puppy.”

Lauren laughs, and grabs Camila’s hand, squeezing it comfortingly. “Alright, maybe I am a puppy. But I’m a cool one.”

“Yeah,” Camila agrees, kissing the top of her girlfriend’s head. “You’re a cool one.”

“Oh my god, Lauren!”

A squeal cuts off whatever Lauren was about to say, and for a split second, Camila catches Lauren’s expression sour, before she twists it back into that charming smile of hers. “Hi, Taylor.”

A tall, slender blonde girl who Camila figures is Taylor pulls Lauren in for an awkwardly delicate hug, as if she thinks touching her a tiny bit will break her. “How are you? I haven’t seen you in forever.”

“Yeah, haven’t texted, either,” Lauren mutters, but only Camila can hear her. “I’m fine.”

Lauren doesn’t ask about Taylor, which puts her off a little. “Well, it’s cool that you’re here to see the game. Any chance of you- um, coming back?”

Lauren raises her eyebrows. “Does it _look_ like there’s a chance?”

Taylor splutters a little, and tries to make amends. “I was just asking if- if you’ll get better or-”

“I’m not broken in the first place,” Lauren snaps. “Besides, you didn’t seem to care enough to even send a fucking text when I was stuck in the hospital for two months after nearly _dying_. Now if you don’t mind, my girlfriend and I are going to meet our friends.”

Camila follows Lauren, and when she sees Taylor’s wince, she knows that Lauren had made sure to wheel over her toes. When they’re out of earshot, she squeezes Lauren’s shoulder. “Are you okay?”

“It felt good to snap,” Lauren admits, looking up at her with a sheepish smile. “Should I have just kept my mouth shut?”

“If you had, I wouldn’t have,” Camila laughs, “I don’t even know the girl and she made me mad. Did she really not even text?”

“Nope. Haven’t heard anything from her since that last practice before Lucy picked me up.” Lauren shrugs. “Apparently she’s captain now. I bet she asked if I’d get ‘better’ just to make sure she keeps the position. She was always like that.”

“For real?” Camila frowns. “That’s not a good way to be.”

“Yeah, for real. She always tried to get me demoted or kicked off the team. She made coach do a drug test because she accused me of being on steroids. Like, no, I’m just that good.” Lauren confirms. “Honestly, if the accident hadn’t happened, she’d have probably killed me off by now to get the position herself.”

Camila laughs. “Why do I feel like you’d put up a good fight, though?”

Lauren beams at her. “You really think I could kick her ass?”

“Hell yeah,” Camila grins, “I’d help you take her down.”

“Thanks, babe,” Lauren sends her a toothy smile, and Camila’s stomach does a somersault. “Anyways, if there’s anything you don’t get about the game, I’ll explain the rules.”

Camila shrugs. “I’m sure I’ll catch on.”

“Okay, suit yourself,” Lauren shrugs, and spots Ally, speeding ahead of Camila with a grin. “Hey, Ally!”

Camila lags behind a little, walking slowly, and taking a good look at the team. She sees a few people whispering and looking at Lauren, and bristles. If they’re saying anything negative, she’ll push past her social awkwardness and defend her. She gets a little closer and listens in to one of their conversations.

“That’s Lauren,” an admittedly rather pretty brunette is telling the younger looking girl next to her. “She won every single game for us one season. She’s like, kind of a legend. It’s so sad what happened to her.”

The freshman girl frowns. “She looks happy enough.”

Camila smiles at that. Lauren is happy, and that’s partly because of her.

The older girl shrugs. “Yeah, but apparently, she had like, actual scouts looking at her. For her to play professionally. I mean, she told me it wasn’t what she wanted to do, but still, I’d hate to lose that opportunity.”

Camila’s smile fades a little. Lauren hadn’t mentioned that. Just that she had to work hard to get a different scholarship.

“Oh, are you guys friends?” The younger girl asks. “If she told you about the scouts?”

“We used to be acquainted, but I was closer to her girlfriend, Lucy,” the girl says, and Camila decides she doesn’t like hearing someone else being referred to as Lauren’s girlfriend. “She, uh, passed away in the crash that hurt Lauren.”

Camila decides she doesn’t want to hear any more, and goes to join her girlfriend – _hers_ , not anybody else’s – and her friends. “Hi.”

“What kept you?” Lauren asks, green eyes bright and vibrant. Camila has noticed that when she’s especially happy, her eyes are always extra bright. When she’s upset, they have a dull, almost greyish hue.

“Oh, nothing, I was just daydreaming,” Camila shrugs, squeezing Lauren’s shoulder. “You look happy.”

“I am,” Lauren tells her. “I’m always happy lately, and you’re a big part of that.”

Camila blushes, and Lauren bites down on her bottom lip to conceal her smile. “You really mean that?”

“Yeah,” Lauren nods. “I mean, I was happy before I met you, and that was amplified by like, ten thousand. So that’s all you.”

Dinah mock gags. “Oh my god, you two are the fucking cheesiest.”

“You and Mani were bad when you were in the early stages,” Ally defends them. “Let them have their cheesy honeymoon stage.”

“Um, Ally, it’s nearly been two months since our first date.” Lauren points out. “Safe to say we’re over the honeymoon stage.”

“Yeah, they’re just naturally cheesy,” Normani says, “like Dinah’s feet.”

“Hey!” Dinah lightly smacks her on the arm. “Rude. You love me.”

Normani hums. “Yeah, sometimes.”

“Anyways, thanks for saving two seats, but I brought my own,” Lauren says, and nods to Camila. “Sit there. I want to hold your hand while we watch.”

Camila sits down, and rolls her eyes when Lauren moves backwards, letting out loud beeping noises and yelling “careful, I’m parallel parking!”

She bites back her fond smile and kisses Lauren’s cheek when her girl is next to her. “You’re such a dork.”

Lauren shrugs and twists around to kiss her properly. “A dork that you _like_.”

“Yeah,” Camila agrees, and takes Lauren’s hand, squeezing it tight. “I’m looking forward to watching the game with you. Even though I don’t know anything about softball, it’s something you love, and I want to do things you love with you.”

Lauren blushes. “You mean that?”

“Yeah,” Camila nods, “like, I don’t know, I love hearing about your coin collection and what weird new coins you’ve found, or whatever new things have happened in the sports you like, or if your favourite bands have brought out new music. I may not know anything about those things, but you love them, so I want to hear about them.”

Lauren stares at her in surprise for a moment, and Camila knows that Normani is watching them carefully. After a few seconds, Lauren wraps her arms around Camila in a hug and buries her face into her neck.

“You mean so much to me,” Lauren murmurs against her, “nobody has ever said anything so… so perfect before. Nobody has ever been as perfect.”

Camila’s stomach flips and her heart flutters, because she’s falling so hard and so fast. _Nobody has ever been as perfect._ What about Lucy? Isn’t she Lauren’s soulmate, while Camila is the closest thing she can get to that?

“That means a lot,” Camila says as Lauren pulls away. Her heart is warm when Lauren kisses her. “You’re just… really good to me.”

Lauren opens her mouth to reply, but a whistle blows, and the game starts. Camila feels Lauren squeeze her hand, and she looks towards the pitch too.

She realises as the game progresses, that she should’ve asked Lauren to explain the rules of the game after all. Camila studies Lauren more than the game – honestly, she doesn’t know what’s going on, but she knows that her school is losing by a small margin, and Lauren looks incredibly irritated. When one of the girls falls and twists her ankle, and the team evidently doesn’t have a sub for her as they’d already sent two on, Lauren disappears from Camila’s side without warning.

“Hey, Laur, where are you going?” Camila calls after her, but Lauren acts like she hadn’t heard her and starts talking to the coach, who calls a timeout in the game.

Camila turns to Dinah when Lauren and the coach disappear into a building nearby as the rest of the team huddles. “Where’s she going?”

Dinah frowns. “I don’t know.”

“She’ll be back in a minute, I’m sure,” Ally says with a smile, “she’s probably just asking the coach about something important.”

“Um… I don’t think that’s what it was.” Normani stares at the building Lauren and the coach had gone into, and Camila follows her gaze. “Is she… is she in her old uniform?”

“No,” Dinah shakes her head, “she’s not… she’s not going to play, is she?”

Sure enough, without casting a glance over at Camila or the other girls, Lauren pushes herself onto the pitch. Another one of the girls hesitantly passes her a bat, and Camila watches in shock as Lauren takes the place of the girl who’d twisted her ankle.

Camila doesn’t quite believe what she’s seeing, but Lauren hits the ball that’s pitched to her and goes faster than Camila has ever seen her go. Considering she doesn’t know what’s going on, she knows it’s good when Lauren gets around all of the bases before the other team still haven’t thrown the ball to the ones on the bases.

Their side of the crowd cheers, Dinah and Normani exceptionally loudly, and Camila takes a few seconds to realise that they’d won. That _Lauren_ had won.

She stands up to run and give her girlfriend a hug, but the team gets there first. They lift Lauren out of her chair and onto their shoulders, and Camila feels Normani grab her arm. “Let them celebrate.”

Camila nods and sits back down next to the girls. “I can’t believe she did that.”

“Neither can I,” Dinah replies, “I didn’t think she would ever…”

“That’s Lauren for you,” Ally shrugs, “she’s determined.”

Camila watches as the team help Lauren down, and she’s about to go over for a second time when Lauren’s old coach takes her off to the side. She watches, and after a few moments of talking, Lauren finally comes back over to them.

“I feel like I’m high,” is the first thing she says, and then Normani practically pounces on her and pulls her in for a hug. “Whoa, hey.”

“I’m proud of you,” Normani murmurs, and Camila swears she sees Lauren’s cheeks go pink in embarrassment. “I’m really, really proud of you.”

Lauren shrugs her off. “Cool it with the affection, Mani. Camz will think you’re trying to steal me away.”

“Normani Kordei, miss steal your girl. You’d better not be dumping me.” Dinah jokes, and shoots a look over at Camila, smirking. “Or I’ll go for Walz.”

“She doesn’t have to worry about that,” Lauren says, squeezing Ally’s hand as she passes her. “Camz knows I only have eyes for her. I’ll, uh, be right back, okay?”

Camila frowns. “Wait.”

Lauren pauses and turns around. “Yeah?”

Camila finally gets to hug her girlfriend, and she presses a soft kiss to Lauren’s temple. “You were amazing out there. Honestly… it was really hot.”

Lauren blinks in surprise. “Really?”

“Really,” Camila confirms. “You’re just… amazing.”

Lauren kisses her. “I’ll be right back, okay? Literally two seconds.”

“Okay,” Camila nods, and watches as Lauren disappears, only to return a few minutes later, still in the softball gear. Camila can see _Jauregui_ on the back at the top of her shirt, as well as a number five on the front. This time, however, Lauren is carrying a bag in her lap. “What’s that?”

“My clothes,” Lauren answers. “Well, come on. That was fun, but I want to grab something to eat.”

They agree to meet at Pizza Hut, to Camila’s utmost joy. Since Dinah, Ally and Normani had all come in Ally’s car, that leaves Camila to drive herself and Lauren to the restaurant. She helps Lauren into the car, and folds up her chair, leaving it across the backseat. Then, Camila gets into the driver’s side and starts the car.

“He offered me my old position back.”

Camila blinks in confusion. “What?”

“Coach Cowell,” Lauren elaborates. “He says if I’d be willing to come back to school I’d get my old position back. Captain status and everything. I guess they really need the help. Taylor won’t like that news.”

“That’s- that’s amazing,” Camila has to pull over, because she’s too busy staring at Lauren in shock to drive. “You said yes, right?”

Lauren sighs. “I said I’d think about it.”

“What?” Camila frowns. “There’s nothing to think about. You love softball and you’re getting the chance to play again but you’re considering throwing that away?”

“It would mean a lot of different things,” Lauren murmurs, “coming back to school would mean facing everyone and having to deal with the pitying glances all of the time. And taking my old position back… people would look at me and think it’s pity. They’d think I didn’t earn it.”

“Oh my god, Lauren,” Camila huffs. “You’re not turning this down on the basis that _other people_ might think you didn’t earn it, because you clearly have. You worked hard to be captain before, and you’re still going to work hard. The evidence will come about in the games, and your coach wouldn’t offer you it back if he didn’t think you weren’t capable. Stop being so proud and just _do_ it.”

Lauren is silent for a moment, and then she sighs and says. “I’ll think about it. And I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell the girls just yet.”

“Okay,” Camila nods, “but only if you’re really going to think about it.”

“I will,” Lauren assures her. “Now, come on. I’m hungry.”

Camila looks at Lauren for a few more moments before she starts driving.

-

A week passes, and Lauren still hasn’t said anything about her decision, at least to Camila, so Camila figures she’s probably passed it up. It’s unfortunate, but Camila isn’t going to judge Lauren’s choice.

She has plans to go and see her later, and with that in mind, she gets ready for school with a smile. Her mom drops her off and she heads to her locker, going through it for the book she needs for her first class.

“You seriously need to tidy your locker.”

At the familiar raspy voice, Camila jumps, and spins around. Her eyes lock on her girlfriend, smirking up at her. “Lauren?”

“The one and only,” Lauren smiles at her. “Hi.”

“What’re you- but you-” Camila stares at her, “you don’t even go here.”

Lauren laughs, and Camila swears she mutters _she doesn’t even go here_ under her breath. “I do now. I thought it over and you were right. I love softball too much to pass this up. So here I am.”

Camila pulls Lauren in for a hug, and the older Latina kisses her cheek. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

“Yeah, well,” Lauren shrugs and pats her lap, “find whatever you need and I’ll give you a ride to your first class. Either that or we can go find the girls and surprise them. I haven’t exactly mentioned anything about being here.”

Camila nods, and grabs the book she needs, closing her locker and sitting on her girlfriend’s lap. She kisses Lauren’s cheek as she moves them forwards. “We should surprise Dinah. Her locker isn’t too far away.”

“Sure,” Lauren nods. “I remember where it was. I found yours on a lucky guess.”

Camila raises an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“Since you moved here recently, I figured you’d have one of the two possible available lockers,” Lauren explains, “my old one or Lucy’s. You have mine.”

“Oh,” Camila blinks, “you- um, you can have it back…”

Lauren laughs. “Camz, I can’t exactly reach it anymore. I need one of the lower ones. Besides, I couldn’t ask for a better person to have it.”

Camila smiles and kisses Lauren’s temple. “Thanks. You’re a sweetheart.”

Lauren grins at her. “Well, I am pretty good with the ladies.”

Camila spots Dinah, and grins. “Hey, DJ, what’s up?”

“Hey, Walz,” Dinah turns around, and when she spots Camila on Lauren’s lap, her eyes practically pop out of their sockets. “Ralph? The fuck you doing here?”

“Because of the softball game the other week, coach offered me my old position back.” Lauren explains. “Said the team had gone downhill ever since I left, which is obviously true due to the _tragic_ performance in that game. Clearly they need a good captain. Good thing they’ve got one now.”

“Lo!” Dinah pulls her in for a hug, “I’m so proud of you.”

Camila sees the pink in Lauren’s cheeks. “You don’t need to be proud. Besides, thank Camila. I wouldn’t have agreed if it weren’t for her.”

“Wait, for real?” Camila frowns. “It’s really because of me?”

“Yeah,” Lauren nods, and Dinah smirks at the two of them before she disappears off, probably to meet Normani and tell her the news before Lauren and Camila can. “The things you said after the game, you made me realise that I shouldn’t care what anyone else thinks. Besides, if they voice their idiotic opinions, I’ll run over their toes like I did with Taylor.”

Camila laughs. “I’m glad I helped you.”

“You’re good for me,” Lauren tells her, and Camila’s heart soars. “Mani’s constantly saying that. I agree with her. Especially because of this.”

Camila blushes. “I’m glad you both think that. I’d like to think I make you happy.”

“You make me _so_ happy,” Lauren agrees, squeezing her hand. “I don’t know if Mani told you, but I was constantly complaining about how much I missed softball. So… this is good. And it’s pretty much all down to you.”

Camila rolls her eyes. “ _That_ is where you’re wrong. It’s down to you going out onto that pitch and helping them out. If you hadn’t, then you wouldn’t have been offered the position in the first place. I just helped give you a little nudge when you weren’t sure.”

Lauren sighs. “I _am_ going to miss being homeschooled. There were days when I didn’t wake up until four in the afternoon. Glorious.”

Camila laughs. “Whatever. Sleeping late like that isn’t good for you, apparently.”

“You do it every weekend,” Lauren points out, “I literally have to show up at your house if I want to spend time with you before five in the afternoon.”

Camila rolls her eyes. “Not _every_ weekend. Just most of them.”

“Nope,” Laurena argues. “Every weekend.”

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

At the voice, Camila hears a hint of familiarity. Clearly, Lauren identifies it, because she rolls her eyes and turns around. “To what do I owe the pleasure, Taylor?”

“You can’t just take my place as captain of the team.” Taylor argues, and Lauren glances over at Camila with a look that reads _I told you she wouldn’t like this_. “We’re _fine_ without you. Just because you’re _you_ doesn’t mean you should get back on the team.”

“Wasn’t my decision,” Lauren lazily replies, “Take it up with Coach if you’re really that stressed about it.”

“I have,” Taylor snaps. “I told him it wasn’t fair, but he didn’t care at all.”

“Probably because of the way you guys were playing the other week,” Lauren shrugs. “I’d be pretty depressed if my new captain made my team suck that bad. No wonder he wants me back.”

Camila bites down on her bottom lip to supress a laugh, but it doesn’t work as well as she’d anticipated, because she ends up letting out a snicker that Taylor picks up on, which puts Camila on the receiving end of the glare. “Who the fuck are you?”

“That’s my girlfriend and you shouldn’t fucking talk to her like that,” Lauren sends her a look that could kill, which makes Camila think that maybe Lauren _is_ intimidating after all. “You’ve got a problem with me, don’t take it out on her. It’s not my fault you suck at captaining, okay? It’s not for everyone.”

“You shouldn’t even be on the team, let alone replacing me as _captain_ ,” Taylor spits out, “you’re nothing more than a fucking cripple.”

That’s enough for Camila. Before she thinks about it, her fist connects with Taylor’s jaw and a pain shoots through it. The only thing that comforts her is the fact that Taylor’s face is probably hurting a lot more than her hand is right now.

“Don’t you _ever_ call her that again,” Camila glares, the fire behind her eyes turning them a deep amber as opposed to their usual brown. “If you say _anything_ like that again, you’ll have me to answer to, and I’m not afraid to hit you again. Come on, Lauren.”

Camila turns and walks away, and after a few seconds of shock, Lauren follows her.

_“Camila_ ,” Lauren looks at her with wide eyes. “Who- what- _how_?”

Camila keeps her mouth shut until they turn the corner. Then, she lets out a pained whimper and stares down at her hand. “Oh my god. I didn’t know punching people could hurt the _puncher_. Thought it was just the _punchee_ that suffered.”

“I didn’t know you could- but- what happened to awkward, nervous around people Camila?” Lauren is still looking at her in shock. “The _fuck_?”

“She- she said- I’m not saying that word because it makes me so mad and she said it to hurt you,” Camila shakily explains, trying to ignore the throbbing in her hand. “That word was said with the purpose of hurting you for something you can’t help. It made me so _mad_.”

“That was…” Lauren looks at her in awe. “You’re a _badass_ , Camz.”

Camila is a little shocked at her own actions, but she doesn’t regret them. “I was defending you.”

Lauren looks down at her feet and then lets out a laugh. “I can’t believe you just punched someone for me.”

“You’re _not_ what she said and it made me mad,” Camila says, “but can we get some ice on my hand or something?”

“Oh, right,” Lauren nods, “Nurse’s office. And Camila? Even though it was awesome, you don’t need to punch people for me. That word doesn’t hurt me. I honestly feel bad for Taylor, like, she is completely able-bodied and I’d still kick her ass at softball. Like, damn, girl, if I’m a cripple, what’re _you_?”

“Don’t call yourself that,” Camila sighs, “because you’re always talking about how you’re not broken and-”

“And I’m not,” Lauren finishes for her with a light-hearted shrug and one of her adorably toothy grins. “Sure, if she’d called me that right after the accident, it really would’ve messed me up because I wasn’t okay and I hadn’t accepted that this is permanent. But you’re right, I’m not broken, and by believing that, I know she’s wrong – that anyone who uses that word is wrong.”

Camila sighs, but she’s a little comforted when Lauren kisses her throbbing hand. “You’re really not upset?”

“No, I’m not,” Lauren assures her, “let’s go to the nurse’s office and get some ice on your hand.”

Camila nods, and lets Lauren lead her to the nurse’s office; she’s never been there before, so she’s not entirely sure where to go. Lauren assures her that the nurse is nice, that she used to go frequently when it came to softball accidents.

“Like, look here,” Lauren says, and she pulls a rip in her jeans up to show a scar on her left knee. “I tripped up and cut open my knee while running between bases during a practice. Me being an idiot, I decided it’d be fine, and didn’t even bother _cleaning_ it. Naturally, it ended up infected and the nurse patched me up. She was even nice enough not to slap me upside the head for not cleaning the large gash in my knee.”

Camila laughs. “Yeah, you are an idiot.”

“Hey!” Lauren pouts. “I’m trying to make you feel better here.”

“You’re the one who just got a slur casually thrown at her,” Camila points out. “I should be comforting you.”

“Trust me, you comforted me enough by punching her,” Lauren laughs. “I’m _never_ going to forget that.”

Camila kisses her. “Good. I’m glad you’re okay.”

“Of course I am,” Lauren assures her. “I’m always okay.”

-

Camila has seen a lot of adorable things before. Like, there’s her little sister, who is infinitely adorable. There’s Lauren. There are small animals, like puppies and kittens. But this one tops them all.

Lauren Jauregui, laid out on a couch, giggling as a little puppy tries to lick her face.

“Leo, no,” Lauren laughs, turning her head from side to side to avoid the puppy’s tongue. “Get off, stop attacking mama!”

Camila’s heart flutters. _Mama_. Lauren just referred to herself as her dog’s mother. _Adorable_. “Having fun, Laur?”

“Camz!” Lauren laughs from the couch. “Come save me!”

“Was this the surprise you mentioned over text?” Camila asks with a laugh. “You got a dog?”

“Not just _any_ dog,” Lauren giggles as the puppy licks her nose. “The _Lick-o-nater 5000_.”

Camila manages to restrain the dog, but he wiggles around a lot in her grip. “What’d you call him? Or is that Lick-o-whatever his actual name?”

“His name is Leo,” Lauren says, sitting up and wiping the slobber from her face. “He’s a little baby. Mom brought him home last night and surprised me completely. Mani named him.”

Camila puts the dog back on Lauren’s lap as she gets herself upright. “He’s adorable. My dog back home is called Leo.”

Lauren laughs and kisses her. “Just all the more evidence that we’re meant to be.”

Camila’s heart flutters again, because _goddamn it,_ she knows she’s in love. She knows it and it’s killing her because she doesn’t know when or if she can say it. The last thing she wants is to freak Lauren out.

“Yeah,” is Camila’s meagre response. “Um, so, what’s the plan?”

“Well, I figured we could play with Leo for a little while before school,” Lauren shrugs, “I wanted you to meet him, because you’re technically his mom, too. At least, you’re dating his mama.”

Camila snorts. “Alright, sure, I guess we have a kid now. Don’t you think that’s a little too soon?”

Lauren shrugs. “We’re two girls. We’ve got to fulfil the U-Haul trope.”

Camila laughs and pulls Lauren in for a tight hug. “Are you nervous for softball practice today?”

It’s Lauren’s first practice as captain after the match last month, as there wasn’t one scheduled for last week when she came back to school.

“No. I’m okay,” Lauren tells her, but Camila figures she’s not telling the entire truth. “I mean, I’m kind of jumpy, but… I’ll be fine.”

Camila kisses her. “I’ll be here for you. And so will Leo. He’ll nip at the ankles of anyone who’s mean to you. Guard puppy.”

Lauren laughs. “Well, duh, that’s why I got him.”

It doesn’t seem like long before they have to head to school – Camila getting a ride with Lauren and her mother, and sitting in the back with Lauren’s chair. It seems like seconds after they arrive, a girl joins them.

Camila recognises her as the brunette girl she’d seen talking about Lauren at the match. “Hey, Laur. We’re all stoked to have you back.”

Lauren’s eyes rake over the girl. “Hi, Keana. How’ve you been?”

“I’m okay,” Keana says, “what about you? Last time I saw you, you were throwing tantrums every other minute. Got over yourself yet?”

“Watch it,” Lauren scolds her, but it’s more playful than anything. “I could kick you off the team.”

“You wouldn’t,” Keana laughs, “I heard about what happened with Taylor and the rest of the team and I decided we wanted her out. Unless, you know, you wanted her in?”

“Hell no,” Lauren replies, “it’s good to see you again.”

“You too,” Keana grins. “You single still?”

“Um, no,” Lauren looks up and catches the irritated expression on Camila’s face. “This is my girlfriend, Camila. Camz, this is Keana. We’ve known each other since we were thirteen and playing softball in middle school.”

Camila’s glare doesn’t waver. “Hi.”

Keana laughs. “Okay, I get it, she’s yours.”

Lauren sends Camila a teasing grin. “Camz, it’s fine. I’m all yours and you know it.”

“Yeah,” Camila breathes out, but secretly decides she doesn’t like Keana. “I know.”

Lauren squeezes her hand and flashes Keana a smile. “Anyway, I’ll see you at practice later. Be ready to win your next game.”

Keana grins. “Trust me, when everyone heard you were coming back, they wanted to celebrate then and there. Even the freshmen. They know you’re a legend.”

Lauren blushes, and Camila finally cracks a smile. “I- I wouldn’t call myself that.”

“I would,” Camila says, “if the way you played last time was any indication of how good you were _before_ … living legend. That’s you.”

If anything, Lauren blushes even more profusely.

The day goes slower than usual; ever since Lauren had been back at school, days had been flying by, so this is weird for Camila. She’d promised to go to Lauren’s softball practice and watch, so she thinks it’s because she’s looking forward to it so much. She’s decided that watching Lauren play is her favourite thing; she’d even begged Lauren to let her wear her bomber jacket, the one that looks _kind of_ like a letterman one, just so she could tell everyone her girlfriend is a jock.

Of course, Lauren had just laughed at that and said Camila could wear her jersey instead, and Camila practically melted then and there.

When the last bell rings and they head to practice, Camila is the excitable one. “I just really like watching you play.”

“It’s _practice_ , not a game,” Lauren points out. “You might get bored.”

Camila shakes her head. “Nope. Not if you’ll be all cute and happy.”

“I can’t be cute,” Lauren rolls her eyes, “I’ve got to boss them around. To _them_ I’ve got to be scary.”

“Everyone knows you’re a puppy,” Camila says, “a freshman girl told me you showed her where something is and that you’re really sweet and I could’ve sworn she was one of the reserves in the game.”

Lauren blushes. “It costs nothing to be nice.”

Camila smiles and kisses the top of Lauren’s head. “Do you have to get into your softball clothes?”

“Yeah,” Lauren nods. “Wait out on the pitch for me, okay?”

“I will,” Camila assures her, “see you in a minute.”

Camila goes outside, and a few of the softball girls are already there. They smile at her, and she waves back happily, before sitting down on the closest bench to the pitch. Eventually, all of the girls are out, and Lauren comes out, flashing Camila a soft smile before turning to her team.

Camila doesn’t follow what’s going on, but Lauren has them all hanging off her every word as she talks, and whatever she’s saying has the same effect on Camila. As she talks them through drills, comments on techniques, Camila thinks that maybe she’ll join the softball team so her extracurricular activities are _drooling over Lauren Jauregui_.

Seeing Lauren all domineering and ordering her team around and doing the drills… even though Camila has no idea what she’s talking about, she loves it. Lauren looks so happy, and at the same time, the way she’s so in control is so _hot_.

“Alright, good practice,” Lauren announces, and Camila snaps out of whatever trance she was in. It’s over already? “We’re going to be moving it up to twice a week, though. Once isn’t going to get us anywhere if we want to repair whatever damage Taylor did.”

Once the team disperses, and Lauren goes over to Camila, it’s like a switch has flipped. Lauren goes back to being her adorably dorky girlfriend. “Hey. I’m going to head back into the locker rooms and get my stuff, and then we can-”

Camila cuts her off with a kiss. “Can I come to every practice?”

Lauren blinks in surprise. “Sure?”

Camila smiles, and stands up. “Locker rooms it is.”

By the time they get in, most of the girls have gone – they generally go home in their softball uniforms – and Lauren says goodbye to a few last minute stragglers. Camila watches as Lauren digs through a locker for her gym bag, and then turns to Camila with a smile.

“Alright, let’s go,” Lauren says, and Camila shakes her head, sitting on one of the benches. “What’s wrong?”

Camila doesn’t reply. Instead, she cups Lauren’s face and kisses her. Lauren blinks in surprise, but quickly reciprocates, loving how Camila’s lips seem moulded just for hers, and how even the slightest touch from her girlfriend seems to set her nerves alight.

When Lauren pulls away, she smiles. “What’s that for?”

“I- I just,” Camila sighs, “it’s really hot. This softball thing.”

Lauren laughs. “You hate sports.”

“Apparently I like girls who play them, though,” Camila admits with a blush, “do you have any footage of your old games? Can I watch?”

Lauren bites down on her bottom lip to hide her fond smile. “Come on. Home time. My mom will be waiting and I don’t think she has patience for the making out in the locker rooms trope.”

Just as Lauren predicted, Clara is waiting for them, and they head back to Lauren’s with Camila feeling equally as excited. Hopefully Lauren will show her footage of old games. Even if she’s not going to show her that, she can _at least_ let her see how good her ass is in those softball pants.

When they get in, Camila piggybacks Lauren to the couch and then sends her a pleading look. “Old games?”

Lauren relents. “Fine. There should be some home movies in the drawer on the TV stand. I don’t know what’s what, my mom got them all converted to DVD’s and forgot to label them.”

Camila grins, and digs around in the drawer for the DVDs, pulling whatever looks like a home movie out. “Alright. Shall I just put one in?”

Lauren nods, so Camila grabs a disk at random and puts it in the DVD player. Then she sits down, and Lauren presses _play_ on the remote.

It’s not a softball game, and honestly, it’s topped everything in existence for the cutest thing Camila has ever seen, because it’s _Lauren as a kid_.

“Not softball,” Lauren stops it, “try the next one.”

“No!” Camila shakes her head. “I have to see that. Show me it.”

Lauren rolls her eyes, but she’s smiling, and presses play.

_“Mami!”_ Little Lauren squeals. “ _Play!”_

“How old were you?” Camila asks, _awing_ when little Lauren stands up and grabs her Nala from Clara. “You look tiny.”

Lauren shrugs. “Probably around five.”

“Oh my god,” Camila’s jaw drops when little Lauren yawns. “This is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.”

Lauren laughs. “It’s not-”

“Don’t you _dare_ say it’s not cute,” Camila cuts in. “Oh my god, look at you! _You’re_ the little chicken.”

“No,” Lauren pouts, “I’m the mother hen.”

Camila laughs and kisses her. “I can’t take you seriously when baby Lauren is running around in her underwear. _Only_ her underwear.”

Lauren’s eyes widen and she looks over at the screen, quickly shutting the video off. “Nope. Not watching anymore of that.”

Camila pouts. “It was cute.”

“You’re _supposed_ to think I’m badass.” Lauren sighs. “But I guess that image is tarnished forever.”

“Mhm,” Camila grins, “another one.”

“Fine,” Lauren folds her arms across her chest. “Go put it in.”

Camila stands up and heads over to the DVD player, regretfully taking out the disk of baby Lauren and putting in another one. She sits back down, and Lauren presses play. This time, it’s a softball game, and Camila is completely enraptured in it.

She has to keep turning to Lauren to ask _are you winning_ , to which the older girl replies with a distracted _mhm_ each time. Every time Lauren runs for something, Camila is surprised by just how _fast_ she is. It makes her heart warm.

“Hey,” Camila nudges her girlfriend, “if this is like, upsetting you or anything…”

“Why would it upset me?” Lauren laughs. “I’m awesome. If it weren’t for me, they’d all get their asses kicked. Sure, maybe if I wasn’t back on the team I’d be all depressed right now, but you wouldn’t have asked to watch these if I wasn’t anyway.”

Camila hums at her girlfriend’s logic, and rests her head on Lauren’s shoulder as they watch the game together.

-

_Lauren wakes up with a groan._

_She reaches up and rubs at her eyes, but that does nothing to get rid of the blur in her vision. She sits up, looking around her bedroom, and remembers that last night, she’d had Lucy over, but as she looks to the right, her girlfriend isn’t there anymore and her side of the bed is cold._

_It hurts that she left, but Lauren figures she probably had a good reason to. She stretches and lets out a yawn, before she rolls over and checks her clock. 6:57AM. She’d woken up three minutes before her alarm. Typical._

_She skips her morning shower on Friday, since she has softball practice after school and is going to shower after that – she kind of has to, even if she’d rather go home and shower. Lucy is picking her up after softball practice for their Friday date night, and she always complains about practice before a date. She’d wanted Lauren to quit, but Lauren had refused point-blank._

_She gets out of bed and stretches, walking over to her dresser to grab some clothes. She throws on some ripped jeans and a t-shirt, and decides she’ll just throw her bomber jacket on over it. She goes into her bathroom and brushes her teeth, applying a little makeup and putting it in her bag for after practice so Lucy won’t complain._

_She goes into the kitchen next, greeting her little sister with a morning hug, and making herself a bowl of Cheerios. She wolfs down her breakfast, and makes sure everything is in her backpack for school, before heading out of the door and into the driveway, unlocking her car._

_She sits in the driver’s seat for a few minutes, checking her phone for any message from Lucy, but her girlfriend hadn’t responded to the message Lauren had sent when she woke up. Thankfully, she doesn’t need to drive, because Lucy tells her she’ll do it, but Lauren has to walk there if she wants a ride._

_She does it, because she likes going to school hand in hand with her girl._

_When Lucy opens the front door, she sends Lauren a smile and kisses her cheek. “I’m glad you didn’t drive yourself, babe. I guess you’ve finally got some common sense?”_

_Lauren lets out a laugh. Lucy says she doesn’t trust Lauren’s driving, which initially she’d taken offense to, but she wants to keep Lucy happy, so she didn’t bother arguing. She gets in the passenger seat of her car, and Lucy drives the two of them to school, tucking the car keys into her pocket when they get out._

_“I’m going to keep the keys, babe,” Lucy tells her, “I’ll drive round to the field at the end of your practice and pick you up.”_

_“Okay,” Lauren nods, because she doesn’t want to cause a fight. “Oh, did I tell you about the coin my mom found the other day? It turns out it was actually worth-”_

_“Oh my god, Lauren,” Lucy sighs, “how many times do I have to tell you, I don’t care about your stupid coins. They’re just coins, they’re there to be spent, not kept in some weird book.”_

_Lauren deflates, but nods. She wanted to tell Lucy about it, because it’s probably the best coin she’s ever found, and it’s worth around three thousand dollars. She thought that’d be exciting. “Okay.”_

_“Anyways, I’m sorry I left last night,” Lucy shrugs, “I just needed to be in my own bed. Besides, your mom stifles me.”_

_Lauren sends her a puzzled look. “She stifles you?”_

_“Yeah, she’s just too nice, you know?” Lucy answers. “It’s creepy. Anyway, there’s this party tonight. You want to go?”_

_Lauren sighs. She’d been hoping for a quiet night in. “Um, not really…”_

_“Let me try that again,” Lucy smiles at her, “we’re going to a party tonight. It starts late, so you’ll be able to treat me to dinner like usual. And later, I’ll treat you to something else.”_

_Lauren raises her eyebrows. “What?”_

_Lucy smirks. “You’ll see.”_

_-_

_“Good practice, guys,” Lauren smiles at her teammates. “We’re going to kick ass in the first game.”_

_As everyone heads into the changing rooms, Lauren smiles to herself. She’s just so happy, in all honesty, and that’s down to softball. Softball and Lucy, her two loves._

_She heads into the changing rooms herself, and showers off for her date with Lucy – they’re going straight to the restaurant after this – before getting into her nicer clothes. She heads outside, expecting to see Lucy and her car there, but her girl is nowhere to be seen. She sighs, and sits down on one of the benches in the stands._

_“Hey.”_

_Lauren jumps a little when she hears the voice, and she looks over to see Keana, her left fielder. “Hi. I thought I was the only one left.”_

_“Nope,” Keana smiles at her, sitting down next to Lauren on one of the benches. Lauren frowns when she feels Keana squeeze her knee. “You’re a really great captain, Laur. I’m sure we’re going to have a great season.”_

_“Um, yeah,” Lauren moves away slightly. “Are you waiting to be picked up? My girlfriend was supposed to be here, but she’s a little late.”_

_Keana sighs a little. “If only you were single.”_

_Lauren frowns even more. “Aren’t you straight? And- uh, one of Lucy’s best friends?”_

_Keana raises her eyebrows. “She doesn’t need to know.”_

_When she realises Keana is leaning in, Lauren jumps up and shakes her head, stumbling backwards a little. “Um, sorry, but I’m not- I don’t- I only want her, okay? Ever.”_

_Keana shrugs. “Alright. That’s your choice.”_

_Lauren nods, and decides she’s going to go anywhere Keana isn’t, deciding to wait by the road for Lucy instead. She’s heading across when she spots Dinah and Normani walking down the sidewalk, hand in hand, and her heart aches. She misses them a lot, but she’s_ not _apologising. She’s not the one who needs to. Normani is the one who should apologise, and she should apologise to Lucy, especially after all of the things she said._

_They spot her, and Lauren keeps her expression cold and stony, refusing to make eye contact. Thankfully, she doesn’t have to, because Lucy pulls up, so she walks straight past Dinah and Normani and gets in the car, letting out a breath she didn’t know she was holding when Lucy starts to drive._

_Once they’re at the restaurant, eating and talking and laughing, Lauren feels a lot better, and when Lucy suggests a walk on the beach, she nods in agreement. Running around on the sand and dipping their feet in the sea makes Lauren relax entirely, so much that she’s actually looking forward to the party Lucy wants to go to._

_After taking a few dorky selfies that Lauren sets as her wallpaper, Lucy stretches and takes Lauren’s hand. “Come on. Let’s go back to my place.”_

_Lauren recognises the glint in Lucy’s eyes and smirks. “Okay. Let’s go back to your place.”_

_Lauren stands up, loving the feeling of the sand between her toes, and follows Lucy off the beach, where she pulls her sneakers back on and follows her girlfriend to the car. She buckles herself in, and lets out a sigh of content. Honestly, life couldn’t get much better._

_She has the perfect girlfriend, an athletic scholarship, and she’s going to get high as fuck tonight to celebrate._

_She turns and smiles at Lucy, and her girlfriend’s side profile is the last thing she sees before she hears a loud_ snap _and everything goes black_.

-

_Lauren wakes up with a groan._

_She feels weird. Heavy, almost. Everything seems muffled except a regular beeping next to her, and what she thinks is her mother’s voice._

_“Oh, Lauren, baby, you’re awake,” she feels Clara’s warm, shaky hand touch her cheek, and Lauren’s eyes flutter open properly. “Mike, she’s awake!”_

_Her dad sprints into the room, and Lauren frowns, her mother coming in and out of focus._

_“What’s—where am I?” Lauren blinks, and tries to sit up, but a pain shoots down her spine and she gasps. “Where am I?”_

_Mike takes her hand. “You’re in the hospital. You were in a car accident.”_

_“I was…” Lauren trails off, but her memory is fogged. She tries sitting up again, slower this time, and all she feels is pain. Her ribs feel broken, her arms are bruised, her back is positively killing, and her legs—_

_That’s when she realises. She can’t feel her legs._

_Her stomach drops and her throat closes over. No. No, that’s got to be some kind of trick. She hit her head and her brain is messing her up. This is a nightmare, it has to be._

_“Mom, mom, I can’t-” Lauren breathes out, and tries to kick out, to move her leg to the side,_ anything _. Her legs stay perfectly stationary, the only part of her body that isn’t hurting, but she’d rather have them hurting than_ this _. God, she’d rather have anything than this._

_She’d rather be dead._

_“Mami, I can’t feel them,” Lauren cries, her vision blurry from her tears rather than sleep. “Mami, please, help.”_

_Clara pulls her in for a delicate hug and Lauren sobs into her mother’s shoulder, trying to kick out, to move, to do anything. She can’t even wiggle her toes. It feels like her whole world is over._

_“It- it’ll come back, right?” Lauren keeps trying to kick. “They’ll come back. I can- I’m not- I’m fine! It’ll come back.”_

_Clara and Mike exchange a look. Mike is the one to talk, and there are tears in his eyes, too. “Listen, honey, the doctors, they said you had a spinal injury. There might be- there might be treatment depending on the extent of the injury but it’s… I’m so sorry, Lauren. It’s likely that this is permanent.”_

_Lauren’s heart seems to stop at that word. Permanent. No, she can’t be stuck like this. She just_ can’t _. She has her scholarship and softball. Lucy needs to be able to tickle her feet to annoy her. Lucy—_

_When Lauren’s heart restarts, it goes into overdrive. “Lucy. Where’s Lucy? Is she okay? She was- oh,_ fuck _, she was in the car! She was- she was-”_

_Clara holds her tighter this time, and it hurts her bruises and her ribs but that’s nothing compared to the pain that hits her at her mother’s words. “Lucy- Lucy passed away, baby. She didn’t make it.”_

_Lauren seems to black out after that – really, she’d gone into hysterics and a nurse had put her to sleep again – but when she wakes up next, she’s only certain of one thing._

_She wishes the crash had taken her, too._

-

Lauren sits bolt upright in bed, her heart pounding against her ribs. When she realises she’s not in the hospital, she’s in her bedroom, it slows down and she lets out a sigh, laying down next to her girlfriend again.

As best as she can, she shifts so she’s flush against Camila, listening to her gentle breaths and smiling and how relaxed her face is in sleep.

“You’re so beautiful,” Lauren murmurs, kissing Camila’s temple and letting out the words she’s too afraid to say when Camila’s eyes are open. “I love you.”

As Lauren closes her eyes again, she moves her hips slightly to get comfortable, now used to the lack of response from her legs. She kisses Camila’s temple and smiles to herself.

The words that tumble out of her lips before she goes back to sleep are addressed to nobody.

“I’m so glad I’m alive.”

-

“I need to talk to you.”

Normani spins around on her desk chair, and Lauren raises her eyebrows at her friend’s shocked reaction. “What’re you doing here? I thought you’d be with Camila.”

“She’s still asleep,” Lauren shrugs, “It’s before noon, what’re you expecting? But anyway, I needed to talk to you.”

“Alright,” Normani nods, and Lauren moves closer, so she’s next to her friend. “What did you need to talk to me about?”

“Lucy.” Lauren says, and Normani’s eyes widen in shock. Any other time Normani has mentioned Lucy, Lauren had gotten angry. It causes fights they never resolve. “Tell me why you hated her. And I’ll listen.”

Normani stares. “Is this a trick? And I didn’t hate her. Just didn’t like her.”

“It’s not a trick.” Lauren replies. “I want you to tell my why you didn’t like her. Tell me everything I refused to hear.”

Normani frowns, and pokes Lauren in the cheek. “So, where’d you put the real Lauren?”

“Mani,” Lauren rolls her eyes, “I’m serious. I need to know.”

Normani shakes her head. “You _needed_ to know. Back when you were with her, when she was still manipulating you. Why do you want to hear it now?”

“I feel guilty,” Lauren admits, sighing. “Like… I know she wasn’t my soulmate. I know that’s Camila. But I feel guilty saying it because of Lucy. Because through my eyes, she was perfect for me.”

Normani stares at her, and Lauren jumps back in shock when her best friend practically jumps on her in a hug. “Oh my god, that’s adorable. Camila’s your soulmate!”

“I’m not here for a parade of shippers congratulating me,” Lauren rolls her eyes, “I need you to help me.”

Normani pulls away and frowns. “By ranting about your ex?”

“In a way,” Lauren nods, “Just… tell me how you saw her. How you saw our relationship. I need to figure things out.”

Normani sighs. “Alright, fine. We might as well get comfortable.”

Lauren rolls her eyes, but gets out of her chair and shifts herself onto Normani’s bed. Normani sits next to her. “Okay. Tell me everything.”

Normani nods. “Well, when you first got together, she took you away from me. I know that’s like, a dumb thing to say, and it just made me sound like a jealous best friend to you, but she took you away from me. Dinah and Ally too. At first it was understandable, because you were in that phase, but you _always_ blew us off. Even if we had plans you’d cancel them because _Lucy_ called.”

“That’s my fault, though,” Lauren points out. “I was the one ditching you.”

“I thought so too. I blamed you until I met her for the first time.” Normani says. “I saw how much power she had over you. Dinah told me to lighten up and it was just because you were _whipped_ , but she was telling you to do things and you’d just do it without question. She told you to shut up when you talked about a show you liked and you just _did_. That was when I knew it wasn’t okay. That it was toxic.”

Lauren bites down on her bottom lip and shrugs. “I just wanted to keep her happy.”

“By censoring yourself,” Normani points out. “If she really cared about you, she would’ve listened to you talk about your dumb coin collection like Mila does.”

“You just called it dumb,” Lauren argues. “You just made your point void.”

“I called it dumb jokingly.” Normani points out. “She didn’t. That was harsh of her.”

“Okay, fine,” Lauren replies, noting that down in her head and silently agreeing. She did wish that Lucy had been more supportive of her interests, but figured it was normal she didn’t care. “What else?”

“She made you quit your after school art club,” Normani continues, “and tried to make you quit softball. I heard you guys talking about that and she was definitely manipulating you. She made it seem like you were being a bad girlfriend or something, just because you had other interests. She would say _oh, Lo, I’m so bored all the time when you’re at your clubs._ And you’d let her walk all over you.”

“She didn’t make me quit,” Lauren defends, before she remembers she’s supposed to be listening, not talking. “She asked me to and I said yes. I didn’t quit softball which is proof enough.”

“You didn’t quit softball because you put up a fight about that,” Normani says, “you didn’t care about the art club so you left. Softball you cared about enough to fight for. But anyway, she had you wrapped around her finger. Anything she wanted, you did. That’s not healthy. Sure, she probably did love you, but not in the right way. She’d always put herself first. If she’d gotten out of the accident unscathed, she wouldn’t still be with you.”

Lauren frowns. “You can’t know that.”

“I can, because unlike you, I wasn’t blinded by love when I analysed her actions.” Normani argues. “She cared about herself and her image. You defended her every move, went around intimidating people for her, snuck into bars and did drugs and smoked with her. She would’ve thought like you did in the hospital. That you being in your wheelchair meant the end of your independence. That would’ve been enough for her to break it off. She would’ve seen you as a burden.”

Lauren mulls this over in her head. A lot of Normani’s points, the part of her that’s still in love with Lucy is refuting. That part of her is saying there’s no way the things Normani has said are true. Every other part – the rational part, the one that deep down has always known this – is agreeing.

“It’s weird,” Lauren says after a few minutes of comfortable silence. “How love can make you see somebody so much differently.”

“I know,” Normani puts an arm around her shoulder and Lauren smiles weakly. “I’m really sorry, Lo.”

“No, don’t be,” Lauren shakes her head. “I think I always knew, deep down, that she wasn’t… that she could be…”

“A bitch?” Normani finishes for her, and Lauren laughs, but shakes her head, because she doesn’t think Lucy was a bitch. “You were always so defensive over her.”

“Because I loved her.” Lauren shrugs simply. “I always thought the stuff she did was normal. That it was just how she was. But then I met Camila and she just… changed everything.”

“You guys are the cutest.” Normani says. “Honestly. And hey, this girlfriend has the best friend’s stamp of approval.”

“Duh,” Lauren laughs. “You practically handed her to me and said _here’s a girl for you to date._ ”

Normani snorts. “I’m not saying I was _trying_ to set you up, but when I saw how nervous Mila got around you when you guys met? I had to. You totally knew she liked you though, right?”

“Of course I did,” Lauren laughs, “I liked her too. Why do you think I turned on the charm?”

“Yeah, instead of being your usual, sullen self,” Normani nudges her, sending her a teasing grin. “I am _really_ happy for you, Lo. Just… you know, I’m happy you’re happy.”

“Before,” Lauren murmurs, “I didn’t think life could get any better. But it has.”

Normani smiles and gives Lauren a comforting squeeze. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” Lauren nods. “Anything.”

“What’d you do?” Normani asks. “You and Lucy. When she manipulated you into drugs and drink and smoking. How much of it did you say yes to.”

“Um…” Lauren shrugs, “I mean… she persuaded me to try any of the drugs she was trying, but the only thing I did frequently was smoke weed. But I did… I did do harder stuff.”

“Thought so,” Normani sighs. “Also… I know you still smoke.”

Lauren scoffs and shakes her head, not meeting Normani’s eyes. “What? Of course- of course I don’t still… I stopped. You know that.”

Normani snorts, shakes her head, and pushes Lauren over onto her stomach. Despite Lauren’s protests, she pulls the packet of cigarettes out of her friend’s back pocket and holds it in front of her face, still sat on her back.

Smiling triumphantly at the red hue on Lauren’s cheeks, Normani laughs. “What do you call this?”

She’s referencing the pack of cigarettes, but Lauren huffs. “Another spinal injury if you don’t get off me.”

Normani laughs and moves off Lauren, and her friend rolls herself over with a loud sigh. “I told you I knew about the smoking.”

Lauren takes the cigarettes back, and when she takes one out of the packet, Normani takes it away from her and puts it back. “Hey. You said you knew.”

“Didn’t say I was fine with you doing it in my bedroom. Or anywhere near me.” Normani says, and Lauren rolls her eyes but puts the packet away. “I’m not going to yell at you for that. It’s your choice.”

“I don’t do it much,” Lauren promises her. “Just when I want to relax.”

“Like I said, your choice,” Normani says, “I told Camila ages ago and she’s the one who has to kiss you, so…”

“Yeah, she said she saw me doing it at Universal,” Lauren shrugs. “I don’t like to smoke around her, though. I’m relaxed enough when I’m with her.”

“That was weirdly cute,” Normani laughs. “Don’t you usually spend weekends with her?”

“Yeah, but it’s only half past twelve. Camila will be knocked out for another four hours,” Lauren replies. “Besides… I like hanging out just the two of us. I missed you a lot when we were fighting. I don’t think I’ve ever told you how much you coming to see me in the hospital meant.”

Normani hugs her. “Lo, you were hurt. Sure, I was mad at you, but when my mom told me what had happened… I had to see you. You nearly died and we hadn’t buried the hatchet. I don’t think I could’ve lived with the thought.”

“Hey,” Lauren smiles. “You’ll always be my best friend, Mani. No matter what.”

“Yeah,” Normani nods. “No matter what.”

-

“I can’t believe you’re sleeping through the celebrations.”

Camila’s eyes blink open and she groans at the familiar raspy voice. “Laur?”

“Mhm,” Lauren confirms, and Camila flips over and shuts her eyes again. “Hey, no, get up. I _will_ drag you out of bed. Don’t underestimate me.”

“What?” Camila mumbles. “Please don’t.”

“You’ve got to come and celebrate,” Lauren says, poking her in the arm. “Camz. Get up.”

“What am I celebrating?” Camila frowns, rubbing at her eyes and staring at Lauren. She’s not wearing her makeup, and she _still_ looks like the hottest thing to ever exist. “What’s happening?”

Lauren smiles at her, and leans over to kiss her. “You got into Juilliard.”

_That_ wakes Camila up. She sits bolt upright and stares at Lauren with an expression of the utmost shock. _“You’re joking_.”

“Nope,” Lauren laughs at her girlfriend’s reaction; really, Camila is adorable. When Sinu had called her, she’d had almost the exact same reaction, and had to call her mom into the room to help her up since she’d fallen out of her bed. “Your mom got a letter from them and couldn’t resist opening it. You got in.”

Camila shakes her head. “You’re joking.”

“I already assured you I’m not,” Lauren laughs. “Promise, Camz. I’m serious.”

“Oh my god!” Camila stares at her. “No. I didn’t. I can’t have. I’m not good enough for that.”

“Yes you are,” Lauren squeezes her hand. “I knew you were. And they clearly think so too. You’ve been accepted.”

“But- _no_ ,” Camila shakes her head. “That can’t be true. You’ve- you’re fucking with me.”

“Camila,” Lauren laughs exasperatedly. “I’m not joking. Come on.”

Before Camila can do anything else, Lauren has leaned over and pulled her onto her lap. They’re headed towards the door, and Camila still doesn’t believe her. There’s no way she could’ve—

_“Surprise!”_

Camila looks around in shock. Dinah, Ally and Normani are there, along with her mother, little sister, and… _her dad_.

“Papi!” Camila jumps off of Lauren’s lap and launches herself into her dad’s arms. “Oh my god. What’re you doing here?”

“Your mami called me and I got on the earliest flight.” Alejandro smiles, “I just got here a few minutes ago.”

“I’m so glad to see you,” Camila breathes into her dad’s shoulder. “Oh, um, papi, these are my friends, Normani, Ally and Dinah. And- um… that’s Lauren, she’s… she’s my girlfriend.”

Alejandro glances over at Lauren, and to Camila’s complete surprise, smiles. “You’d better treat her right.”

“I try my best.” Lauren assures him, and Camila is a little stunned by the lack of _girlfriend intimidation_ speech. “She’s a really special girl and I want to treat her the way she deserves.”

Camila smiles, and gives her dad another hug. “She does treat me right. I promise.”

Sinu laughs and passes her the open letter with the Juilliard seal on it. “I’m sorry I opened it, mija. I couldn’t resist.”

“I don’t blame you,” Camila laughs, and turns to her friends. “Did she call you guys too?”

“Yep,” Ally confirms for her. “and we told her not to wake you up so we could throw a celebratory party for you.”

“Yeah,” Dinah grins. “Always a good excuse to party.”

“Did Laur tell you she’s got a scholarship to NYU?” Normani asks. “You guys won’t be too far away from each other.”

“Yeah,” Camila smiles at looks over at Lauren, who has a faint blush rising across her cheek. “She did.”

While she’d expected to spend the whole day in bed, messing around on her computer, Camila finds herself having an eventful day. She spends time with her friends and family, and she’s so happy that Lauren finally gets to meet her dad, because she’s always been close to her father, and she loves Lauren with all her heart.

(Not that Lauren knows that just yet, but still.)

She’s in the middle of a _very_ intense game of hide and seek with Sofi when Dinah calls her. “Mila. I think you should go check on Lauren.”

Camila frowns. “Why? She’s just-”

Camila turns to where she’d left Lauren, expecting her to still be sat where she was ten minutes before. Instead, she’s nowhere to be seen.

“She went outside,” Dinah says, and Camila frowns. “Go talk to her. She looked kind of upset.”

Camila’s expression sours even more. She doesn’t understand why Lauren would be upset – it’s a happy night. Camila got into her dream college, she found out that she’ll be near Lauren, and there’s absolutely nothing that’s gone wrong. So _why_ did Lauren look upset?

Camila nods, and leaves Dinah, telling her to find Sofi for her. The front door is unlocked, so she figures Lauren got out that way; she wouldn’t be able to get down the back steps in her chair, anyway. She closes the door behind her, but grabs a key just in case, because Sinu has a really bad habit of locking any door that’s left open. She doesn’t have to look far for Lauren – turns out, her girlfriend is sat on the grass, her chair beside her.

“How’d you get down there?” Camila smirks. “Throw yourself out of your chair?”

“Pretty much,” Lauren answers, not in a joking tone. “Aren’t you busy partying?”

“I was, but then I wanted to know why you were busy sulking.” Camila counters, sitting down on the grass next to Lauren. She takes her girl’s hand with a smile. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong.” Lauren answers unconvincingly. “I’m not sulking.”

_Clearly you are_. That’s what Camila wants to say. But knowing that Lauren isn’t exactly the most open book in the world, she decides to change the subject and work on making Lauren smile. “Well, I’m definitely not sulking. I got into my dream school.”

The effect is immediate. Lauren beams. “I’m so proud of you.”

“I’m proud of me too,” Camila grins. “Like, for one thing, it’s my _dream school_ , and also it’s relatively close to where you’ll be. I can go to my dream school and hang out with my girlfriend who’ll be studying to be the next President.”

Lauren laughs. “I doubt I’ll be _President_. I do want to go into government, though.”

Camila smiles. “That’s great. I’ll be able to blame you for everything that goes wrong in my life.”

Lauren snorts. “Nope. That’ll be nobody’s fault but yours. I _do_ want to make healthcare free, though. The healthcare in this country is so expensive and it already fucked my parents over because they wouldn’t let me die. I don’t want parents to have to choose between the medical bills or letting their kid die.”

Camila takes Lauren’s hand and kisses her cheek. “Well, someone once told me to go after what you’re passionate about. I believe you’ll make that change, Laur.”

Lauren hums, but she’s turned slightly more downcast again. “Camz… I’m dying.”

Camila feels like the air has been sucked out of her lungs. She can’t believe her ears. No. There’s no way Lauren just said that. “What?”

Lauren’s face cracks into a grin and she bursts out laughing. “I forgot to finish my sentence. I’m _dyeing_ my hair black again soon.”

“You’re the _worst_ ,” Camila smacks Lauren on the arm. Lauren winces, but Camila doesn’t apologise; she deserves it. “You _terrified me_.”

“I wanted to get your opinion on my choice.” Lauren shrugs. “To dye my hair black again, or stick with my natural colour that’s pretty much almost black anyway. Thoughts?”

“My _thoughts_ ,” Camila starts, “are that _you’re the worst_.”

Lauren laughs. “I was messing with you. I’ve got my whole life ahead of me, Camz. Sorry, but I’ll be annoying you for a while.”

Camila sighs and grips onto Lauren’s hand like it’s her lifeline. “You scared me so much. I thought this was going to be like _The Fault In Our Stars.”_

“Camila, I’m paralysed, not sick,” Lauren points out with a laugh. “The only way I’m going to go any time soon is if I steal Dinah’s Cheetos. Then she’d finish me off.”

“Whatever.” Camila replies. “You frightened me because you looked all sad and then you suddenly announced that you were _dying_ and I thought that’s why you were moping.”

Lauren kisses her. “Sorry. And I was so-called _moping_ because my mom texted me and told me she’s booked me a dentist appointment. I’m scared of the dentist.”

Camila breathes out a sigh of relief, glad that it was something mundane and _not_ life threatening. “Oh, well, a dentist appointment serves you right after scaring me like that.”

“I _guess_ it does,” Lauren sighs, and nods over at her wheelchair. “Help me up? We should get back to your celebrations.”

“No,” Camila shakes her head. “I like it. Sitting under the stars with you.”

Lauren hums, and lies back, staring up at the constellations. “Do you know any? Constellations, I mean.”

“No,” Camila lies down and points up at a long line of stars. “I’m making my own. That one is called _The Worm_.”

Lauren snorts. “Nice. I know the basic ones, like Orion’s Belt. Stuff like that.”

“Would you want to move in together?” Camila hesitantly asks, and for a split second, wonders how looking at the stars had prompted that thought. “For college, I mean. You’re not going to ditch me and live on your own, right?”

“Well, external student housing offer little studio apartments,” Lauren shrugs. “For couples. And my mom has been badgering me about housing for months because I’d need somewhere accessible. She thinks it’d be a good idea for me to have someone and was going on about moving with me, which I’d rather not happen.”

Camila laughs. “Living with your mom? Alright, have fun with that.”

“No, no, I _don’t_ want to do that,” Lauren shakes her head. “She worries about me a lot. I think my whole _super independent_ thing has her stressed. I told her I wanted to live alone. Maybe it’d be a comfort to her if we shared one of those studios I was talking about.”

“So…” Camila trails off, “that’s a yes?”

“That’s a yes,” Lauren confirms with a smile. “Plus, we’ll get a bigger space. When I was thinking about going into dorms, everyone else gets a roommate and a tiny little room, whereas I’d get this big single one. Handicap perks at their finest.”

Camila smiles and squeezes Lauren’s hand. “I’m just… really happy, Lauren.”

“Yeah?” Lauren smiles. “Me too, Camz.”

“No, but, I mean,” Camila looks over at Lauren and hopes she can convey that she’s telling the truth through the sincerity in her eyes. “Lauren… I’m in love with you.”

Lauren stares at her, not sure if she imagined the words or not. “Um… did you- did you really say that or did I just imagine it?”

Camila smiles and squeezes Lauren’s hand, her heart going crazy. “Yeah. I’m in love with you, Lauren. I’m _so_ in love with you.”

“I- _Camz_ ,” Lauren’s grip on Camila’s hand tightens. “I’m in love with you, too. Oh my god, I’m so in love with you.”

Camila beams, and Lauren feels her heart flutter, because _she_ caused that. She always feels overwhelmingly proud when she makes Camila happy. “Thank god. I was terrified you’d just be like _thanks, Camz_.”

Lauren laughs. “Camila, trust me. I’ve known how much I love you for a while now.”

“Really?” Camila asks, and her curiosity gets the better of her. “How’d you know?”

“It wasn’t like, a specific moment. Nothing happened that made me go _wow_ , _I love her_. It was gradual.” Lauren shrugs, her thumb tracing softly over Camila’s knuckles as she looks up at the stars. “I realised I was falling when I started to think that maybe Lucy wasn’t my soulmate after all.”

Camila’s breath catches in her throat and she stares at Lauren, trying to make eye contact with her, but Lauren stares straight up at the sky. “You started thinking that?”

“Yes. And I realised that she wasn’t. That you are.” Lauren says, and Camila feels like she could explode from happiness. Even through everything, in Camila’s mind, even if Lauren had told her she loved her too, she’d still always be second to Lucy. “I felt guilty at first. Like I was screwing her over. Cheating on her. I thought about what she’d say, and the things that came to mind made me wonder if maybe Mani was right all along.”

Camila can’t believe what she’s hearing. “What?”

“So I talked to her,” Lauren continues on as if Camila hadn’t spoken, “I went to Mani and I asked her to tell me everything she thought about Lucy. Everything I’d always refused to hear. Some of the things she said, I found myself agreeing with, and that made me feel even guiltier. Like I was insulting her memory.”

“The things she was right about… I always thought that was normal until you. I always thought that it was normal, the amount of control she had over me. How she could get me to do anything for her. But she’d never do the same.” Lauren’s grip on Camila’s hand tightens, and the younger girl shifts over so she’s pressed against Lauren’s side, hoping that she can comfort her. “If the roles were reversed. If I was the one who died. I know that if she got the chance to go back, she’d go back and change it for herself. Not for me.”

“I always thought that was normal, that it was just how she was.” Lauren continues. “She tried to get me to quit softball and said it was cutting into our time together. That was the one thing I wouldn’t do. Any time I’d talk to her about it, about _any_ of my interests, she’d just shrug me off and tell me she didn’t care. That I should shut up and do whatever she wanted me to do. And I would.”

“I think Mani was right.” Lauren sighs. “After everything, I understand now. And I don’t think she’d still be with me, if she’d gotten out of the accident and I was still injured. It’s funny, really. The thing that made me not give up… the idea that Lucy would’ve told me it didn’t mean my life was over… it’s not even _true_. She _would’ve_ thought my life was over.”

Camila stares at Lauren, tears in her eyes. “Laur…”

“But it’s not. That’s the _point_.” Finally, Lauren turns to look at her, but unlike Camila, her eyes are shining with _happiness_ , not tears. “Whatever happened to Lucy… either way, I’d still be with you right now. Even- even if the accident happened at _all_ , I’d still have fallen for you, Camila. You’re my soulmate. I know that and I believe that no matter what had happened, we’d have found one another. Even if I’d have died in that car. If not in this life, then the next one.”

Camila swallows the lump in her throat. “You really mean all of that?”

“I promise you I do.” Lauren kisses her cheek and nuzzles against her. “The girls mentioned that you thought you were my second choice. That no matter what, you’d always be second to Lucy. That’s not true and it never has been. I’d always pick you first, Camz.”

Camila’s heart soars. She isn’t sure if Lauren knows just how much those words mean to her. “I’d pick you first too, Lo.”

Lauren watches her, her eyes bright. She squeezes Camila’s hand three times and looks back up at the sky. “Forever. I promise you that. I know we’ve got our whole lives ahead of us, but I want more than that. I want infinity with you.”

Camila rests her head on Lauren’s shoulder with a content sigh. Lauren’s right – she’s got her whole life ahead of her, and the whole world to explore. Ever since she was little, she’d been afraid of the future or the slightest change, and she’d been forever worried that she’d never find love.

But with Lauren by her side, Camila feels like she could conquer the universe.


End file.
